Need Help Stop Staring at Hot (Straight) Guy at Work

  • MadeinMich

    Posts: 1624

    Jun 29, 2010 4:40 AM GMT
    I have a problem. I cannot stop making slight glances at this really hot, muscular, russian guy at my job. I try to look at him when I don't think he's looking, but lately he's been catching me making quick gazes at him. I try to avoid eye contact..And please keep in mind this is the real world not a gay eutopia where hot, striaght guys all are gay just because you want him. I mean he is the only good thing to look at at my job. There really is no one in my world of everyday fat people who look like him. I don't want him to confront me and be like "stop looking at me". Has anyone else had an experience with this? Does anyone know how to handle this situation? What wold you do in this case?
  • MadeinMich

    Posts: 1624

    Jun 29, 2010 4:43 AM GMT
    Any words of insight would help. How can I keep looking without getting caught.
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    Jun 29, 2010 6:49 AM GMT
    Don't stare at him?

    Show him the respect people deserve?

    An attractive man catches my attention. Staring at him objectifies him. He's not a man then, he's a sex object.

    "Take a picture, it will last longer." I don't know where I heard this phrase, but it makes a good point. This is a man with real feelings and a real life. Treat him like that.
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    Jun 29, 2010 7:03 AM GMT
    Well just stop starring. think of him as a co worker and not a hot (straight) guy lol
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    Jun 29, 2010 7:23 AM GMT
    Well, i think you should get to know him some more (if you dont already). if hes one of those kinda laid back kind of straight guys just go up to him and say:

    "Hey i know you've been noticing me staring at you but its only because im gay and i find you really attractive"

    ...or something along those lines. but ifs hes one of those gay bashing straight guys dont say a thing and keep staring and when he confronts you just be like sorry i just space out alot xD.

    theres many different ways this situation can go
  • MadeinMich

    Posts: 1624

    Jun 29, 2010 11:31 AM GMT
    i should clarify. its more of glances that i make towards him. i do the whole pretend like i'm grazing the whole room and more so sneak a glance at him
  • jlly_rnchr

    Posts: 1759

    Jun 29, 2010 11:45 AM GMT
    Wear sunglasses all the time, he'll never know what you're looking at.
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    Jun 29, 2010 11:47 AM GMT
    Occupy you mind with some musing of your mother/father/loved ones.

    Imagine what they would thing if they caught you staring at this bloke..

    Or stare at the floor when he catches you!
  • hikerC

    Posts: 170

    Jun 29, 2010 12:11 PM GMT
    I know exactly what you are going through! I went through this for 2 years with a hot straight guy I used to work with. I had a huge crush on the guy, and what made it really hard was that he was a nice, friendly guy too. You can't help it, and you know you are doing it, and no matter what you try to do, you want to look at him! I just tried very hard to occupy myself with other things and act as normal as possible around him. Other than that, I can't give any advice other than to do your best in this impossible situation! Somehow I got through it and we are pretty good friends now. I don't think I ever let on how I felt either, I perfected my "Straight-acting" skills so much that gay guys now ask me "Are you sure you're gay?" :icon_confused.gif
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    Jun 29, 2010 12:33 PM GMT
    If you haven't talked to him yet, ask him about his workout routine. Pay a casual complement that it has obviously worked for him and you're open to new workouts. Then you can engage him asking how he finds the US as a Russian, language issues, etc. Unless he is very quiet and withdrawn, he will probably enjoy and appreciate your interest. Then since a context is established, if he catches you glancing, you can make a quick nod or smile, and all is well.
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    Jun 29, 2010 12:44 PM GMT
    MadeinMich saidAny words of insight would help. How can I keep looking without getting caught.

    You can't. People always know when someone is looking at them, no matter how much stealth is being used.
    If you want to know how to stop, just focus your mind on the possibility of getting fired for "creating a hostile workplace environment."
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    Jun 29, 2010 12:44 PM GMT
    hahah i feel ya bud. My boss is kinda cute. mainly just his ass is really nice. so luckily for me i only really look when he walking away... then i go back to work.
    Honestly it sucks but the best advice is.... GET YO FUCKING WORK DONE AND STOP STARING AT THE CUTE BOYS!
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    Jun 29, 2010 2:30 PM GMT
    as if straight guys ask for help to stop staring at the hot chick
  • rnch

    Posts: 11524

    Jun 29, 2010 2:42 PM GMT
    "this thread is useless without pics" icon_wink.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 29, 2010 2:47 PM GMT
    MadeinMich saidAny words of insight would help. How can I keep looking without getting caught.
    Wear sunglasses at work so he won't notice you staring.
  • rnch

    Posts: 11524

    Jun 29, 2010 2:48 PM GMT
    paulflexes said
    MadeinMich saidAny words of insight would help. How can I keep looking without getting caught.
    Wear sunglasses at work so he won't notice you staring.
    is this the "voice of experience" speaking? icon_cool.gif
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    Jun 29, 2010 2:53 PM GMT
    Print out a pic of an even hotter guy...keep it in your drawer and whenever you find yourself wanting to peek at your coworker look at the pic instead.
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Jun 29, 2010 2:54 PM GMT
    My suggestion is to try and create a friendship if at all possible. It sounds like you might have a few things in common anyway. Talk about fitness and working out.. lots of ways to crack the ice.
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    Jun 29, 2010 2:56 PM GMT
    TexDef07 said
    MadeinMich saidAny words of insight would help. How can I keep looking without getting caught.

    You can't. People always know when someone is looking at them, no matter how much stealth is being used.
    If you want to know how to stop, just focus your mind on the possibility of getting fired for "creating a hostile workplace environment."



    This.
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    Jun 29, 2010 2:57 PM GMT
    MadeinMich said How can I keep looking without getting caught.


    This is just sad.
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    Jun 29, 2010 3:01 PM GMT
    meninlove said
    TexDef07 said
    MadeinMich saidAny words of insight would help. How can I keep looking without getting caught.

    You can't. People always know when someone is looking at them, no matter how much stealth is being used.
    If you want to know how to stop, just focus your mind on the possibility of getting fired for "creating a hostile workplace environment."



    This.


    Yeah, he definitely knows you're looking at him. I've caught guys like that, it's an uncomfy feeling if he's not enjoying it.
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    Jun 29, 2010 3:05 PM GMT
    Wear mirrored sunglasses.
  • hikerC

    Posts: 170

    Jun 29, 2010 3:17 PM GMT
    HndsmKansan saidMy suggestion is to try and create a friendship if at all possible. It sounds like you might have a few things in common anyway. Talk about fitness and working out.. lots of ways to crack the ice.


    Great advice! This way you get to know him and begin to see him as just one of the guys you work with, and take him off that pedestal you put him on. Still not an easy situation, but thats how I got over it. (Still took 2 years!) I sure loved going to work! icon_biggrin.gif
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    Jun 29, 2010 3:40 PM GMT
    And behind your mirror sunglasses, you can undress him with your eyes...

    959ae067.jpg
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    Jun 29, 2010 3:43 PM GMT
    MadeinMich saidI have a problem. I cannot stop making slight glances at this really hot, muscular, russian guy at my job. I try to look at him when I don't think he's looking, but lately he's been catching me making quick gazes at him. I try to avoid eye contact..And please keep in mind this is the real world not a gay eutopia where hot, striaght guys all are gay just because you want him. I mean he is the only good thing to look at at my job. There really is no one in my world of everyday fat people who look like him. I don't want him to confront me and be like "stop looking at me". Has anyone else had an experience with this? Does anyone know how to handle this situation? What wold you do in this case?



    I got the perfect solution... quit your job