What do you think of this story? And how would you react in this situation?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 23, 2010 9:10 PM GMT
    dirlLast week, my boyfriend of three years laid a ton of bricks on me; he stated that he has been practisiing Christianity for the last three weeks and believes our relationship is a sin before proceeding to tell me that he is sorry but he cannot be with me anymore.

    The thing about this I do not get is that throughout these three years, he tells me that he still loves me and still finds me attractive however he does not feel our relationship is right anymore because of his rekindled faith (he was Christian for the rest of his life until a year before I met him). Whenever I try to approach him on this topic or try to secure my feelings about him, he always states that he cannot help me and usually replies with "my faith is absolute, I shall not walk the path of sin". If I question him in comparison to other religious christians who have accepted their sexual nature, he talks about corrupted paths of religion and how accepting his sexuality would pervert him.

    I really have no idea how to handle this situation, but he has been like this for a full week now and it is becoming quite scary, to see such a personality change from him who is usually very open abou this sexuality.

    Has anyone else had any simular experiences or any good suggestions of what I should do or some useful information I should read?

    My apologises if this thread upsets anyone who is religious however this is very important to me and I want to be as open about it as possible.


    More info
    [quote="Dirl"]Cheers for your opinions guys.

    Karl: Well within the second year of our relationship, I broke up with him due to him not trying to get a job or education for two years while I was in University. Two months later, on Christmas day he phoned me and asked me to take him back; after we got talking again he told me he had been diagnoised with cancer.

    Obviously, this shocked me but I was determined to stay with him. Last week, when he broke up with me due to religion he told me that he was lying to me about cancer was so I would take him back but he also stated that he felt horriable for doing so and found consultation in the bible which made him feel better. Yet he also got into the mindset of believing that he has been corrupt since he stopped believing in god for the last four years and this was evidenced by his deception.

    Since, he has been reading the bible commonly and joining religious groups, fortifying his faith further; when I talked to him today and asked him why he doesn't let us have a chance to rebuild our relationship, he stated that he will ask his Pastor tommorow for advice on my behalf for how I can get over him. Needless to say, that was not amusing.[/quote]
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 23, 2010 10:01 PM GMT
    simple, short and sweet and take it from someone who has been inside the evangelical puzzle: say bye bye and move on...you are in for torment and frustration otherwise..........Keithicon_cool.gif
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    Oct 23, 2010 10:04 PM GMT
    vetteset saidsimple, short and sweet and take it form someone who has been inside the evangelical puzzle: say bye bye and move on...you are in for torment and frustration otherwise..........Keithicon_cool.gif


    Ditto. I wasted 14 years of my life with that crap.
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    Oct 23, 2010 10:42 PM GMT
    I won't date anyone who attends any religious organization.
    If I want a brainwashed boyfriend, I'll brainwash him myself. icon_twisted.gif
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    Oct 23, 2010 10:46 PM GMT
    Im Irish Catholic, however, where I come from the follows believe that the Pope is a dope and that the church rewords/changes the bible to meet their own ends.

    If I was faced with this situation I'd probably have no one to blame but myself for falling for such a nutcase.
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    Oct 23, 2010 11:40 PM GMT
    I actually had this happen to me as well.
    We met, hit it off right away and had some of the most amazing sex for almost 4 months. I seriously thought he was the "one".
    I helped him thru a bad time: bankruptcy, and losing his home. Once he lost his job he spent time with his family (big in the Harvest church). Once he came back, he renounced his homosexuality, convinced his situation; all the bad stuff that had happened to him was god’s vengeance on him for his sins.
    The ironic part for me was that he blamed me most, because before me he had never considered sodomy; like I was the one begging to be topped.
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    Oct 24, 2010 3:17 AM GMT
    anymore stories
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    Oct 24, 2010 3:21 AM GMT
    amuletazawakh said
    dirlLast week, my boyfriend of three years laid a ton of bricks on me; he stated that he has been practisiing Christianity for the last three weeks and believes our relationship is a sin before proceeding to tell me that he is sorry but he cannot be with me anymore.

    The thing about this I do not get is that throughout these three years, he tells me that he still loves me and still finds me attractive however he does not feel our relationship is right anymore because of his rekindled faith (he was Christian for the rest of his life until a year before I met him). Whenever I try to approach him on this topic or try to secure my feelings about him, he always states that he cannot help me and usually replies with "my faith is absolute, I shall not walk the path of sin". If I question him in comparison to other religious christians who have accepted their sexual nature, he talks about corrupted paths of religion and how accepting his sexuality would pervert him.

    I really have no idea how to handle this situation, but he has been like this for a full week now and it is becoming quite scary, to see such a personality change from him who is usually very open abou this sexuality.

    Has anyone else had any simular experiences or any good suggestions of what I should do or some useful information I should read?

    My apologises if this thread upsets anyone who is religious however this is very important to me and I want to be as open about it as possible.


    More info
    [quote="Dirl"]Cheers for your opinions guys.

    Karl: Well within the second year of our relationship, I broke up with him due to him not trying to get a job or education for two years while I was in University. Two months later, on Christmas day he phoned me and asked me to take him back; after we got talking again he told me he had been diagnoised with cancer.

    Obviously, this shocked me but I was determined to stay with him. Last week, when he broke up with me due to religion he told me that he was lying to me about cancer was so I would take him back but he also stated that he felt horriable for doing so and found consultation in the bible which made him feel better. Yet he also got into the mindset of believing that he has been corrupt since he stopped believing in god for the last four years and this was evidenced by his deception.

    Since, he has been reading the bible commonly and joining religious groups, fortifying his faith further; when I talked to him today and asked him why he doesn't let us have a chance to rebuild our relationship, he stated that he will ask his Pastor tommorow for advice on my behalf for how I can get over him. Needless to say, that was not amusing.

    [/quote]
    Do you really need advice from anyone on this? Really?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 24, 2010 4:01 AM GMT
    Slip out the back Jack.
    Make new plans Sam
    You don't need to be coy Roy
    Just set yourself free.

    He will have to find his own calling in life. And you deserve a better one.

    The religion in his head is too strong for you to change him or be a shrink to him. The b est boyfreinds are the ones with an open mind, so that YOU can brainwash them yourself from the start. You can train a man to do anything including jumping up and down and licking your face when you come home.
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    Oct 24, 2010 4:03 AM GMT
    your bf ( or ex, whatever) has some mental condition.

    the manipulative deceits and now this ersatz of mystic exaltation .

    je prendrais mes jambes a mon cou ...

    i.e. i'd run away !
  • timmytwister

    Posts: 169

    Oct 24, 2010 4:29 AM GMT
    Religion can have a terrible hold on people. But the truth is, some people NEED the feeling of structure and security they get from it, at least for awhile.

    How would I react?
    Wish him the best, but then move on.

    Don't be angry.
    Look after yourself.
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    Oct 24, 2010 4:44 AM GMT
    Trolling?
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    Oct 24, 2010 4:50 AM GMT
    timmytwister saidReligion can have a terrible hold on people. But the truth is, some people NEED the feeling of structure and security they get from it, at least for awhile.

    How would I react?
    Wish him the best, but then move on.

    Don't be angry.
    Look after yourself.


    I agree. During my deconversion from catholicism to atheism, it took me almost a year to overcome the security of Pascal's Wager--during which time I was still miserable, fearful, and guilt-ridden for being gay.
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    Oct 24, 2010 4:52 AM GMT
    homosexuality_is_a_sin.jpg