Long Term Relationships - How Many Out There?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 21, 2010 3:26 PM GMT
    I know the LTR topic has been taken around the block, but in my short time here and in really taking a look at the gay male, it appears to me that the great majority of men are still seeking that elusive LTR and i wonder why, compared with the straight world.

    So here is the simple question:

    HOW MANY OF YOU HAVE BEEN IN A CONTINUOUS LTR FOR OVER 10 YEARS AND TO WHAT DO YOU ATTRITBUTE THAT SUCCESS?....Keithicon_cool.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 21, 2010 3:29 PM GMT
    21 years. The secret to our success is a dash of motor-oil behind each ear in the morning.

    OK srsly. Never forgetting what we first saw in each other.
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    Sep 22, 2010 5:18 AM GMT
    10 in December…my how the time has flown; no, real secret he loves me and I love him and we tell each other how much, each day; even if it is just by the way we pass each other; bodies touching, while getting ready for work.
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    Sep 22, 2010 5:21 AM GMT
    8 years!!!!!!!!!!!
    but my bf was dead with an car crash
    31.05.2009
    was the men of my life
    but now alone

    no car crash then i have this men all times

    ( sorry my english is bad i know )

    BUT I LIKE RJ!!!!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 22, 2010 5:38 AM GMT
    I had a the same fuck buddy for 13 years. Does that count? It was on and off, whenever I had a boyfriend or was in a relationship it was off. and when I was single it was on.
  • BlackBeltGuy

    Posts: 2609

    Sep 22, 2010 5:45 AM GMT
    bajano said8 years!!!!!!!!!!!
    but my bf was dead with an car crash
    31.05.2009
    was the men of my life
    but now alone

    no car crash then i have this men all times

    ( sorry my english is bad i know )

    BUT I LIKE RJ!!!!


    so sorry buddy. i did a 5 year and 12 year.
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    Sep 22, 2010 6:24 AM GMT
    bajano said8 years!!!!!!!!!!!
    but my bf was dead with an car crash
    31.05.2009
    was the men of my life
    but now alone

    no car crash then i have this men all times

    ( sorry my english is bad i know )

    BUT I LIKE RJ!!!!


    Really sorry to hear that and I hope things are getting better.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 22, 2010 7:23 AM GMT
    Well, it's actually our anniversary in a few weeks...our 12th year together and he is still definately the man of my life.
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    Sep 22, 2010 7:37 AM GMT
    We are coming up on 12 years together.

    The biggest thing we do is resolve conflicts within the same day. If we get into an argument, and it does happen, we never go to bed with it. I think that has saved us.
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    Sep 22, 2010 7:44 AM GMT
    bajano said8 years!!!!!!!!!!!
    but my bf was dead with an car crash
    31.05.2009
    was the men of my life
    but now alone

    no car crash then i have this men all times

    ( sorry my english is bad i know )

    BUT I LIKE RJ!!!!


    Condolences man icon_sad.gificon_sad.gificon_sad.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 22, 2010 9:13 AM GMT
    Almost eleven years here. The two biggest factors contributing to the longevity of the relationship are mutual respect and a mutual willingness to compromise.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 22, 2010 9:15 AM GMT
    2 MONTHS! icon_cool.gif
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    Sep 22, 2010 9:16 AM GMT
    bajano said8 years!!!!!!!!!!!
    but my bf was dead with an car crash
    31.05.2009
    was the men of my life
    but now alone

    no car crash then i have this men all times

    ( sorry my english is bad i know )

    BUT I LIKE RJ!!!!

    icon_cry.gif
  • ueatzit

    Posts: 174

    Sep 22, 2010 9:25 AM GMT
    My partner and I will make 10 years in December 2010. While we haven't reached that 10-year goal yet, we have seen relationships form and fall among our friends. Sometimes we feel so incredibly lucky to have found one another but mostly we both realise that it takes a lot of work to get all the rewards.

    As individuals we need to be ready to forgive the other for all sorts of things from the mundane to the big. It also takes a lot of communication and willingness to understand one another. In my opinion, too many guys give up on someone and a relationship when it gets a little rough or their partner doesn't fit their expectations 100%. In other words I think too many guys are just waiting for any excuse to move on whether they know it or not.

  • Sk8Tex

    Posts: 738

    Sep 22, 2010 5:36 PM GMT
    Seven and a half years here... I attribute the fact that were still together because we know everything about each other. I haven't forgotten what it was like meeting him for the first time and how much he made me laugh or smile, and occasionally I just think back to that day and a grin spreads across my face unknowingly.

    I definetly agree with UrsaMajor...never ever go to bed upset over silly things, even if it means swallowing your pride and saying those two lil words that can work miracles,... "Im sorry." Despite popular opinion no one ever died from not being right all the time....and besides thats the mans job lol.

    Another thing I still find fascinating about him is that no matter how upset/grumpy/bitchy/moody and/or irrational I am being, he can still completely turn my mood around in the opposite direction just by being a goofy dork...I love him! icon_biggrin.gificon_redface.gificon_lol.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 22, 2010 5:37 PM GMT
    40 years and I have no idea how, but it gets better every year!
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    Sep 22, 2010 6:06 PM GMT
    bajano said8 years!!!!!!!!!!!
    but my bf was dead with an car crash
    31.05.2009
    was the men of my life
    but now alone

    no car crash then i have this men all times

    ( sorry my english is bad i know )

    BUT I LIKE RJ!!!!


    Oh sorry to hear that mate....warm hugs
  • DuggerPDX

    Posts: 386

    Sep 22, 2010 6:20 PM GMT
    16 years in August.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 22, 2010 6:20 PM GMT
    12 years together. 2 contributing factors are compromise and intimacy.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 22, 2010 6:22 PM GMT
    Just celebrated 17 years in April.....
    no advice to give anyone ,no analysis,no words of wisdom.It works thats all.
  • Regina_Guy

    Posts: 406

    Sep 22, 2010 6:36 PM GMT
    14 years in November. It's all about trust and honesty baby! icon_smile.gif
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    Sep 22, 2010 6:47 PM GMT
    Regina_Guy said14 years in November. It's all about trust and honesty baby! icon_smile.gif


    Seven years for me, and I'd say Regina_Guy hit the nail on the head. Might add compromise, as well.

  • thisguy023

    Posts: 204

    Sep 22, 2010 6:58 PM GMT

    18 years here.
    I believe the trick is not to analyze things too much. Just live and love.
    One rule we do follow: never go to sleep angry.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 22, 2010 7:21 PM GMT
    20 yrs. We are each others "soft place to fall" no matter what troubles life throws our way.
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    Sep 22, 2010 7:34 PM GMT
    10 years in October 2010. =)