Ex-boyfriend booty call

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 09, 2010 2:59 AM GMT
    Ok, so my ex and I dated for about 2.5 years, lived together, and had a decent relationship. As time went on, trust became a big issue, primarily because we were both young (21/22), and we were both each other's first real relationship. So in the back of our minds, was always, "what else is out there?"

    So sparing some details, we broke up, and did not talk for nearly 6 months. We had a couple mutual friends, so we were still informed of each others "activities." Randomly, we started talking again, it started with just txts and emails, and then phone calls, and then we hung out a couple of times. We have argued a few times about the "issues" in our relationship, but neither of us are really letting go, and it's been over a year. It was recently his birthday, and I did not go to the party, but received a drunken phone call at 1am, that was first very casual, and then he said he wanted me to come over to have sex. I laughed it off, and told him to go to bed, and hung up. He's not the type of guy to do that, and does not even hook-up.

    Now I'm trying to figure out, if I have dropped that low on his list to be the drunken booty call, or was the call suppressed feelings that we should talk about. I talked to him the day after, and he has no idea what he said, and I don't really know how to tell him. Any suggestions, or anyone experience the ex boyfriend drunken booty call before?
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    Jul 09, 2010 3:22 AM GMT
    Move on the next life
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    Jul 09, 2010 3:30 AM GMT
    Pretty simple he was drunk and horny, thinking about some the great sex you had together and wanted to relive it; take it as a complement.
    Him (pretending to) not remember is typical; good for you not going over.
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    Jul 09, 2010 6:43 AM GMT
    I had that happen to my ex... when he was in states that he would call me.. It didnt bother me though... but I knew i shouldn;t take that seriously... you dont know really what you're doing in that state.... what happens while your both sober is more important
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    Jul 09, 2010 7:02 AM GMT
    I am friendly with most of my exes.
    I have sex with my friends.
    So, sometimes I have sex with an ex who is also a friend.

    If you still get into arguments about your relationship, it is an awful idea. But, you can totally have sex with your ex if you are able to put all the relationship-drama behind you and not be romantically interested.
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    Jul 09, 2010 7:20 AM GMT
    Rodmramer saidMove on the next life


    Cosigned.

    It's a dysfunctional tale that should have ended when you first broke up.
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    Jul 09, 2010 4:12 PM GMT
    I don't see how receiving a drunken booty call is the equivalent of being low on his list. Especially since you say you've been talking at other parts of the day. Like dustin said above, he was probably thinking of all the great sex you'd had before.
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    Jul 09, 2010 4:23 PM GMT
    It's pretty simple, buddy. That was a typical booty call from a very drunk and horny ex-bf. There's no need to go psychoanalyst on this and tear yourself apart just from thinking too hard about it.

    If you think about it it makes perfect sense for him to call you up at some odd time of the night. You are an ex and you are familiar to him, therefore you are more accessible to him then some random stranger and there's a sense of comfort in knowing that. He was drunk and horny and rather then waste his time trying to find some strange it would be easier for him to just hook up with you sense he already knows you and you've already dated. Very common these days.

    Personally, I wouldn't entertain the possibility of being my ex-bf's booty call (unless I was really horny myself and knew it wouldn't jeopardize my situation) because that sends mixed signals and you're more likely to get hurt over something but that's just me. For whatever reason (good or bad) he's an ex and unless you plan on getting back with him then I say skip over that option and just move on.
  • Regina_Guy

    Posts: 406

    Jul 09, 2010 4:29 PM GMT
    Personally I'm not so sure this was just a drunken booty call. Sounds like there are still some feelings between the two of you. It's probably worth talking to him about it.
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    Jul 10, 2010 1:11 AM GMT
    unfounded7 saidI don't see how receiving a drunken booty call is the equivalent of being low on his list. Especially since you say you've been talking at other parts of the day. Like dustin said above, he was probably thinking of all the great sex you'd had before.


    It's a bad thing, because he always talks about how he is disgusted by guys that hook up. Which is why this whole situation is weird. Although, I agree with everyone, about how he was just drunk and horny.

    I asked a mutual friend about it, and he just laughed, and said that the two of us should just get back together already. Idk, I guess I just wanted to hear what other guys have done in similar situations.
  • MrXanderM

    Posts: 49

    Jul 10, 2010 1:23 AM GMT
    lol..

    this happened to me oh 1 year after. Honestly. just move on, cause trust me, its not worth the drama.
  • jrs1

    Posts: 4388

    Jul 10, 2010 1:28 AM GMT
    MunchingZombie saidI am friendly with most of my exes.
    I have sex with my friends.
    So, sometimes I have sex with an ex who is also a friend.

    we need to become better acquainted ...
  • mybud

    Posts: 11837

    Jul 10, 2010 1:37 AM GMT
    Dude...he was drunk... save yourself a lot of headache and hardship.....for your best interests...forget it and move on.....BUD
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    Jul 10, 2010 5:09 AM GMT
    XanderD saidIt's a bad thing, because he always talks about how he is disgusted by guys that hook up.

    It's often the ones who proclaim how disgusted they are by some behavior that turn around and do the very thing they're disgusted by. Typical human behavior. Nevertheless, there's nothing inherently disgusting about two guys hooking up.
  • Regina_Guy

    Posts: 406

    Jul 10, 2010 5:20 AM GMT
    Well he probably does think hooking up with random guys is disgusting. However that wasn't the case. He was trying to hook up with someone he was in a long-term relationship with.

    He still has feelings for you dude.
  • mtneerman

    Posts: 476

    Jul 10, 2010 5:50 AM GMT
    this wasn't an attempt for a random hookup, so don't think of yourself as being low on any list. i've had sex with exes, it's easy and convenient, but if there are lingering feelings by either of you, which it sounds like there is on both sides, i wouldn't do it.
  • Greygull

    Posts: 282

    Jul 10, 2010 7:19 AM GMT
    I'd say that there's nothing really to be worried about, exes are the first people you drunk dial. But to me it sounds like you have some feelings for this guy and it goes both way, why not try it again for a while, and if it doesn't work out it doesn't work out.