Worst pickup lines ever?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 22, 2010 7:25 PM GMT
    I was just wondering what are some of the worst pickup lines that either you've used or heard before...

    "Hey. I forgot my number, so can I have yours?"

    or, guy picks up a sugar packet, "I'm sorry, I think you dropped your nametag."

    ...what else?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 22, 2010 9:51 PM GMT
    When someone walks up to me and the first thing they say is, "You're hot." At least ask my name first and tell me yours.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 22, 2010 10:16 PM GMT
    True story...happened a couple years ago in a bar on Sobe:

    Backstory: I'd watched the dude go from person to person, asking the same question, for over 30 minutes. He was the most desperate and homeliest person I've ever seen in my entire life, even to this day. Eventually he worked his way around to me, even though I was doing my best to ignore him.

    Him: "Hi, are you here to have sex?" (yeah, that was his opening line)
    Me: "Yes."
    Him: "Would you like to come over to my place?"
    Me: "I said I'm here to have sex, but I didn't say it would be with you."

    He left the bar crying. icon_lol.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 22, 2010 11:27 PM GMT
    When a guy put his hands around my shoulder and said,"hey, i like you!!"
    Do you even know me,mate? To me, apparently not. wanker

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 24, 2010 11:04 PM GMT
    Well, I used to work as a doorman in a bar, so come closing time I had a few real winners. I think among my favourite was a slip of paper with the hotel name and room number written on it. Not even the effort to speak one word to me to me- she just held it out to give it to me then walked away with an assumption I would be knocking on her door in a half hour.
  • mybud

    Posts: 11837

    Jul 24, 2010 11:14 PM GMT
    This guy said,"if I told ya had a beautiful body would you hold it against me"? I felt my fist clinch.......
  • Twenty_Someth...

    Posts: 1388

    Jul 24, 2010 11:28 PM GMT
    Guy: Do I know you? I think we've met before.

    Me: Where?

    Guy: Once upon a dream

    Me: Haha thats good... (turn to mind my own business again)

    Guy: One more thing...

    Me: Whats that?

    Guy: Does our fairy tale have a HAPPY ENDING?(winks and smiles a sleazy smile)

    Me: No
  • LJay

    Posts: 11612

    Jul 24, 2010 11:50 PM GMT
    Hi, Honey,,,

    The flesh crawls.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 24, 2010 11:58 PM GMT
    All of them.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 25, 2010 12:00 AM GMT
    "McDonald's isn't the only thing that is super-sized..."


    "If I tossed this quarter, what are the chances of me getting head?"


    "Help me! I'm gay but I've been thinking I may actually be straight! Please have sex with me and remove any doubt from my head!"
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 25, 2010 12:21 AM GMT
    Place: supermarket shopping for some veggies...

    him: Do you live near {random intersection in the city}

    me: No, i do not

    him: Oh ok, you just looked familiar.

    me: It's alright, i get that alot.

    him: You REALLY look familiar though, {he looks around to see if there were other people around}. Have we fu(ked before?

    me: **Blank stare** ... um, no, and i need to get back to my shopping.

    him: well, you are my type and we can definitely make this happen.

    me: I'm your type? whats your "type?"

    him: you know, GRRRRRRR (he actually growled at me!!!). Hairy, light skinned, big guys like you!

    me: (disgusted and agitated) Good bye sir!

    him: See, thats why i do not like you light skinned men... yall so cocky!

    --i just proceeded to the next aisle. I guess i deserved that since i actually reciprocated conversation past him stating that i look familiar.--
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 25, 2010 12:29 AM GMT
    bpguru saidGuy: Do I know you? I think we've met before.

    Me: Where?

    Guy: Once upon a dream

    Me: Haha thats good... (turn to mind my own business again)

    Guy: One more thing...

    Me: Whats that?

    Guy: Does our fairy tale have a HAPPY ENDING?(winks and smiles a sleazy smile)

    Me: No


    THIS IS AWESOME!!!!!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 25, 2010 12:30 AM GMT
    Him: Hi

    Me: Hi

    Him: You're hot, I'd like you to have my babies

    Me: icon_eek.gificon_confused.gif


  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 25, 2010 1:13 AM GMT
    I think for boldness it was a guy at the Minneapolis Eagle, when I was in town on business. He moved over 2 stools to sit next to me at the bar, and without any word of introduction he reached his hand right out and touched my cheek, saying "Nice facial hair." I had a trim beard at that time.

    I usually dislike being touched by a stranger, and my instinctive response was to be turned off by it. But he went right on to tell me how much he liked guys with beards like mine. And he was very good looking, my age range, nice voice, and made intelligent, pleasant conversation.

    So, OK, I took him back to my hotel room with me where he stayed the night. Not the greatest guy in bed, but a bird in my bush is worth two in the bar. Is that how that goes? icon_wink.gif

    We didn't do a repeat the next night when my business was again completed for the day, and in fact I went instead to the Saloon, where I found a different trick. In those days when I was traveling on the road & horny I considered "Hello" to be a good pick-up line. icon_rolleyes.gif
  • Starboard

    Posts: 242

    Jul 25, 2010 1:27 AM GMT
    "You look just like my ex"
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 25, 2010 1:41 AM GMT
    In a New Orleans bar, a young man said to me,

    "Hi, my friends want to get you for me for my birthday!"

    I replied, "They have a cake they want me to jump out of or can I just wear a bow?"

    He laughed; I left. icon_rolleyes.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 25, 2010 2:15 AM GMT
    Starboard said"You look just like my ex"
    That one actually works well if you word it correctly. icon_wink.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 25, 2010 2:17 AM GMT
    west77 saidWell, I used to work as a doorman in a bar, so come closing time I had a few real winners. I think among my favourite was a slip of paper with the hotel name and room number written on it. Not even the effort to speak one word to me to me- she just held it out to give it to me then walked away with an assumption I would be knocking on her door in a half hour.


    I had the same exact thing happen to me. I had checked out of a Sam's Club, and was headed for the exit. You know the people at the doors always take your receipt and check it against what you have. This time, I did not have much, so did not have a cart and had it all in my hands, including the receipt. She took the receipt, made the mark on it, gave it back to me, along with another piece of paper that simply had her phone number on it and a note that said "call me".
  • Celticmusl

    Posts: 4330

    Jul 25, 2010 2:21 AM GMT
    I hate it when they have a woman, or lesbian, or friend, come over and tell me that so-and-so likes me, or ask me if I want to meet someone. I am most often polite, and I like meeting new people, but if he doesn't have the confidence in himself to start a conversation I have little interest. I also feel like I'm dealing with school children.
  • conquer

    Posts: 305

    Jul 25, 2010 2:34 AM GMT
    back home (small town northern british columbia), i had a really unattractive, overweight guy with black nail polish approach me in the video store "i like your hat, i have the same one in leather." i was too stunned to even reply,its such a random thing to say. i'm not even sure what i did other than walk away. i have been teased by my best friend for years about this lol
  • upsguy68

    Posts: 270

    Jul 25, 2010 2:43 AM GMT
    "Wanna grab a pizza and fuck?"

    "What? You don't like pizza?"
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 25, 2010 2:44 AM GMT
    AussieBody saidNice shoes, wanna fuck?
    Works for me! icon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 25, 2010 2:47 AM GMT
    First thing out of his mouth:

    Him: Wanna suck my __?
    Me: No, thank you
    Him: I really think you'd like it.
    Me: I probably wouldn't.

    This repeats a couple of times. This actually happened at a friend's house. That friend had introduced us quite eagerly. I couldn't even leave.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 25, 2010 2:53 AM GMT
    Ehmmm, Ive never actually heard, nor used a pick-up line... Im not kdding you icon_redface.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jul 25, 2010 2:54 AM GMT
    devilish_intentions saidHim: Hi

    Me: Hi

    Him: You're hot, I'd like you to have my babies

    Me: icon_eek.gificon_confused.gif




    Hmmm, I actually think that s a cute one icon_smile.gif