Early this morning, at 0120, I had a call from a client of mine. He was drunk, and more than anything, just wanted someone to talk to.
He had been in a long, involved, discussion with his father regarding his place in life, and so on, and, not meeting with his father's approval, and with a pending wedding in a few weeks to a gorgeous girl (my client has been on "Survivor" and is drop dead good looking and in great shape, got it together, etc.), but, not meeting with his father's approval, yet, again, he buried himself in booze, and called "Uncle Chucky." Well, I told him, there had to come a day when he told his dad that he wouldn't always meet his expectations, and that he had to get his dad to accept that, and he had to allow himself to accept the fact he would probably never get his father's complete approval.
When I won my first bodybuilding trophy, after being encouraged for years to be competitive, and after having worked my skinny, little, shaved, ass off, my dad told me how stupid it was, and how it would never make me any money. Go figure.
I tell you this, because I sound like a broken record, but, here's where it starts: you have to come to like yourself, quit being lazy, and realize that you shape much, but, not all, of your destiny. Once you go there, and stop worrying about those that would be jealous, hateful, and so on, you give yourself permission to both make mistakes, and be successful, without the approval of others. Once you get honest about why YOU eat, while others stop eating...you'll have the battle mostly won. It's not hard, IF...you make a positive efforts towards change.
Wallowing in self-indulgent, self-pity, self-analysis, will get you nowhere, fast, and, if you continue to do things in the same way, things will remain the same.
No matter what your lot in life, there will always be others who, in their own fucked up lives, lash out, or are nasty, etc. You have to come to let them go in one ear and out the other. (I have a couple of guys with fixations on me, here, and it's entertaining, but, not something that I let bother me at a high level. They're mentally ill.)
You need to take charge. Get your profile done. Get your pictures done. Engage yourself in a learning process about why you're fucked up, and how to fix it. These aren't things that anyone else can do for you.
Number one thing...of all...is that while you need to lead your life for you, FIRST, you cannot be consumed by a negative I,I,I, me, me, me, thing, thinking you're a victim in some way.
Now is the time for you to get off of your ass and get in motion, learning everything you can about diet, exercise, eating conditions, why you like or don't like yourself, and ditching the folks in your life that would hinder your goals. You MUST change, to affect change.