would you date someone with herpes?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 08, 2010 7:33 PM GMT
    Hey guys I need advice. I met a guy two weeks ago and we really hit it off. We have been spending a lot time together and it seems we really like each other. Recently he told me he had genital herpes. I'm not sure what to do now. I reacted well and just told him I need time to figure out if I want to become more intimate with him. Of course there are other things to consider....I'm applying for grad school and could be moving in Jan or I may end up staying where I'm at now. anyways....my question is would you date someone with genital herpes? what should I do?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 08, 2010 7:37 PM GMT
    I would not date, because it is contagious. Consult with a doctor to confirm this, because I'm not a medical professional, but I believe this is true. A doctor may be able to tell you how to have safe sex with him, if that's possible.

    I'm not a coward, and lived with an HIV poz guy for several years, who was the top (with a condom). But some STDs are more contagious than HIV, and so I urge you to get a medical opinion.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 08, 2010 7:43 PM GMT
    he told me he is on medication and hasn't had an outbreak in almost a year...i'm going to talk to my doctor...it seems that 1/4 people have it and most don't even know they have herpes.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 08, 2010 7:49 PM GMT
    ASR21 saidhe told me he is on medication and hasn't had an outbreak in almost a year...i'm going to talk to my doctor...it seems that 1/4 people have it and most don't even know they have herpes.

    Well, most of us have herpes, if we've ever had a mouth sore. Genital herpes is another matter, and so do talk to a doctor, not with me or anyone else online.

    I wouldn't totally write this guy off, nor more than I did my partner with HIV. But I would consult with a doctor first, to get a risk assessment. Until that happens, don't date him, at least not sexually. Then make an informed decision.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 08, 2010 8:03 PM GMT
    He cares very much about you, and your well-being, because he told you.
    That's very big and wonderful stuff that he did.

    Here:

    " There's no cure for this recurrent infection, which may cause embarrassment and emotional distress. Having genital herpes is no reason to avoid sex or give up on relationships though. If you or your partner is infected, you can manage the spread of HSV by taking steps to protect yourself and your partner."

    From The Mayo Clinic

    http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/genital-herpes/DS00179

    Please read the entire article-all the pages. If you have ever had skin to skin external genital contact (or even in that general area, like buttocks) with someone you may very well have it but like the majority of people exhibit little or no symptoms.

    -Doug
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 08, 2010 8:08 PM GMT
    Wilton saidI would not date, because it is contagious.


    Haha, almost half of all the men you have dated probably had genital herpes. Prevalence in the gay population is about 40%. In most cases it is asymptomatic.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 08, 2010 8:08 PM GMT
    ASR21 saidHey guys I need advice. I met a guy two weeks ago and we really hit it off. We have been spending a lot time together and it seems we really like each other. Recently he told me he had genital herpes. I'm not sure what to do now. I reacted well and just told him I need time to figure out if I want to become more intimate with him. Of course there are other things to consider....I'm applying for grad school and could be moving in Jan or I may end up staying where I'm at now. anyways....my question is would you date someone with genital herpes? what should I do?



    I WOULD date the guy if you get along,
    I would hold off of sex until consulting a DR
    about IF, WHEN and HOW to safely engage in sex....There are MANY strains of Herpes...chicken pox, Shingles, cold sores, genital herpes, etc...make sure of which strain of herpes you are discussing...... Remember that there is more to a relationship than sex.....

    as resident of Columbus...I know that there are alot of places to go for GREAT Doctors and sexual information.....get educated and informed, don't give up on your new beau...DO BE VIGILANT AND CAREFUL!icon_smile.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 08, 2010 8:17 PM GMT


    ...and please consider this,

    http://bodyandhealth.canada.com/channel_section_details.asp?text_id=1369&channel_id=1020&relation_id=10877

    "These requirements are also met in a variety of contact sports. Herpes simplex virus does not care if sex is happening. Sure, herpes likes sex, but sex is only one type of contact sport that generates heat, moisture, and friction-based skin-to-skin contact. Herpes can be spread during wrestling, rugby, or any other contact sport that exposes a new susceptible host to infectious virus, and thus provides the new environmental opportunities the virus constantly seeks to restart its reproductive cycle in a new host."
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 08, 2010 8:20 PM GMT
    viveutvivas said
    Wilton saidI would not date, because it is contagious.


    Haha, almost half of all the men you have dated probably had genital herpes. Prevalence in the gay population is about 40%. In most cases it is asymptomatic.

    I don't know, perhaps that is true. I must have been lucky, despite my slutty ways, because my doctor tells me I have never been exposed to an STD.

    In fact, she was rather surprised that I showed no antibodies in my blood to ANY STDs, including hepatitis. And she promptly had me vaccinated for that, too..

    I may have been a slut, but I was careful, And maybe just fucking lucky, as well, I dunno. What I do know is that you'll never find a cleaner guy than me. And I intend to stay that way.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 08, 2010 8:22 PM GMT
    Hey Wilton, you could very well have a natural immunity, which is also common.

    Herpes has been around since Hippocrates' time, so I've heard.

    -Doug
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 08, 2010 10:33 PM GMT
    Yes. Because people are more than just their health conditions. Herpes is not always contagious and is a chronic manageable health condition.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 08, 2010 10:34 PM GMT
    major sex crisis, ull be alright bud, herpes isnt that contagious and in most cases u dont even get any symptoms.

    ps: im herpes free and Ive had sex with guys who had it.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 09, 2010 7:35 AM GMT
    Stiletto said
    charlitos saidmajor sex crisis, ull be alright bud, herpes isnt that contagious and in most cases u dont even get any symptoms.

    ps: im herpes free and Ive had sex with guys who had it.



    ^Someone doesn't know that herpes can lay dormant for a number of years
    before it causes an outbreak. More great advice by the one and only Charlitos! icon_rolleyes.gif

    "The herpes virus can lay dormant for various time periods and may be
    in your system for a time period before any symptoms begin to show."
    Link: http://www.herpes-coldsores.com/contracting_herpes.htm



    Ohh shit!!! aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahahahahahahaah!!!!!!!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 09, 2010 7:35 AM GMT
    Stiletto said
    charlitos saidmajor sex crisis, ull be alright bud, herpes isnt that contagious and in most cases u dont even get any symptoms.

    ps: im herpes free and Ive had sex with guys who had it.



    ^Someone doesn't know that herpes can lay dormant for a number of years
    before it causes an outbreak. More great advice by the one and only Charlitos! icon_rolleyes.gif

    "The herpes virus can lay dormant for various time periods and may be
    in your system for a time period before any symptoms begin to show."
    Link: http://www.herpes-coldsores.com/contracting_herpes.htm



    More advice? How about more trolling from anonymous posters.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 09, 2010 8:54 AM GMT
    Education on the subject matter is your greatest defense weapon.