Liar, delusional on drugs?

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  Jul 18, 2010 2:28 AM GMT

  I recently went out with a guy that kept hitting me up on a social networking site. I finally said i would meet up with him . We grabbed some food and went to a museum. He seemed smart and urbane. He said he had a great time and made a point to ask me when he could see me again. The next day I emailed him thanking him for the nice time ....but no response. I emailed him a bunch more thinking maybe he lost my email or something....I texted him ( I know, I know I'm not supposed to communicate after a date, but i am old school) I finally got an irritated reply saying that he never said he wanted to see me again. Fine, all I wanted was closure.
  
  Then last week I am walking down the street and this guy walks up to me and tries to make conversation ..."Do you remember me?, etc......it was the same guy.....what the fuck...I just looked in his eyes and walked on. Are theses guys compulsive liars or are they on drugs and don't know what they are doing or are they wired so differently they think other people are characters in video games.

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  Jul 18, 2010 2:39 AM GMT

  You haven't learned the 3-day-gay-rule?
  Damn dude, where've you been?
  You gotta give at least three days before expecting a reply.
  

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  Jul 18, 2010 9:39 AM GMT

  Sorry, I get why this is annoying, but I don't get why that makes the guy a liar.
  
  In response to your question it sounds like he sees men as sexual objects, and not much more. I think you are just all about him.
  
  
  
  

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  Jul 18, 2010 5:04 PM GMT

  Alpha13 said Are theses guys compulsive liars or are they on drugs and don't know what they are doing or are they wired so differently they think other people are characters in video games.

  
  
  All of the above. It's called being gay

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  Jul 18, 2010 5:09 PM GMT

  He had the opportunity to spend more time with you and blew it. His loss big time.

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  Jul 18, 2010 5:18 PM GMT

  UrsaMajor saidSorry, I get why this is annoying, but I don't get why that makes the guy a liar.
  
  In response to your question it sounds like he sees men as sexual objects, and not much more. I think you are just all about him.
  
  
  
  

  He said he had a nice time. He said he wanted to see me again. Should I ignore every word coming from a gay guys mouth?

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  Jul 18, 2010 5:20 PM GMT

  Multiple Personality Disorder.

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• Celticmusl
  
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  Jul 18, 2010 5:20 PM GMT

  He's kookoo for Cocoa Puffs. Tell him you're no longer his Booberry and be done with it.

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  Jul 18, 2010 5:30 PM GMT

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  Jul 18, 2010 5:33 PM GMT

  Celticmusl saidHe's kookoo for Cocoa Puffs. Tell him you're no longer his Booberry and be done with it.

  
  
  Awesome reply is awesome

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• DanOmatic
  
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  Jul 18, 2010 5:35 PM GMT

  Though annoying in the extreme, best just to move on and not give it much further thought. Whatever the reasons are, it's pretty plain that you'd be getting a diminishing return on any type of investment (time, energy, emotion, etc) with this guy.
  
  

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  Jul 18, 2010 7:51 PM GMT

  [quote][cite]NC3athlete said[/cite]Though annoying in the extreme, best just to move on and not give it much further thought. Whatever the reasons are, it's pretty plain that you'd be getting a diminishing return on any type of investment (time, energy, emotion, etc) with this guy.
  
  I have no intention .I am amazed that anyone can behave in that manner. And scarier it seems to be a norm among gay guys.

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• mtneerman
  
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  Jul 18, 2010 8:04 PM GMT

  Alpha13 said I emailed him a bunch more thinking maybe he lost my email or something....

  
  
  
  i have to question the word "bunch" in your story. i talked to a guy on the phone once on my way out of town for a few days, when i got home i had over 100 emails from him, some of the last ones were calling up the devil to take my soul. so, yeah, next time he called i pretty much told him what you heard.

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  Jul 18, 2010 8:08 PM GMT

  A year ago I would have been like WTF is up with that weirdo! Now all I can say is yeah guys are like that. At every stage in their life.

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  Jul 18, 2010 8:08 PM GMT

  dude i was busy at work and couldn't take your texting every 5 minutes.

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• DanOmatic
  
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  Jul 18, 2010 8:12 PM GMT

  It does seem to be more or less par for the course in the dating world these days, unfortunately. I'm not sure if it's just a gay thing, though--many of my straight friends have told me similar stories. More than anything, I think it's a by-product of internet sites, whereby individuals become little more than disposable profiles (and there's always a better one if you just scroll down a page or two, right?). It gives people (gay and straight) license to treat others like assholes, because there are no personal repercussions. And that attitude then extends into their interactions in person with someone they associate with meeting online.
  
  

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  Jul 18, 2010 8:19 PM GMT

  Well unfortunately, this guy has serious issues no matter what the cause. Drug addicts/alcoholics often look and behave much the same as crazy people, because in both instances there is a hyper-focus on the self. A neurotic preoccupation with self interest resulting in extreme selfishness, rudeness and the inability to care about others are hallmarks of the problem which ever one it is. If he is incapable of a 15 second courtesy reply, the whopping 15 seconds it takes to say, hey busy now get back to you soon, then you shouldn't bother giving it even another 15 seconds of your brain power. End of story. The above poster was right, if he behaves this way now, it will not improve, in fact if you give him any attention at all, it will simply teach him that it's fine to treat you/others that way and he can still get what he wants. You did the right thing by walking away, now put him down and forget him. And yes it is all too common these days, but it's not isolated to gay people, straight people behave the same way. I'm convinced its a greater societal ill increasing with each generation, we have continually become more and more preoccupied with self and have become largely incapable of really giving a damn about the way others feel. However, there are still great guys in the world, our task is just to find those needles in the haystack.

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• Hunter9
  
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  Jul 18, 2010 8:22 PM GMT

  there is nothing rational about his behavior. who knows if he is/was on drugs and/or has psychological issues, but at this point he's not worth your time.

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