WTF! he replied my message, but what does it mean???

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 20, 2010 5:25 AM GMT
    Thanks everyone for replying to my previous post, it really helps a lot!

    http://www.realjock.com/gayforums/1148025

    A brief recap of what happened:

    Last Saturday:
    hook up online, met and had a good time

    This Friday:
    Sent over a short msg asking if he'd like to meet again. No reply

    This Saturday:
    Sent over a long msg telling him I had a good time and would like to meet again. No reply.
    Sent over a third msg asking him to give me an explicit rejection if he is not interested anymore or else I might call him (which of course I did not)





    That's what happened during the past days. Yes, I really made myself seem desperate and behaved like a stalker. So I decide to move on.

    But then on Sunday I received this msg from him:





    'well i went out with my friends last night - most of saturday was spent sleeping and then out again saturday night... so sunday will be a day of sleeping too....

    as for meeting again, let's see. was fun sure, wasn't actually thinking u would want to do it again'






    Huh?

    What exactly does 'let's see' mean? I explicitly asked for a straightforward rejection and this obviously is not, but it does not sound like a yes either!

    And what is the 'I did not expect you'd want to do it again'? Is he actually saying he does not want to do it again?

    WTF is this? As if the ignore treatment is not bad enough and now the vague msg treatment is even worse, if anyone understands how I feel...

    Should I contact this person again? Or should I wait for his further contact?


  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 20, 2010 11:12 AM GMT
    He is simply saying when he will be horny he will get in touch with you but might not be interested in anything more.
  • MrNomis

    Posts: 268

    Sep 20, 2010 11:13 AM GMT
    " he's just not that into you " sorry move on dude!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 20, 2010 11:26 AM GMT
    NO
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 20, 2010 11:34 AM GMT
    I think you were just told that was a one-off.

    Your only play left, (seriously impaired by your stalker msgs lol) is to say you thought it was really nice and remind him he has your contact details if he wants to meet again.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 20, 2010 11:34 AM GMT
    Arrgh I hate things like this, and I have experienced similar in the past!

    I would reply just to say "Yeah it would be fun to hook up again, maybe ------?" and name an actual date. If he blows you off then forget it.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 20, 2010 11:58 AM GMT

    I think you threw the ball in his court, he caught it and walked away. He'll be back if he wants to play ball again... meanwhile, you should forget it and move on.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 20, 2010 12:04 PM GMT
    After your heartfelt messages all you get is "let's see?"
    It can only mean "If there are absolutely no other options and I'm helplessly horny maybe I'll message you."
    Why waste a particle of mental energy on this guy?
  • jlly_rnchr

    Posts: 1759

    Sep 20, 2010 12:10 PM GMT
    He's a flake, don't waste your time.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 20, 2010 12:17 PM GMT
    Welcome to the wonderfully flaky world of the homosexual male.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 20, 2010 12:28 PM GMT
    You hooked up with this guy once, you guys agreed it was just a hook up and nothing else apparently. If you wanned something serious with him then probably it shouldn't have started with that concept.

    However if you want to pursue this any further you dont write long messages let alone repeatedly. You simply send him ONE text inviting him to the movies, restaurant, coffee, bar, whatever place you can relax and have a conversation with this guy. That is your chance to get to know each other's personalities better. Trust me it is easier to accept a dinner invitation than trying to make sense of long message where probably the receiver doesn't even feel the same way the sender does.

    Seriously if I were him and I start getting a bunch of messages from someone I just hooked up with. I would think you are immature, and a potential stalker.

    He replied telling you he is gonna be very busy, if he were interested at all he would have at least told you which day he wont be so occupied. It is pretty obvious he doesnt want anything with you. So relax, this one you screwed up, learn from it move on and dont repeat the same mistakes on your next one.

    Good luck
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 20, 2010 12:57 PM GMT
    awwww... icon_cry.gif
  • MuscleComeBac...

    Posts: 2376

    Sep 20, 2010 1:08 PM GMT
    Bucko....

    It goes like this: You are playing the game the way you see it played by others, being cool, doing the hook-up, having fun. Then you have this crazy dangerous part that perks up it's head and starts to intervene - the passionate, loving, unpretentious, quite possibly human and vulnerable side that wants something more and has integrity. He, on the other hand, is simply playing the game and avoiding all the above.

    So, "let's see" is his way of saying that he doesn't know what the fuck to do with someone who has real feelings and is looking for more than empty objectification. Sex as a way of connecting more deeply and stirring up real excitement scares the shit out of him, and he banged into you by chance - and now you wanting to bang back reminds him that he's just playing a game and he has no intention of connecting "again" with anyone like you.

    You're too good to waste time on this kind of emotionally retarded boy. Move on to men and find something with real possibility. Continuing to text him is like trying to convince yourself that playing Monopoly is the same as investing in a 401K. You're money - he's "play money" at best. Move on.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 20, 2010 1:10 PM GMT
    Lets see, you came off as a total stalker. He knows he can booty text you anytime now and you will respond. Forget about him and move on.
  • SpikeJock

    Posts: 51

    Sep 20, 2010 2:04 PM GMT
    For all the reaons everyone has already said, just move on.

    This guy isn't that into you. Isn't looking for more than a hookup. Has a lifestyle of club,sleep,club,sleep which isn't condusive to a relationship. He's too busy to reply to a message and unwilling to make a plan plus he's vague.

    Pursuing this guy is only going to bring you frustration. Move on, don't even repy to his message, it's pointless; anything more will seem desperate and even more stalkerish. Find someone else, he can't be all that.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 20, 2010 3:16 PM GMT
    OK, got it. I will move on.

    I just don't get people anymore. If he's not interested, why reply at all? If he wants to give a rejection, why not give it straightforward as I explicitly requested?

    'It's fun and let's see?' Huh, just WTF is on his mind...

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 20, 2010 3:24 PM GMT
    fucked and chucked.
    been there- (once-- heheheh)
    not fun but you get over it quickly
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 20, 2010 3:29 PM GMT
    MuscleComeBack saidBucko....

    It goes like this: You are playing the game the way you see it played by others, being cool, doing the hook-up, having fun. Then you have this crazy dangerous part that perks up it's head and starts to intervene - the passionate, loving, unpretentious, quite possibly human and vulnerable side that wants something more and has integrity. He, on the other hand, is simply playing the game and avoiding all the above.

    So, "let's see" is his way of saying that he doesn't know what the fuck to do with someone who has real feelings and is looking for more than empty objectification. Sex as a way of connecting more deeply and stirring up real excitement scares the shit out of him, and he banged into you by chance - and now you wanting to bang back reminds him that he's just playing a game and he has no intention of connecting "again" with anyone like you.

    You're too good to waste time on this kind of emotionally retarded boy. Move on to men and find something with real possibility. Continuing to text him is like trying to convince yourself that playing Monopoly is the same as investing in a 401K. You're money - he's "play money" at best. Move on.


    Great advice and right on the money
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    Sep 20, 2010 3:33 PM GMT
    McD_1111 saidThanks everyone for replying to my previous post, it really helps a lot!

    http://www.realjock.com/gayforums/1148025

    A brief recap of what happened:

    Last Saturday:
    hook up online, met and had a good time

    This Friday:
    Sent over a short msg asking if he'd like to meet again. No reply

    This Saturday:
    Sent over a long msg telling him I had a good time and would like to meet again. No reply.
    Sent over a third msg asking him to give me an explicit rejection if he is not interested anymore or else I might call him (which of course I did not)





    That's what happened during the past days. Yes, I really made myself seem desperate and behaved like a stalker. So I decide to move on.

    But then on Sunday I received this msg from him:





    'well i went out with my friends last night - most of saturday was spent sleeping and then out again saturday night... so sunday will be a day of sleeping too....

    as for meeting again, let's see. was fun sure, wasn't actually thinking u would want to do it again'






    Huh?

    What exactly does 'let's see' mean? I explicitly asked for a straightforward rejection and this obviously is not, but it does not sound like a yes either!

    And what is the 'I did not expect you'd want to do it again'? Is he actually saying he does not want to do it again?

    WTF is this? As if the ignore treatment is not bad enough and now the vague msg treatment is even worse, if anyone understands how I feel...

    Should I contact this person again? Or should I wait for his further contact?




    Jeeze. Get some fucking class. Pick up the phone and call the guy. Oh, wait, you're a closet pictureless and don't even know his name, right? Does that seem dysfunctional to you? The guy failed to respond on a timely basis, so, you then send him a demand message without any level of patience. Does that seem dysfunctional to you? Immature, childish, perhaps? If he's blows you off, who would blame him? If you wanted to communicate with the guy dial the phone, and ask him, and leave it at that. If he doesn't respond then, either something happened to him, or he's just not that into you and is rude. Either way, there's not a thing you can do about it and laying out demands make you look like a 2 year old. Grow up.
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    Sep 20, 2010 3:36 PM GMT
    southbankguy saidLets see, you came off as a total stalker. He knows he can booty text you anytime now and you will respond. Forget about him and move on.


    and honestly... if he ever does text you late at night wanting some... i'd say no!
    might increase your desirability. i've been in a somewhat similar position where i felt i was the fool and they felt they had power over me... so when they came back i decided i didn't want it bad enough to feel degraded and like someone else's toy to play with or toss whenever they pleased. not really what i'm looking for, not what i'm looking to be. he's just one guy, he can't be important enough to lose respect for yourself.

    there'll be plenty more guys! trust me
  • LJay

    Posts: 11612

    Sep 20, 2010 3:53 PM GMT
    Well, now he has you in his "little black book" and may call you sometime, or not.

    You should probably treat it casually. If you happen to think of him sometime, get in touch but don't sit on the edge of your seat waiting for something to happen. Maybe suggest a coffee meetup or lunch to take the pressure of commitment off.

    The point here is to treat simple things as simple things. Not every situation has to be complicated.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 20, 2010 4:02 PM GMT
    Chin up and Move on mate.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 20, 2010 4:38 PM GMT
    At first blush I would say, “You’re not the exception; you’re the rule”.
    However the comment about “I did not expect you'd want to o it again” strikes me funny too.
    Did he think you were a player too?
    Did he think you had an awful date?
    I had a date once that I felt was horrible: his attention was on every other guy in the restaurant and at the theater he set one seat over. I kissed him goodnight (on the cheek as he pulled away);still no prince…oh well…NEXT.
    The next day he is calling me saying how much fun he had and wanting to go out again…wtf.
    I was immature, making up a lame excuse and chose to ignore his continued attention, thinking his idea of fun was on a different plane then mine.
  • coolarmydude

    Posts: 9190

    Sep 20, 2010 5:11 PM GMT
    "Should I contact this person again? Or should I wait for his further contact?"


    You should email him one last time and tell him that he's right. You don't want to sleep with him again. That will turn the tables on the douche. And just leave him with that.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 20, 2010 6:15 PM GMT
    The easy quick advice:

    Quit wasting your time.



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