Why are gay guys such flakes?

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    Sep 10, 2010 9:50 PM GMT
    I met this guy online a couple of weeks ago. He said he wanted to meet me right then, I advised him that I was busy putting up my small business and did not have the time, was being honest and not blowing him off (was hoping to do that later LOL) We exchange pictures, he seemed interested. We just exchange phone numbers and were ready to meet at Starbucks tomorrow at 10:00a.m. and then just two minutes ago, he could not remember me... asked for my pictures again and then said ' We were not a match now. icon_evil.gif and apologize for the confusion. Why could not he just had said that a couple weeks ago? Why waste my time, with all sort of emails, and string me along?

    It is getting so discouraging dating guys. I am putting myself out there, and I do not think I grotesque, and I am not a model...but gosh...Any encouraging advise would be appreciate it.icon_cry.gif
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    Sep 10, 2010 10:45 PM GMT
    Start from the premise that they are all flakes and won't be disappointed (or wrong).

    Anyone who says he wants to meet you right away, it means he wants to meet for sex and that's it. As soon as you clicked off that night, he forgot about you.

    And don't do 90,000,000 emails with some dude before meeting. He should want to meet up in a decent interval of time and so should you. That many emails and somebody isn't serious...or too busy... Either way forget about it.

    Don't ever inconvenience yourself. Make all first meetings at a place and time convenient for you. I like to meet at the cafe in a Barnes and Noble's five minutes from my house. I like books, so I can always enjoy looking at the new arrivals, even if he doesn't show.

    But dont feel bad about yourself. Look at all the gods incarnate on here that are still single. That totally baffles me.
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    Sep 10, 2010 10:57 PM GMT
    Just be glad you didn't go to Starbucks and wait on a no-show.
    I don't consider someone a flake until a few minutes after the first scheduled meet.
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    Sep 10, 2010 11:42 PM GMT
    Nothing encouraging to say short of a lie of sugar coating. It's just how it is. A guy can tell you that you mean the world to him and the next day he'll never speak to you again. And it's just how it is.
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    Sep 11, 2010 12:17 AM GMT
    It's good that he showed you what he is like right up front. You're actually lucky.
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    Sep 11, 2010 12:23 AM GMT
    Ciarsolo saidNothing encouraging to say short of a lie of sugar coating. It's just how it is. A guy can tell you that you mean the world to him and the next day he'll never speak to you again. And it's just how it is.


    sad but true. if you assume 1 out of 10 guys is gay you gotta assume that 9 out 10 of that ten percent are flakes
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    Sep 11, 2010 1:02 AM GMT
    uombroca saidI met this guy online a couple of weeks ago. He said he wanted to meet me right then, I advised him that I was busy putting up my small business and did not have the time, was being honest and not blowing him off (was hoping to do that later LOL) We exchange pictures, he seemed interested. We just exchange phone numbers and were ready to meet at Starbucks tomorrow at 10:00a.m. and then just two minutes ago, he could not remember me... asked for my pictures again and then said ' We were not a match now. icon_evil.gif and apologize for the confusion. Why could not he just had said that a couple weeks ago? Why waste my time, with all sort of emails, and string me along?

    It is getting so discouraging dating guys. I am putting myself out there, and I do not think I grotesque, and I am not a model...but gosh...Any encouraging advise would be appreciate it.icon_cry.gif


    If you're going online you'll want to insist on web cam and phone BEFORE doing anything in person, just to see how truthful they're being. If you can't get a first name, a last name, and the aforementioned, get rid of them.

    Don't ever bother with picture-less / profile-less. They simply have way to many issues, whatever they might be.

    It's important to use good judgment when screening folks. Don't blame others if you have to have a screening process, don't use sound judgment, or act on whims. Remember: you control YOUR selection process.
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    Sep 11, 2010 1:03 AM GMT
    Caslon15000 saidStart from the premise that they are all flakes and won't be disappointed (or wrong).

    Anyone who says he wants to meet you right away, it means he wants to meet for sex and that's it. As soon as you clicked off that night, he forgot about you.

    And don't do 90,000,000 emails with some dude before meeting. He should want to meet up in a decent interval of time and so should you. That many emails and somebody isn't serious...or too busy... Either way forget about it.

    Don't ever inconvenience yourself. Make all first meetings at a place and time convenient for you. I like to meet at the cafe in a Barnes and Noble's five minutes from my house. I like books, so I can always enjoy looking at the new arrivals, even if he doesn't show.

    But dont feel bad about yourself. Look at all the gods incarnate on here that are still single. That totally baffles me.


    LOL.

    The saying goes: "Lower your expectations; you'll be happier." LOL.

    Best to have in place a sound screening process and hard rules about what causes a rejection.
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    Sep 11, 2010 1:17 AM GMT
    Thanks, guys.

    I am just went out to take care of some CPA tax business, and its a shame that you are all right sometimes it just per mutates to sex...in regards to the meeting place actually it was a compromise of half way distance between our two cities, so I think he was sincere in meeting since we did compromise on that. Although, when I suggested a first Starbucks, he shot it down and asked for a second location for better parking, but then found out that it was actually closer to his 24 hr Gym location since he wanted to workout early in the morning and the meet me (that should have given me some clue)...

    thanks for the words of encouragement...I guess will have to increase my screen process...I am bit new to this coming out just two years ago...so a newbie here but making head ways.
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    Sep 11, 2010 3:20 AM GMT
    Caslon15000 saidStart from the premise that they are all flakes and won't be disappointed (or wrong).


    But dont feel bad about yourself. Look at all the gods incarnate on here that are still single. That totally baffles me.


    Perfect example of why so many gay guys are single.

    Gay guys are fucked up.

    Gay guys are flakes.

    very good advice you have given to the OP