Out at Work

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    Oct 21, 2010 1:53 PM GMT
    So I've just told my closest work colleagues (finally!) that I have a bf.

    All positive reactions icon_cool.gif

    I don't really know why it took me so long. The trigger really was that I'm moving into a new house with my bf soon (though we already live together) and I wanted to tell them about that, and then obviously the rest then follows.

    My friends knew a few years ago, my parents have known since January 2008 and my grandparents & rest of family since probably early 2009. I've been very lucky in that I have had nothing but support and acceptance from everyone, and I feel incredibly grateful for that.

    For anyone else who isn't out, whatever stage you're at, I wish you all the best and if you're contemplating taking the plunge, just do it! It's so much better out than in.
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    Oct 21, 2010 1:57 PM GMT
    Awesome! My coworkers still give me hell, but in a fun way. I think they wanna sex me. icon_razz.gif
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    Oct 21, 2010 2:02 PM GMT
    paulflexes saidAwesome! My coworkers still give me hell, but in a fun way. I think they wanna sex me. icon_razz.gif


    Most my co-workers are women so if they want to sex me I'll get scared and run away!
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    Oct 21, 2010 2:14 PM GMT
    Nick - I bet a good part of your experience is because they already respected you as a person.
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    Oct 21, 2010 2:20 PM GMT
    NickFit said
    paulflexes saidAwesome! My coworkers still give me hell, but in a fun way. I think they wanna sex me. icon_razz.gif


    Most my co-workers are women so if they want to sex me I'll get scared and run away!
    I don't blame ya. I would too. icon_lol.gif
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    Oct 21, 2010 2:41 PM GMT
    socalfitness saidNick - I bet a good part of your experience is because they already respected you as a person.


    Haha, well maybe. I am pretty easy to get on with. If I were a total dick, perhaps they would have been more negative!
  • rnch

    Posts: 11524

    Oct 21, 2010 2:45 PM GMT
    i still don't understand why it's ANY business of your fellow co-workers what (and whom) you do away from the job.

    98% of my co-workers are people i would not associate with anywhere except at work....why give them any knowledge of my personal, away-from-the-job life?

    icon_confused.gif
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    Oct 21, 2010 2:54 PM GMT
    rnch saidi still don't understand why it's ANY business of your fellow co-workers what (and whom) you do away from the job.

    98% of my co-workers are people i would not associate with anywhere except at work....why give them any knowledge of my personal, away-from-the-job life?

    icon_confused.gif


    I do get that, and for most of the people that I interact with at work I agree - I don't care to know anything about their personal life, and I don't care to share anything about mine.

    But these are people that I work closely with as a team, we talk about our lives, we go out for lunch sometimes etc, and it was becoming increasingly difficult to talk about my life away from work when they didn't know any of that stuff. It also would have been a bit odd for me to pretend that I wasn't moving house.
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    Oct 21, 2010 3:39 PM GMT
    Well Nick, next step is a house warming so everyone can meet the bf, how easy is that......congrats brother....Keithicon_cool.gif
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    Oct 21, 2010 3:43 PM GMT
    Congratulations, and you are very fortunate to receive such great support.

    I feel pretty lucky that I work with a great bunch of people and they all know about me...plus it helps that there are quite a few of us there!
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    Oct 21, 2010 3:44 PM GMT
    vetteset saidWell Nick, next step is a house warming so everyone can meet the bf, how easy is that......congrats brother....Keithicon_cool.gif


    Thanks Keith! Yeah hopefully we can move in before Christmas and I'll have a few people over - depends on timings and whether we get everything sorted! Otherwise wait until we're a bit more settled and have all the furniture etc.
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    Oct 21, 2010 4:18 PM GMT
    the more people are open the more homosexuality becomes normalized and the less homophobia is tolerated. It is a GOOD thing. You are not sharing who is top and who is bottom or whether you like leather... that´s not for that audience, but it´s GOOD that they know you are gay. Breaks stereotypes.
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    Oct 21, 2010 5:21 PM GMT
    I have been lucky enough to have worked in an accepting place, it motivated me to be more open.
    When I left there I made the conscious decision, I would never play the “pro-noun game” again. It is wonderful to have another thing you don’t have to worry about.
    Two weeks ago one of the girls I work with asked me if I had seen the pictures of Bret. She had seen the picture of him in my locker. She wanted to know if I thought the ones on line were real.
    Yes, it was awkward…wonderfully awkward.
    And yes, I have pictures of men on the inside of my locker and a picture of me and my man on the outside; just like the ones my coworkers have.
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    Oct 21, 2010 10:36 PM GMT
    All of my colleagues know about my sexuality. I'm not very secretive. I'm pretty sure my patients have a good idea too. They keep coming back.
  • disasterpiece

    Posts: 2991

    Oct 22, 2010 7:28 AM GMT
    Lostboy saidthe more people are open the more homosexuality becomes normalized and the less homophobia is tolerated. It is a GOOD thing. You are not sharing who is top and who is bottom or whether you like leather... that´s not for that audience, but it´s GOOD that they know you are gay. Breaks stereotypes.


    This.

    Congrats with that nick.

    I had it pretty easy since I worked in a restaurant while more than 50% of the staff (including the owner) were gay. Straight was the minority and THEY would folluw US in the Village. How 'bout that, huh? They would even like it hahaha... Awww, how I miss them icon_smile.gif
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    Oct 22, 2010 7:37 AM GMT
    Congrats man. Its a big disclosure. Hopefully it'll help you build a stronger relationship with your coworkers. Its awesome that they just don't care that you're gay.
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    Oct 22, 2010 7:40 AM GMT
    rnch saidi still don't understand why it's ANY business of your fellow co-workers what (and whom) you do away from the job.

    98% of my co-workers are people i would not associate with anywhere except at work....why give them any knowledge of my personal, away-from-the-job life?

    icon_confused.gif


    for me it's the opposite, 98% of my co-workers are people i do associate with outside of work... so it's only right that they know... it's just another part of my life that i enjoy sharing with them...

    for each and everyone of us it is different...

    but i would like to say that it's great to 'bring my whole self' to work... i belong to a non-profit group called 'pride in diversity' that operates in Sydney and the companies that are members recognise that diversity in the workplace is just something that needs to be respected and appreciated...

    their website is a great resource for information about why embracing diversity imakes good business sense... check it out at http://www.prideindiversity.com.au...

    i'm not saying you have to come out at work, far from it, but there are companies and individuals that actually recognise that there are benefits...