Sexual Compulsivity or Sexual Addiction

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    Oct 11, 2010 2:06 PM GMT
    And yet another sexual disorder.... if this sounds familiar to anyone, please do discuss and share...

    "Sexual compulsivity" is a term used to describe patterns where sex feels powerful without being pleasant, something you repeat over and over with less and less reward or sense of control. Examples of this can range from repeated attempts to act out sexually with people who have not consented -- flashing your genitals, say, or fondling strangers on the mall escalator -- to the more common and murkier pattern of unsatisfying sex sought out when you want to numb some other intense emotion. Feeling as if you're losing your ability to choose when and how to be sexual, having lots of sex with people whom you find abusive or unattractive, or seeing your sexual partners as objects to be used rather than people to connect with are all cited as symptoms of sexual compulsivity

    http://www.thebody.com/content/whatis/art14045.html
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    Oct 11, 2010 2:48 PM GMT
    "When I started always being late for work, or getting to the Greenmarket too late to buy the pretzels I love, those were real warning signs for me."

    Yep, when your sexual interests overwhelm your love of pretzels you know you need an intervention. I find this guy a little difficult to take seriously.

    "Compulsivity"?
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    Oct 11, 2010 10:11 PM GMT
    What's wrong with fondling strangers on the mall escalator? Would the Barbizon kiosk be more appropriate? icon_razz.gif
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    Oct 12, 2010 5:54 AM GMT
    People get compulsive about all sorts of things like hand washing or folding clothes or alphabetizing music collections, at least sex is a compulsive activity you share with someone else. Social compulsiveness.
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    Oct 12, 2010 6:11 AM GMT
    shyshortguy saidPeople get compulsive about all sorts of things like hand washing or folding clothes or alphabetizing music collections, at least sex is a compulsive activity you share with someone else. Social compulsiveness.



    Interesting point of view. So does that make it half as compulsive or double compulsive?
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    Oct 12, 2010 6:59 AM GMT
    I'm not saying it's normal to want to go around flashing your bits to people, but I'm saying the other part of that spectrum - with the unsatisfying sex or sex or seeing partners as objects - is normal. Sometimes you only have sex with someone you only see a couple of times, so how is that any different from seeing partners as objects? Sometimes you don't want the emotional "human to connect with" view of it.

    It can be healthy to see people as sex objects, too. Now, if you've got that symptom plus, say, you lose your job and contract every STD from Houston to Seattle, then you probably have a disorder.

    Sex lives are naturally complex and in some kind of disorder, naturally.
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    Oct 20, 2010 12:06 AM GMT
    This, too, may be helpful: http://bit.ly/sex-adict-test
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    Oct 20, 2010 10:23 AM GMT
    TerraFirma saidThis, too, may be helpful: http://bit.ly/sex-adict-test
    I fucking hate those kinds of site. Fill out the entire survey, then you have to give them your email address so they can spam the fuck out of your inbox.

    No thanks.
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    Jan 04, 2011 6:50 PM GMT
    Sexual compulsiveness is a real thing and you only have to go onto internet chat rooms and dating sites, saunas, cruise lounges and sex clubs to realise it's real.

    All of these places and cyber-places are full of 'regulars' and 'predators' who see sex not as a form of meaningful bonding and connection to give pleasure, yet as a means of self gratification, power play and control.

    I was one person who used to constantly focus on sex and frequent these places, and yes you do become numb to the act of sex and the whole purpose ends up being power play and you do perceive and treat people as objects. The sex isn't sex it becomes mechanical routine, and it's only when you realise how pathetic other people around you are, that you gain awareness to what is happening.

    And what I mean by how other people become is when you see how competitive, adolescent and nasty guys get in the pursuit of sex and how much harm it causes and what psychological damage it does to yourself then you realise that it's real.

    QUOTE ShyshortguyIt can be healthy to see people as sex objects, too.


    It's never healthy to see people as sex objects. You can admire and lust after a guy being conscious he's a human, with feelings and who has a life, without treating him as a Ken doll you want to molest!

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    Jan 04, 2011 6:51 PM GMT
    Tazo995 said
    shyshortguy saidPeople get compulsive about all sorts of things like hand washing or folding clothes or alphabetizing music collections, at least sex is a compulsive activity you share with someone else. Social compulsiveness.



    Interesting point of view. So does that make it half as compulsive or double compulsive?


    "Gedeelde vreugd is dubbele vreugd!"
  • neosyllogy

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    Jan 04, 2011 6:53 PM GMT
    Art_Deco said"When I started always being late for work, or getting to the Greenmarket too late to buy the pretzels I love, those were real warning signs for me."

    Yep, when your sexual interests overwhelm your love of pretzels you know you need an intervention. I find this guy a little difficult to take seriously.


    Hahahaha! icon_lol.gif
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    Jan 04, 2011 7:12 PM GMT
    SAA has been around for years and years. This is nothing new.

    One of the treatment centres I worked at in Denver treated Sex Addicts. It can be quite debilitating.
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    Jan 04, 2011 8:38 PM GMT
    People get compulsive about all sorts of things like hand washing or folding clothes or alphabetizing music collections, at least sex is a compulsive activity you share with someone else. Social compulsiveness.

    I think, though, with some people, this compulsivity is something the perp doesn't want. He/she cannot control it. That's where the anxiety lies...
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    Jan 04, 2011 8:49 PM GMT
    Hell, I'm comfortable with either one ! icon_rolleyes.gif
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    Jan 04, 2011 9:10 PM GMT
    paulflexes saidWhat's wrong with fondling strangers on the mall escalator? Would the Barbizon kiosk be more appropriate? icon_razz.gif


    Nothing, unless he's a plain-clothed cop ;).

    Strange as this may sound, I prefer giving someone a nice foot massage to having sex. To me it's much more rewarding listening to someone sighing with pleasure than grunting "You're the best, oooh, ahhh, ahhh, ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" , then lighting a ciggie and breaking wind after they've humped me ;).