The College Experience?

  • swimmer8671

    Posts: 429

    Oct 17, 2010 6:56 AM GMT
    I was wondering what the college experience is like? When ur in college is it alot easier to be gay? Is meeting guys easier?

    Background knoweledge on me: I'm attending college in Laguna Beach, California. I'm super out going, and friendly.

    Would appreciate the feedback thanks icon_smile.gif
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    Oct 17, 2010 7:04 AM GMT
    I ended up picking the same school as my best friend, 2 camp friends and another friend frm a teen tour. I had friends going to American, Gtwn and Maryland So basically it was the second part of high school for me. If I could do it over I'd pick a school where I'd have to seek my independence frm the beginning w/out the support of friends. Huge mistake. This is a crucial time for you to develop independence..... DO IT!
    and enjoy it.
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    Oct 17, 2010 7:07 AM GMT
    That's right just do it and enjoy it!

    I always say, "COLLEGE! Best 10 years of my life."

    and I only have like 5-6 more to go. You'll meet such a variety of people, but don't go with the mindset that you're gonna 'get a boyfriend'. You will fail.

    Focus on education; that's what you're paying for, but also go out find out what YOU are about.
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    Oct 17, 2010 7:08 AM GMT
    I transferred and didn't live on campus. My college experience was commuting to school, going to class, and then straight home.
  • swimmer8671

    Posts: 429

    Oct 17, 2010 7:13 AM GMT
    haha oh trust me i always focus on school first, if you read my bio i'm a total nerd. I just wonder if its ok to finally be openly gay. I come from wyoming, a complete red state so there is alot of people here that wouldn't be ok with gay people. I guess i just assume california to be alot more open minded i guess. Am i wrong?
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    Oct 17, 2010 7:17 AM GMT
    swimmer8671 saidhaha oh trust me i always focus on school first, if you read my bio i'm a total nerd. I just wonder if its ok to finally be openly gay. I come from wyoming, a complete red state so there is alot of people here that wouldn't be ok with gay people. I guess i just assume california to be alot more open minded i guess. Am i wrong?


    Read your bio. You'll be fine. I'm from the midwest and got my undergrad at ASU. Thank god you are getting out of WY. Geez.

    It's okay to come out of the closet wherever you are. You gotta just have a backup.
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    Oct 17, 2010 7:22 AM GMT
    well, here it was a lot easier only because i moved to a big city to attend college. but also guys look at you differently when you say you are in college compared to HS.
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    Oct 17, 2010 5:21 PM GMT
    Think you'll be okay... You can do a lot worse than Laguna Beach.

    I went to a really conservative college in New York because the swim team recruited me.... not such a great move personally or academically. Ended up majoring in alcoholism there and staying in the closet because of a lot of hate crimes towards gays and lesbians. Still graduated and managed to have a good life, both professionally and personally. You don't have to do that, though....obviously.

    My suggestions: Get active with the LGBT student union if they have one. Stay focused on school. Love yourself enough to be yourself no matter what. Party if you must, but try not to go too far. And most important.... ENJOY IT!
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    Oct 17, 2010 5:37 PM GMT
    There are very few schools in America (BYU or something like that comes to mind) where you couldn't be openly gay on campus. The trick is figuring out what aspect of campus life would be accepting. When I was in college, I wasn't out (not technically in the closet though because I hadn't even realized I was gay at this point). I joined a fraternity and although it was a blast, if I had realized I was gay at that point in my life there is no way I would have felt comfortable coming out...rampant homophobia.

    Fraternities, athletics teams and religious groups may be less open to being gay. Of course, it depends on the group and the school. It generally seemed that the fraternities that were going through colonization phases were very happy to take gay members and they could even bring their boyfriends to invites and date parties. The fraternities that had been on campus a lot longer (usually much more active socially with more members, bigger parties, nicer houses, etc) tend to be a lot more conservative and will generally not bid openly gay members.

    Have fun in college, it is a blast! Push your comfort zone, it's a fantastic time to discover new sides of yourself.
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    Oct 17, 2010 6:47 PM GMT
    I went to college in Europe... Its very different.. I didnt particularly find it any more gay friendly than anywhere else.... But I did have a GREAT time in college, not for gay stuff, just for the college stuff is just fuckin so much FUN
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    Oct 17, 2010 7:06 PM GMT
    The college experience: figuring out what you are paying large sums of money for.
    1. Are you paying money to make loads of friends and get drunk every weekend?
    2. Are you paying money to be involved in 20 different clubs?
    3. Or are you paying money for a piece of paper with your name and degree along side the signatures of important people at your college (most that you have never met)?

    Of course you can mix numbers 1 & 2 with number 3, but number 3 should come first... especially if you are continuing your education after undergraduate.

    In ten years... you don't want to be thinking, "I wish I would have studied for the o-chem final instead of going to that party."

    I don't mean to lecture. I'm a tutor at my university, and I often tutor freshmen for the same reason: They do not know how to balance their social life with their academic life.

    Well I feel like a depressing poo-poo head... don't get me wrong, college is fun!

    Edit:

    PS: I wanted to be a marine biologist for almost 12 years--I'm actually a certified scuba diver because of my continues interest in marine bio and oceanography.
  • Import

    Posts: 7190

    Oct 17, 2010 11:17 PM GMT
    I had an excellent college experience.

    SOOoooooo much fun. Prob because I was drunk and or high most of the time.
    I honestly wish I could go back to college, I freakin loved it.
    Enjoy it dude,
  • swimmer8671

    Posts: 429

    Oct 18, 2010 4:52 AM GMT
    Hey thanks for all the advice guys. I don't really need to worry about the partying aspect of college because as i am really great at being social i don't drink or do drugs. Not because i'm a goody goody or a prude or something just the experiences in my life have shown me that they just arn't smart things to do, things like that have really hurt my family. I think my biggest problem will be tearing myself away from the beach lol Cuz i love tanning, swimming, and seeing cute boys half naked haha.
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    Oct 18, 2010 5:04 AM GMT
    tanning is gross. You shouldn't do it. Save your skin please.
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    Oct 18, 2010 5:23 AM GMT
    I was "pretend closeted" in college (out, but didn't mention it).
    It greatly increased my sex life that way, because all the other guys were also closeted. icon_biggrin.gif
  • swimmer8671

    Posts: 429

    Oct 18, 2010 5:56 AM GMT
    paulflexes saidI was "pretend closeted" in college (out, but didn't mention it).
    It greatly increased my sex life that way, because all the other guys were also closeted. icon_biggrin.gif


    so your saying if people asked you said you were gay but you didn't flaunt it?
  • tbeaux

    Posts: 419

    Oct 18, 2010 6:09 AM GMT
    College is usually more accepting of being openly gay. You'll have your dumbasses, and you'll make some of the best friends that will be with you for the rest of your life. Don't worry about any of that. Join some clubs, find a sport, find some friends, go drink and have fun, and go to class. The worst thing you could do is stay in your room and do homework. "Don't let school interfere with your education." Of course do your homework, but atleast for me, I have learned so much more going out and talking to people, joining clubs, and trying to get involved. Meet people. but yeah enjoy it!