Late Bloomer Gay?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Sep 21, 2010 7:46 PM GMT
    Are any of you guys or do you know anyone that REALIZED (not "came out") that they are gay later in life, after puberty, like in their 20's?

    I only caught myself first time looking at a guy when I was 22 and tried masturbating to gay porn at 23 (which is also the first time I tried gay sex). Before I was only interested in girls.

    I'm asking, because last few times I've been with guys, I just can't stay hard when I'm in a guy - I go flaccid really quick, and I'm wondering maybe I'm not gay at all. I've only had sex like 5 times so far with guys. I'm 25 now.

    On the other hand, I think it might be some physical problem, because I never get morning wood (and I heard most guys do at least once in awhile) and my semen is all clear- not white.

    Appreciate any insights, especially the first question, I know I digressed a bit.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Sep 21, 2010 9:52 PM GMT
    I started realizing I was gay when I was 21...as for the sexual issues I do not know the answer to that. Maybe check with your doctor.

    You said you were "only" interested in women before...did you keep it up for them?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Sep 21, 2010 10:17 PM GMT
    iustas saidI'm asking, because last few times I've been with guys, I just can't stay hard when I'm in a guy - I go flaccid really quick, and I'm wondering maybe I'm not gay at all. I've only had sex like 5 times so far with guys. I'm 25 now.


    My theory is if you get off on gay porn then you are attracted to men. If you can't get hard around them it's some kind of psycho-somatic problem. Or maybe they're just not that attractive? Try a guy and a girl at the same time and see what happens. Also...post pics of the incident. icon_cool.gif
  • GQjock

    Posts: 11649

    Sep 21, 2010 10:37 PM GMT
    I was 18 the first time with a guy
    but I knew WAY before that

    as far as having a physical problem goes
    If you can masturbate without a problem and it only happens with men
    It's a performance problem meaning there's a mental block somewhere
    sex is what you enjoy
    or what gets you off
    If you like guys >>>>> you're gay
    Just try to relax and enjoy it when you're with a guy
    Don't focus on ....... Ooooooh I'm having GAY SEX icon_eek.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Sep 21, 2010 10:44 PM GMT
    pshhh I beat you by 12 years. ;) Oh 1st grade...such a prolific year for laying on top of other boys naked.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Sep 21, 2010 10:51 PM GMT
    ...performance anxiety...pure plain and simple.....you have "questions" and your little (excuse me....BIG buddy) is just reading the que cards... How well do you know the guys? are you comfortable around them? Your body and mind communicate and if one is not into it, the other will have issues participating too.....fortunately for you, there are MANY on here, (me included) that would be willing to offer private classes to get you over this performance anxiety.....LOL! Just sayin'......icon_cool.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Sep 21, 2010 11:00 PM GMT
    Didn't figure it out until about a month, month and a half ago...I'm 22. I think I was kidding myself and am amazed I didn't pick up on it until now.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Sep 22, 2010 12:25 AM GMT
    Damn I figured it out in 7th grade. I always kinda knew I had something with boys but of course your brought up to like girls. It took some figuring out and putting things together that I was actually the opposite. Very bad time in my life (not JUST because of that but that just added fuel to the fire).
  • wildkatz

    Posts: 133

    Sep 22, 2010 12:27 AM GMT
    AAwwwwwww hell you guys! Back in the 80's and early 90's in the small town I was raised in it was tough! I realized in the 7th/8th grade. Denied it all thru high school and college........finally admitted it to me after a failed engagement and some heartache around 25/26. SO that was late to me! But everyones journey is different and unique. Live the journey.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Sep 22, 2010 12:35 AM GMT
    Maybe you should try the bottom role........
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Sep 22, 2010 2:18 AM GMT
    GQjock saidI was 18 the first time with a guy
    but I knew WAY before that

    as far as having a physical problem goes
    If you can masturbate without a problem and it only happens with men
    It's a performance problem meaning there's a mental block somewhere
    sex is what you enjoy
    or what gets you off
    If you like guys >>>>> you're gay
    Just try to relax and enjoy it when you're with a guy
    Don't focus on ....... Ooooooh I'm having GAY SEX icon_eek.gif


    LOL that was fun to read icon_smile.gif

    I was 8 I had a crush *blush* on my classmate next to me :-S
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Sep 22, 2010 1:19 PM GMT
    Sporty_g said...performance anxiety...pure plain and simple.....you have "questions" and your little (excuse me....BIG buddy) is just reading the que cards... How well do you know the guys? are you comfortable around them? Your body and mind communicate and if one is not into it, the other will have issues participating too.....fortunately for you, there are MANY on here, (me included) that would be willing to offer private classes to get you over this performance anxiety.....LOL! Just sayin'......icon_cool.gif


    OP here,

    Maybe it is Performance Anxiety, but the fact that I never get morning wood is a bit suspicious to me.

    From what I've read online, all men get nocturnal erections and experience frequent morning wood if you wake up during one of these erections. In fact, I've read that the way they test for erection problems is by checking if you have nocturnal erections. From Wikipedia:

    "The existence and predictability of nocturnal tumescence is used by sexual health practitioners to ascertain whether a given case of erectile dysfunction (E.D.) is psychological or physiological in origin." - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nocturnal_penile_tumescence

    While I'm definitely an anxious guy, and have not had much sex (once with a girl, four times w/ guys), I can't help but think that it may be some physical problem.

    Thinking about getting Cialis at 25...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Sep 22, 2010 8:49 PM GMT
    shameless bump
  • Sk8Tex

    Posts: 738

    Sep 22, 2010 9:02 PM GMT
    I think alot of this could just be a mental thing, not necessarily saying there is something wrong with you. But you really have to be able to just relax, and not let your mind wander. Focus in on the act and your partner, not your worries, concerns, phobias etc... If something isn't working for you, then change it, but dont force yourself to do anything your not really 100% into. Your mind has a strange way of telling you what you like without you even realizing it...listen to it.