when touching means more...

  • drypin

    Posts: 1798

    Aug 08, 2010 9:34 PM GMT
    So we're at the joint birthday party of a couple of friends last night, sitting around after dinner and chatting. The group I'm chatting with are gay (neither effeminate nor macho, just natural). I'm getting plenty of attention, but I've just joined the group, so it doesn't seem that unusual. Suddenly one of them puts his hand on my arm while telling a story, then lifts it off again fairly quickly.

    Flirting?

    I wasn't that into him, so it's not like I feel I missed an opportunity. Just trying to find back up for my intuition... which tells me it's a flirtatious move.
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    Aug 09, 2010 1:16 AM GMT
    i don't think you need to read that much into it.
  • KepaArg

    Posts: 1721

    Aug 09, 2010 1:20 AM GMT
    i wouldn´ t read into it. For me it´ s normal we are a touchy culture down here, and men gay and straight kiss other men hello and goodbye.
  • LJay

    Posts: 11612

    Aug 09, 2010 1:22 AM GMT
    I wouldn't read much into it, either. Sounds to me like it was a fairly uncomscious move and the guy backed off because he felt he might be giving the wrong signal.
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    Aug 09, 2010 1:28 AM GMT
    American society is so touch phobic, I think we all would feel much better as human beings if we acknowledge each other physically. Even a pat on the shoulder is good.
    HUGS EVERYONE!!! icon_biggrin.gif

    ...unless you stink or you have bad breath or a terrible attitude, then ew im not touching you, skank!
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    Aug 09, 2010 1:37 AM GMT
    how about if a guy comes up behind you while you're sitting down and puts his hands on your shoulders and gives a few squeezes (a mini-massage essentially) to greet you? just a friend being overly friendly right? that's what i told myself.
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    Aug 09, 2010 1:43 AM GMT
    Animated story teller, nothing intended by it. "oh you silly goose (arm pat)"

    North America is way too uptight about this stuff.

    Pretty much anywhere else you get kisses hello and goodbye. It doesn't mean anything other than its intended use of hello or farewell. At least I hope not, man Ive missed out on hundreds of dates!
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    Aug 09, 2010 1:44 AM GMT
    I should have said,


    When its in the bathing suit areas it means more.
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    Aug 09, 2010 2:03 AM GMT
    HTownRunner saidhow about if a guy comes up behind you while you're sitting down and puts his hands on your shoulders and gives a few squeezes (a mini-massage essentially) to greet you? just a friend being overly friendly right? that's what i told myself.


    Hey man, how you doin?

    Wait, I didnt tell you to stop!

    A little to the left, yeah, thats it.

    Now lower...lower....lower...

    Yeah man...aahh....

    icon_wink.gif
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    Aug 09, 2010 3:00 AM GMT
    One of two things:
    1. He felt comfortable enough with you to be physical without being sexual.
    2. He wanted to watch your reaction to see if you might be interested in something sexual, noticed you weren't, and removed his hand.
  • drypin

    Posts: 1798

    Aug 09, 2010 7:04 AM GMT
    MuchMoreThanMuscle saidOh that is easy. By the touch of your arm he was letting you know that he wanted you to give birth to his babies. Should you decide to accept his request you better have birthing hips, otherwise it is a cesarean procedure for you...and you know how men feel about scars "down there." He will no longer find you attractive and will leave you for another man and...um....ahem...what was the question?


    Then he was definitely SOL. Stretch marks on my abdomen? Don't think so.
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    Aug 09, 2010 7:13 AM GMT
    HTownRunner saidhow about if a guy comes up behind you while you're sitting down and puts his hands on your shoulders and gives a few squeezes (a mini-massage essentially) to greet you? just a friend being overly friendly right? that's what i told myself.


    A lot of my close straight friends do that, and they know that I'm gay. It's just a friendly gesture - "hey bud, you look like you had a rough day, let me give you a quick massage" kind of thing.

    When it's real flirting, you'll just know because you won't have enough doubts to post a forum about it.
  • GQjock

    Posts: 11649

    Aug 09, 2010 10:14 AM GMT
    Depends on what he was talking about when he was touching you
    If he was being funny or he was talking about something light and sexy maube
    if he was talking about his back taxes ... not so much
  • drypin

    Posts: 1798

    Aug 09, 2010 10:45 AM GMT
    GQjock saidDepends on what he was talking about when he was touching you
    If he was being funny or he was talking about something light and sexy maube
    if he was talking about his back taxes ... not so much


    LOL! I believe it was a punctuation for the German equivalent of the phrase, "You're gonna love this..." Then he preceded to tell me a funny story about Arnold Schwarzenegger (the convo began about the Prop 8 business).
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    Aug 09, 2010 10:52 AM GMT
    This "straight" guy who was once chatting up my female friend, accosted me outside a bar, grabbed my arse and said, "for guys like you I f*ck like a rabbit".

    I'm not sure if he was flirting or not?