Came out as GAY last night =/

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    Oct 10, 2010 9:34 PM GMT
    I came out as bi last weekend but last night when i got home from a night out i was talking to my mom about being bi/gay an shee was really cool with it, she seemed chuffed! So i texted all my mates( i was super drunk) telling them i'm gay an woke up this morning feeling abit embaressed when i read my sent messages lol but i feel good now that i've let it out!! Does everyone have this little nervous feeling in their stomach after you came out to everyone? I suppose it's like keeping a secret an asoon as that secret get's let out you feel kinda guilty but also good because it's been let out?
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    Oct 10, 2010 9:38 PM GMT
    KickStarts saidDoes everyone have this little nervous feeling in their stomach after you came out to everyone?
    I can't speak for everyone, but I certainly was a little nervous at first. In fact, even after being "out" for the past 20 years, I still get a little nervous sometimes telling someone I just met. The difference is now I've learned how to handle that emotion and not let it bother me.

    Oh and congrats on coming out to all your friends! Now you'll get to find out who's "really" your friend, and who's not. icon_biggrin.gif
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    Oct 11, 2010 1:45 AM GMT
    I still get a little nervous when I tell someone I just met that I'm gay. Or when it comes up at work. But since I've built up a lot of friends around me over the years that are cool with it, when someone new has a problem.. I can just shrug my shoulders, and walk away without a word.
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    Oct 11, 2010 1:59 AM GMT
    Congrats man! Its always hard to let it out but once you do it makes interacting with that person a lot easier. Hope everything works out well for you.
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    Oct 11, 2010 2:03 AM GMT
    Well done! icon_smile.gif
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    Oct 11, 2010 2:27 AM GMT
    Congratulations, and welcome to the rest of your secret-free, proud life!
    And yeah, I was a little nervous after I came out just because keeping that secret and playing the "pronoun game" for so long had become a way of life... and it was a little unsettling to realize that those days were over after having lived my life in a pattern like that. All I can tell you is that I'm so grateful that the "pronoun game" is over and that the integrity that has come from being and living honestly cannot be topped.
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    Oct 11, 2010 2:40 AM GMT
    KickStarts saidI came out as bi last weekend but last night when i got home from a night out i was talking to my mom about being bi/gay an shee was really cool with it, she seemed chuffed! So i texted all my mates( i was super drunk) telling them i'm gay an woke up this morning feeling abit embaressed when i read my sent messages lol but i feel good now that i've let it out!! Does everyone have this little nervous feeling in their stomach after you came out to everyone? I suppose it's like keeping a secret an asoon as that secret get's let out you feel kinda guilty but also good because it's been let out?


    Liberating, isn't it? Congratulations guy! =^.^=
    Be free and happy!
  • barriehomeboy

    Posts: 2475

    Oct 11, 2010 2:48 AM GMT
    It's normal to feel like you've done something wrong after you've done something that is right for you, if it isn't right for the people around you. It's called guilt, and guilt is what the rest of the world uses to keep us in the closet. You just broke free. Rejoice in your acceptance from your mom. That's step one in your new happy life..
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    Oct 11, 2010 3:17 AM GMT
    God, my coming out didnt have this much drama and that was over 30 years ago. I thought things would be easier now.
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    Oct 11, 2010 3:19 AM GMT
    Honestly, the drama belongs in the theater. Straight folks don't go around shouting their sexuality, and unless you plan on fucking them, folks don't have a need to know. It's fine if you wanna' tell 'em but don't get caught up in it. It's JUST sexuality.
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    Oct 11, 2010 3:27 AM GMT
    chuckystud saidHonestly, the drama belongs in the theater. Straight folks don't go around shouting their sexuality, and unless you plan on fucking them, folks don't have a need to know. It's fine if you wanna' tell 'em but don't get caught up in it. It's JUST sexuality.
    A year ago I would have agreed, but not anymore.
    Now I consider that mindset equal to DADT, because that's exactly what it is.
    If we don't speak up, nobody will.
    If nobody speaks up, we'll continue to be oppressed.
    So, I'm all for letting others know about our sexuality. If they don't like it, they can go fuck themselves.
  • safety43_mma1...

    Posts: 4251

    Oct 11, 2010 6:29 AM GMT
    way to go it is so much more simple when u live the truth.
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    Oct 11, 2010 7:01 AM GMT
    Still get nervuos when I tell some ppl
  • Anto

    Posts: 2035

    Oct 11, 2010 7:44 AM GMT
    chuckystud saidHonestly, the drama belongs in the theater. Straight folks don't go around shouting their sexuality, and unless you plan on fucking them, folks don't have a need to know. It's fine if you wanna' tell 'em but don't get caught up in it. It's JUST sexuality.


    Straight folks actually do it's just that it's so common place most people don't ever think about it and the reason why people don't ask is because guys are assumed to like girls and girls are assumed to like guys.
    Heterosexuality is expressed in almost all aspects of society from culture to entertainment. One of the primary ways straight guys bond and relate to one another is by talking about women even.
  • Anto

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    Oct 11, 2010 7:47 AM GMT
    amar_m saidStill get nervuos when I tell some ppl


    That's understandable because the whole 'scariness' about coming out is how a person will react. Coming out is not a one time experience and who knows how the next person that finds out will react :, it's an unending thing.
  • Jacob_dane

    Posts: 100

    Oct 11, 2010 9:49 AM GMT
    First of all, good for you for finding who you are icon_smile.gif

    When I first came out, when I was 16 that is, I was nervous to the point of throwing up. I even had a hard time telling one of my best friends, who is gay, that I myself was gay lol. It's just hard to do. Now 7 years later I don't even initiate the "I'm gay" conversation. I let other people bring it up. If they want to know they will ask and I will give them the honest answer. It seems to work out sooo much better that way. At least for me anyway.
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    Oct 11, 2010 2:42 PM GMT
    Congratulations on coming out!

    To this day I still remember that feeling of telling people about being gay. I think it was mostly because it mattered to me who I was talking to. Now that all the important people in my life know I don't get all choked up, It's the fact and either you like/accept it or you can get out of my way.

    Congratz again!!
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    Oct 11, 2010 5:08 PM GMT
    Thanks guys icon_biggrin.gif I've gotta admit it does feel good but also scary that i'm out! But i definitely feel a big weight of my shoulders. Now everyone close to me knows i'm gay that's all that matters i mean i'm not the type of person who would tell every person i met that i'm gay but if someone asked me i'd tell um straight but it's not a big deal if weather they knew or not. Thanks again guys icon_smile.gif
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    Oct 11, 2010 5:19 PM GMT
    congrats, hope you enjoy your new lifestyle being out now icon_biggrin.gif
  • Crucializer

    Posts: 389

    Oct 11, 2010 5:42 PM GMT
    Congrats! And yes, very nervous -- but that feeling goes away little by little as time goes by ....
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    Oct 11, 2010 6:47 PM GMT
    paulflexes said
    chuckystud saidHonestly, the drama belongs in the theater. Straight folks don't go around shouting their sexuality, and unless you plan on fucking them, folks don't have a need to know. It's fine if you wanna' tell 'em but don't get caught up in it. It's JUST sexuality.
    A year ago I would have agreed, but not anymore.
    Now I consider that mindset equal to DADT, because that's exactly what it is.
    If we don't speak up, nobody will.
    If nobody speaks up, we'll continue to be oppressed.
    So, I'm all for letting others know about our sexuality. If they don't like it, they can go fuck themselves.


    I concur that folks should be out and honest, but, you don't need someone throwing it in your face, either. That's why you see my real name, face, etc, all over here, and elsewhere, and I'm open about it, but, I certainly don't swish around and call folks "honey" and the like. I'm very open and if we get into a conversation about women that's headed south, I just say "I prefer guys." and leave it at that.

    Events like Gay Pride do a lot to reinforce a creepy stereotype that some folks get into their head. There's LOTS of regular gay folks walking around all over the place. You break the stereotype by being honest and behaving properly. When folks see a gay / bi guy that's fun to be around and isn't creepy, acceptance is a lot easier to come by.

    I'll say things like 'he's a great looking guy" and the like around folks. I don't need a tutu to be me.