BF best friend in love with him?

  • anysound

    Posts: 11

    Sep 08, 2010 1:26 PM GMT
    She's 21 and never had a boyfriend and my bf is practically her only friend.
    They celebrated their "7th year friendship anniversary today" which included him buying her a bracelet and going out for dinner - which is fine.

    But the thing is apparently she "hates me".
    I've never met her in the entire 7 month relationship (he has met my friends).
    He actually said she "hates me". I'm sure it stems from jealousy/insecurity - probably thinks I'm going to take him away from her etc.

    I don't know how to handle the situation.
    I asked him a few weeks ago "so am I ever gonna meet her" and he just flippantly said "yeah.."

    She has him quite a bit whipped as well, like if she wants to go somewhere or so something he pretty much will NEVER say no.

    It's like a relationship without the intimacy.

    Has anyone ever had a situation like this?
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    Sep 08, 2010 1:40 PM GMT
    I think you need to meet her and put that bitch straight on a few things! icon_eek.gif

    How can she hate you having never met you? Issues.... she probably thinks eventually she will turn your BF and you are the only fly in the ointment preventing her getting her wicked way. Make sure you don't see her alone and you've hidden all sharp and flammable items!
  • rnch

    Posts: 11524

    Sep 08, 2010 1:45 PM GMT
    is the "girlfriend" a female..or another guy?

    after all, the OP has never met "her"......
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    Sep 08, 2010 4:11 PM GMT
    I had a similar experience except I met her and she was a bitch to me because of what I represented to her. It eventually didn't work out with the guy I was dating, but I handled her by completely ignoring her when we socialized. We'd be in the same room for hours and not even look at each other.

    You've got to tell your boyfriend how it makes you feel. Ultimately, you have to have the priority. Friends are a dime dozen in the gay world especially female friends, but a good romantic partner is next to impossible to find. Her young age speaks to how inexperienced she is with relationships in general and you just have to "give it to" the young ones sometimes for them to learn.
  • owen19832006

    Posts: 1035

    Sep 08, 2010 4:19 PM GMT
    what the hell!! the bitch hates you and hasnt even met you?! make sure shes an actual lass!
    and i would not have waited 7 months to meet the so called best friend...i meet them in the first few months, especially if they go out and have nights out and stuff...
    i even organized a party at my flat for all his friends, so i could get to know them well...theres one i cannot stand and i made it clear to my bf, and the fact that he got drunk in the party, was rude to lots of the other guests and particularly to me in my own house, i said to the bf i do not want to see, hear, or speak to that man. you meet him if you want to, but not in my house.
    needless to say the bf had a chat with him, and ever since then their friendship went from warm to cool to cold to artic cold...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 08, 2010 4:22 PM GMT
    What about this makes you feel that your boyfriend is honoring you in the way he should?

    Why do people put up with so much crap? I'd gladly choose to be on my own than have a boyfriend who's comfortable being involved with someone so selfish, hurtful and childish! Come on! Seriously...icon_rolleyes.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 08, 2010 4:22 PM GMT

    Looking at the other two threads you started, I would say you're one or more of the following: paranoid, suspicious, insecure, possessive, immature, and/or a story-teller.


    http://www.realjock.com/gayforums/1053453/

    http://www.realjock.com/gayforums/990116/


  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 08, 2010 4:25 PM GMT
    sea0498l.jpg
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    Sep 08, 2010 4:26 PM GMT
    DjDorchester said
    Looking at the other two threads you started, I would say you're one or more of the following: paranoid, suspicious, insecure, possessive, immature, and/or a story-teller.


    http://www.realjock.com/gayforums/1053453/

    http://www.realjock.com/gayforums/990116/




    Boy that paints a different picture , doesn't it... Maybe the problem is within and she has a reason to be put off by you.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 08, 2010 4:28 PM GMT
    GFORCE said
    DjDorchester said
    Looking at the other two threads you started, I would say you're one or more of the following: paranoid, suspicious, insecure, possessive, immature, and/or a story-teller.


    http://www.realjock.com/gayforums/1053453/

    http://www.realjock.com/gayforums/990116/




    Boy that paints a different picture , doesn't it... Maybe the problem is within and she has a reason to be put off by you.



    And on both of those threads, he never posted again despite many replies. So to my list I add this possibility: Fake.

  • owen19832006

    Posts: 1035

    Sep 08, 2010 4:30 PM GMT
    oh this paints a different picture altogether! he just needs help. very sad case
  • anysound

    Posts: 11

    Sep 08, 2010 5:13 PM GMT
    LOL. What are you talking about?
    Those posts were made when I was unsure of our relationship.
    We didn't have an official title and it always made me insecure.
    We've since sorted that out and now are official bf.
    Yes, I was overly paranoid/suspicious and now I don't care who he hangs out with. I trust him completely.

    It still doesn't change the fact the friend HATES ME - the words HE used.

    I'm starting to think we are never going to meet, despite the fact I've been alluding to wanting to meet her.

    I invite him to have dinner with my friends etc but he never does the same.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 08, 2010 6:04 PM GMT
    I think she is scared of you that you will take her only friend...she is afraid of being left alone.That is why she hates you even without knowing you in person, but knowing you as her best friend's bf.

    But i agree to the fact that you start expecting more intimacy with the person you are in a relationship with. Since you are in a relationship, you too have every right to ask your bf out...Unless and until this "special time between you and your BF" is not getting affected and your intimacy when you both are alone...else do what feels right to you