Where are the single guys over 40?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 19, 2008 5:35 PM GMT
    Is it just me and or Dallas area, or is there a decided void of people in their early to mid 40's that are available single type guys?

    I know lots of people that age in relationships but am having a harder time finding single guys that age that want to do things and are available for friendships leading to more.

    Anyone got any ideas on what spaces are fertile for flushing out new friends?
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    Feb 20, 2008 3:02 AM GMT
    I think they all moved to Louisville, Kentucky.
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    Feb 20, 2008 3:12 AM GMT
    Just exactly where are you looking? Most of the keepers are avoiding the bar scene at all costs. Hit the gym or bookstores.
  • bigguysf

    Posts: 329

    Feb 20, 2008 3:19 AM GMT
    Luckydog76 saidJust exactly where are you looking? Most of the keepers are avoiding the bar scene at all costs. Hit the gym or bookstores.

    I agree with Luckydog76. I'm single and 44. Currently not looking, but if I were it definitely wouldn't be going out into the Castro every other night.
    For a guy like me it would definitely be the gym, or at the tennis courts. icon_cool.gif
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    Feb 20, 2008 3:57 AM GMT
    <-----right here.
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    Feb 21, 2008 3:04 PM GMT
    Almost all of my friends (in our 40s) seem to meet guys while we're working out, running, swimming laps, playing tennis, cycling groups, raquet ball courts, work settings, alumni association events, football and basketball games - really! I'm speaking from pers. exp. here! Not all guys in our 40s are taken - some of us just can't seem to get along with a guy for more than say - three years!
  • in773guy

    Posts: 89

    Feb 21, 2008 3:09 PM GMT
    Uhm... "Hi"
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    Feb 21, 2008 3:42 PM GMT
    WELL HELL !!!! I'M OVER THE LIMIT AGAIN !!!!! LOL !!!!!!
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Feb 21, 2008 3:49 PM GMT
    PupDog saidIs it just me and or Dallas area, or is there a decided void of people in their early to mid 40's that are available single type guys?

    I know lots of people that age in relationships but am having a harder time finding single guys that age that want to do things and are available for friendships leading to more.

    Anyone got any ideas on what spaces are fertile for flushing out new friends?




    Interesting thread.. A couple of points.. You almost incorporate a "mix of goals" ... and various men may be in conflict with your ultimate goal.

    You mention friends... I'm always up for good, grounded friends, single or otherwise... but I have a bf... there may be others that are single and have no desire for "more" and then finally there may be those who are single or in a relationship who don't care about any friendship, they just want sex.

    The ideas some of the others have conveyed are good. I certainly don't hang out in bars much.. gyms, bookstores, social groups are good. I'd tend to approach it all (can I use the word "laidback") and
    focus on quality men for friendships.. if those are single guys, maybe you will get your bonus... if not at least you can expand your social circle.
  • SoDakGuy

    Posts: 1862

    Feb 21, 2008 4:05 PM GMT
    Where are the single guys over 40?

    I slept w/ most of the hot ones! icon_twisted.gif
  • jarhead5536

    Posts: 1348

    Feb 21, 2008 4:20 PM GMT
    As a guy over 40 (though no longer single), I have long observed the phenomenon of thin ranks in my age group and older. Having lived through the worst of the AIDS crisis in the 80's, I finally told myself that most of the eligble men in my age group did not survive the epidemic. Remember a person my age (43) was 17 in 1981, just coming out, starting to have sex, and blissfully unaware that anything wrong was about to happen.

    I watched 28 close friends die by 1990, and I don't think I'm alone in that experience.

    On a lighter note, there are plenty of hot hot hot men over 40 on this very site, and it's great to see
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    Feb 21, 2008 4:38 PM GMT
    A Great Thread!!! As a man over 40 and single--again. I would like to meet some men ----for fun -friendship--play golf--go hiking--gym buddy. But finding them is a challange to me. I guess you have to reley on friends to help you find them. The guys I have met here are great people---wish they were here. Is there an over 40 gay site?

    JJ
  • rock924228

    Posts: 431

    Feb 21, 2008 4:41 PM GMT
    Way over....ta-dah!
  • gitno

    Posts: 4

    Feb 24, 2008 7:22 AM GMT
    U don't have 2 look 2 far my friend.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 24, 2008 7:39 AM GMT
    Present and availableicon_smile.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 26, 2008 1:54 AM GMT
    right here
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 26, 2008 2:12 AM GMT
    SoDakGuy saidWhere are the single guys over 40?

    I slept w/ most of the hot ones! icon_twisted.gif

    It's a good thing you qualified that with "MOST"icon_wink.gif
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    Feb 28, 2008 8:51 PM GMT
    I just read the original question and the many responses.

    As a single man, I have asked myself that same question.

    I am not looking for casual hook-ups, although we all have sexual needs, but I am finding it increasingly difficult to find someone who is like minded and interested in a relationship. I am not inexperienced in relationships, my last relationship regretfully ended after being together for 17 yrs... and it broke my heart.

    Maybe I am trying to hard? Maybe I have set my expectations to high? Maybe I am just not looking in the right places.

    Here's the dilemma, I dont live in the "gay village" ...but I do live within 20 minutes by car. I am not really into the club scene, although I love club music. I have a gym membership at Premier (http://www.premierfitness.ca/) but they dont have any clubs in the area of the village.

    I am only into masculine, muscular dudes. So what are my options? Only serious replies please.

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    Feb 28, 2008 8:59 PM GMT
    SoDakGuy saidWhere are the single guys over 40?

    I slept w/ most of the hot ones! icon_twisted.gif


    that's not something to brag about hunny. That just means you're a slut.icon_rolleyes.gif
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    Feb 28, 2008 9:08 PM GMT
    I find that a lot of gay men over 40 that are single have a tendency to become more invisible. They don't go to bars as much, they participate less in social activities, etc.. Perhaps they don't feel as physically attractive and just find the singles scene more uncomfortable.

    If I was single I would probably join the "out & out club" in Toronto. It seems to attract guys that are 40+. It is a club that is dedicated to camping, recreational sports, indoor board games, etc..
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 28, 2008 9:56 PM GMT
    I'm single but not by choice. icon_sad.gif
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    Feb 28, 2008 10:06 PM GMT
    Let me know if any of the single guys have moved to Minnesota! Also: It would be great if they are single and not "old men." Seems like a lot of guys turn into old men once they hit 40 -- stop working out, having fun, enjoying life, experiencing new things....
  • dhinkansas

    Posts: 764

    Feb 28, 2008 10:11 PM GMT
    I think of how people over forty in the office seem, and try not to be so old and set in my ways as them. I may revert back to 1980 or my youth and refer to someone as a fox from time to time...but there are 30 year olds at work that seem 100. I tell myself it's a state of mind...but I do have that moment where I stand in the mirror and see my dad of my youth staring back at me. I just try to roll with it. I'd rather be me than look like some of the Hollywood celebs fighting the aging process. So I don't know where the over 40 and single people are. If I did, I'd write a book, go on Oprah, make millions. We are around, but people probably just don't notice.
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    Feb 29, 2008 11:20 AM GMT
    You are looking at the wrong places !

    Ha ha ha.icon_exclaim.gif


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    Mar 01, 2008 4:11 PM GMT
    I've seen and met hot guys occasionally just doing normal things - like working out; running; swimming laps; and at small, health-food grocery stores buying their produce and stuff. Also, if you have a friendly dog, those same upscale grocery stores usually have outdoor cafe style tables for you to relax and drink a smoothy. Guys will want to talk to you, and they'll feel very comfortable using the dog as an ice breaker. Try it! I promise you it works! "Hey man, what kind of dog is that? Is she/he friendly?" Or they might say, "Hey, that drink looks good, do they make those here?" And if a hot guy says something like, "Hey, you look like you're in really good shape! How can I get legs like that?" well, then you know the guy has great taste in men!