Only out on realjock?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 15, 2010 7:13 PM GMT
    Is there any1 on here that isnt out to their friends or family but has pics of themselves on realjock??

    Curious coz im not out and too afraid to put up pics incase someone I know sees them.

    And yes that would make them gay for being on this site but they might be out and I dont want them to know bout me!!

    Anyone that brave?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 15, 2010 8:11 PM GMT
    Im only out to my straight best friend http://www.realjock.com/gayforums/1131627/

    Im not out to anyone else at the moment. But just keep your profile private. Im finally starting to not care about people knowing. Im not any different than I would be.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 15, 2010 8:12 PM GMT
    If someone finds you on here, they very likely would be gay too. Now you have something in common.

    Throw caution to the wind! Enjoy life!

  • Delivis

    Posts: 2332

    Sep 15, 2010 8:16 PM GMT
    Is it possible to *not* be out on a gay dating site?
  • Geoedward

    Posts: 657

    Sep 15, 2010 8:16 PM GMT
    Hey buddy, One step at a time. You can come out to more people when you are ready. You will know when it is right. Take your time.
  • Ironman4U

    Posts: 738

    Sep 15, 2010 8:20 PM GMT
    I realize that we all have our own process to go through to be ready to "come out," but I think I can speak for most of the guys who have done it...be yourself and move forward in your life. Being in the closet is not living a complete life.

    That doesn't mean you have to jump to the front of the parade line either. Just accept yourself, be yourself and the people in your life that matter will adjust (just like you).

    You'll find that many guys on here won't respond to faceless or pic-less profiles simply because they have no interest in living in or associating themselves with others who cannot be man enough to live openly and freely.

    Good luck. There are lots of guys who can give you specific advice on the whats and hows of coming out. The important thing is that you figure out what will work for you and you do it.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 15, 2010 9:16 PM GMT
    I'm not out yet and don't plan on coming out for a bit...still have some self-acceptance issues and biases I need to correct about homosexuality before I feel comfortable telling people. That being said, with every day I'm getting more comfortable with being romantic with a guy, and sexually...well, let's just say that isn't even remotely an issue anymore.

    I'm out on this site with a picture, but you'd have to be a member who is logged in to see it (otherwise I'm hidden). I figure if anybody I know comes across my pic, well then it's almost definite they're gay and we could go from there...how sick would that be, finding out that one of my "straight" buddies is actually gay?? Hah gives me some nice things to think about...

    Good luck man, it took me awhile to realize and admit to myself that I'm into dudes, and it's great that you've gotten to that stage.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 15, 2010 9:18 PM GMT
    me icon_smile.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 15, 2010 9:30 PM GMT
    Include me in this group.

    I set my profile to private and only member can see it while signed on. It sucks because I cheat myself out of MOtD but like someone said above one step at a time. Come out to your friends/family when you choose. It's your life no one else, can/will live it.
  • Fritter

    Posts: 1696

    Sep 15, 2010 9:46 PM GMT
    Yes I'm in this group too, believe it or not. I'm of the thought that if anyone I know sees me here they must be gay too! I guess this could be a first step towards full comming out. I have fun here anyway
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 15, 2010 9:49 PM GMT
    Yep! Pretty much, although I am dating gay guys...

    And I should add, that in a way I'm kind of hoping to be caught out....
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 15, 2010 9:54 PM GMT
    Same, not ready to out myself to the whole world just yet..
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 15, 2010 10:27 PM GMT
    not out to the world, only to family and friends that count, oh wait, all the friends are gay on real jock..........course i'm at the point that after fighting with myself for 58 years, i really don't give a fuck anymore who knows if i'm gay, straight or like large chickens.....ewww.....Keithicon_cool.gif
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    Sep 15, 2010 10:29 PM GMT
    Irish89 saidIs there any1 on here that isnt out to their friends or family but has pics of themselves on realjock??

    Curious coz im not out and too afraid to put up pics incase someone I know sees them.

    And yes that would make them gay for being on this site but they might be out and I dont want them to know bout me!!

    Anyone that brave?

    Anything you post on RJ can be found via Google. So they dont have to be on here to find you.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 15, 2010 10:35 PM GMT
    You don't have to be gay to be on this site- but if you are looking to hook-up I would at least upload a body shot- or else most people won't even bother to reply. icon_confused.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 15, 2010 10:41 PM GMT
    Caslon15000 saidAnything you post on here can be found via Google. So they dont have to be on here to find you.



    It was through a search for something else that I discovered Real Jock with one of the forums here being a search result.


    I do not mind having my profile open for everyone to see. My family, friends, neighbors and coworkers all know I am gay. No reason to hide it. Being 44 and with no wife or girlfriend, I think it would be suspected by most intelligent people who knew me.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 15, 2010 10:54 PM GMT
    Yes, I'm also only "out" at Realjock, although since I was at school (back in the 1960s) quite a number of boys in my class sensed that I was gay and were quite hostile to it. This continued right up to the present day, which is more than forty years of being looked at from the corner of the eye, and being the subject of whispering behind my back. Yet nowadays nobody dares come up to me to confront me on the matter - they find it much safer just to leg it.
    Yet I have been called a coward right here at RealJock for admitting my refusal to join a Gay Pride march near to where I live.
    Fortunately, I have a hide of a rhinoceros, I simply take these things as they come. All part of life.
    On the top of your Realjock page you have a "Preferences" prompt. By clicking this, you have the option to choose, "Profile viewed by signed in members only". This means that you are hidden from the general public, and any of your posts will appear under "Hidden Member". If someone further down quotes your post, then your username appears. This is why when you first register, you are advised to choose a screen name, and not use your real name. Like this, the public won't be able to identify who you are.
    Good luck.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 15, 2010 10:57 PM GMT
    Don't worry, I'm only out on here too icon_lol.gif

    Yeah I wouldn't want people to find me on here but if they do, at least it would save me from telling them lol.
  • hikerC

    Posts: 170

    Sep 15, 2010 11:55 PM GMT
    I WAS only out on RealJock, at first I was reluctant to post a picture for the same reasons you are, but then I saw some profiles of men I wanted to get to know, so I posted a facepic. As I got more comfortable here I posted more pictures.

    I got so comfortable here that I finally posted my main profile pic. It is because of the friends I made here and the confidence I gained here that I finally came out. I have known a few gay guys over the years and I wondered if they would recognize me here. Now that they know I am gay and we have been talking about stuff, I found out that they have never even heard of RealJock.

    It was all about babysteps, take your time and enjoy this site and one day you WILL want to post your picture. Then you will get more comfortable here and with who you are. Good luck! icon_wink.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 16, 2010 12:13 AM GMT
    Just take it one step at a time, post a pic where you cant totally see your face if you'd like, then as you get to know the site and the people on here (pretty cool people i must add) you'll feel more confident. I posted pics just recently it feels great.
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    Sep 16, 2010 12:19 AM GMT
    Irish89 saidAnyone that brave?

    Or foolhardy, if you're not out. I was linked to one of my own posts here during a Google search. Had I not selected the RJ account preference to block my pics from non-members, I presume my main pic would have been viewable. Plus my screen name seen as well, a reason not to use any part of your real name. Nor give too many identifiable personal details in these posts.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 16, 2010 12:30 AM GMT
    To the OP. Come out at your own pace but realize that, in general, life is SO much easier if you are out. Good luck to you.
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Sep 16, 2010 12:33 AM GMT
    There are people who know about me and some who don't. If someone found out because of my pics on this site (and they were male).. I'd turn the tables and ask them about what they were DOING looking at my pics on RJ....LOL

    And at some point, life is worth living. Sure, I'd rather my professional clients not see my pics here, but if one did.... such is life.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 16, 2010 12:35 AM GMT
    I dunno, I never felt compelled to come out... I just live my life and then people I meet along the way finally catch on and are like... "oh you're gay?" and I just tell them sure as hell am. Coming out conversations are always awkward... I had a few when I came out to my brother and friends though, hated every one of 'em haha.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 16, 2010 1:02 AM GMT
    Maybe I should start making face pics my main pic. icon_redface.gif