Dating A Mature Man Is Awesome

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    Oct 26, 2010 2:45 PM GMT
    So a guy from another site actually came up with this list but as I read it, and being an older man, I sort of chuckled (an old guys word ) at the accuracy when comparing it to my life.

    Then I signed on to RJ and the first post was one about how hot older guys in their late 30s and 40s are, so decided to share this list.

    Comments welcome icon_smile.gif




    11 Reasons for Why Dating A Mature Man Is Awesome

    1 You Get Off: He's confident in bed. He knows what he is doing ... and if he doesn't by then, well, then he is hopeless and you don't have to waste your time trying to teach him.

    2 He Knows Cool Stuff You Never Heard Of: Generation gaps can be a good thing culture-wise. He can introduce you to music and movies that are totally awesome classics.

    3 He is Super Supportive: He is got a career and is secure in his work life, so he is totally supportive of your ambitions. And probably full of good advice! Not to mention the quarter-life crisis is kinda like the mid-life one.

    4 Someone Has Already Fixed Him Up: That relationship didn't work out. And now you can reap the benefits of nice shoes and hand towels in the bathroom.

    5 He Doesn't Stay Out Late: He might be a man's man, but after a certain age, he's not out on the prowl every night in the club looking for a fresh piece. He just wants to hang out with you.

    6 He Knows Himself: Nobody's perfect, and by now, he understands his main foibles. So, he can even communicate them to you to prevent friction.

    7 You're The Pretty One: It's shallow, but it's always nice to feel extra sexy to a certain level !

    8 He Doesn't Want To Be Alone: He's already hit that point when men realize they don't want to be all by themselves. Even if they intend to stay confirmed bachelors, they still want company.

    9 Salt N' Pepper Hair: So hot. Sure, not every middle-aged guy has got it, but it certainly ups your chances.

    10 No More Going Dutch: There won't be that stupid pause when the check comes; he'll almost always take it because a man of his years makes more money. You won't even feel the slightest bit guilty.

    11 He Is Going To Be This Rad Forever: Some peeps just lose their lust for life at a certain age, but your dude has still got it! He can not only keep up with your young butt, but he piques your interest. You know for sure that time doesn't slow him down. He's always willing to try new things. He's not going to turn into some couch potato all of a sudden. In another 20 years, he'll still be l-i-v-i-n' ...
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    Oct 30, 2010 11:10 PM GMT
    i LOVE this post
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    Oct 30, 2010 11:24 PM GMT
    [quote][cite]
    1 You Get Off: He's confident in bed. He knows what he is doing ... and if he doesn't by then, well, then he is hopeless and you don't have to waste your time trying to teach him.

    3 He is Super Supportive: He is got a career and is secure in his work life, so he is totally supportive of your ambitions. And probably full of good advice! Not to mention the quarter-life crisis is kinda like the mid-life one.

    6 He Knows Himself: Nobody's perfect, and by now, he understands his main foibles. So, he can even communicate them to you to prevent friction.

    .
    [/quote]

    Great comment, I only qualify with 1,3 and 6icon_razz.gif
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    Oct 30, 2010 11:33 PM GMT
    I love it! But I completely disagree with #10. I don't like when a man pays for me all the time. Even if he makes more money than I do, doesn't mean I can't pay sporadically.
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    Oct 30, 2010 11:54 PM GMT
    Fantastic post. The list is highly accurate. Now all that is required is that the gay community begins to accept these ideas. icon_rolleyes.gif
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    Oct 30, 2010 11:54 PM GMT
    As a guy who has generally dated older guys...

    If it's so wise to date an older guy vs a young one, why do you date younger guys?
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    Oct 31, 2010 8:40 AM GMT
    So true... I dated a guy in his 40's and all of those were true for him. Especially the sex part - he was amazing. Best blowjob I've ever gotten... icon_smile.gif
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    Oct 31, 2010 9:55 AM GMT
    I think dating a mature young man is awesome. icon_smile.gif
  • coolarmydude

    Posts: 9190

    Oct 31, 2010 10:04 AM GMT
    Pyrotech saidAs a guy who has generally dated older guys...

    If it's so wise to date an older guy vs a young one, why do you date younger guys?



    I thought the same thing. Why not two older guys together, or two mature younger guys as well? And not all older guys are really mature. I think the idea about maturity is correct, but it should never be correlated to age.
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    Oct 31, 2010 10:15 AM GMT
    coolarmydude said
    Pyrotech saidAs a guy who has generally dated older guys...

    If it's so wise to date an older guy vs a young one, why do you date younger guys?



    I thought the same thing. Why not two older guys together, or two mature younger guys as well? And not all older guys are really mature. I think the idea about maturity is correct, but it should never be correlated to age.


    Same here, I hang out with my kids and their friends once in a while, mid 20's. Yeah a night at a game, concert or a bar is fun. But to date that age group-20-30's, no way. No way am I judging, rather hang with someone in the same age neighborhood as meicon_razz.gif
    icon_razz.gificon_razz.gif
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    Oct 31, 2010 10:19 AM GMT
    coolarmydude said

    And not all older guys are really mature. I think the idea about maturity is correct, but it should never be correlated to age.



    Very true, age does not equal mature.

    Great post btw Don icon_biggrin.gif
  • turtleneckjoc...

    Posts: 4685

    Oct 31, 2010 10:38 AM GMT
    JustZeke saidFantastic post. The list is highly accurate. Now all that is required is that the gay community begins to accept these ideas. icon_rolleyes.gif


    Thank you from the bottom of my heart for saying, and believing your words here. Unacceptance turns into loneliness fast for us older guys and I hope everyone here, regardless of their age, reads what you have written.

    Bless you!
  • gymlocker

    Posts: 159

    Oct 31, 2010 11:21 AM GMT
    Cute article, but obviously written by an immature younger guy. Here' why...

    11 Reasons for Why Dating A Mature Man Is Awesome

    1 You Get Off: He's confident in bed. He knows what he is doing ... and if he doesn't by then, well, then he is hopeless and you don't have to waste your time trying to teach him.


    my comment:
    Everyone has likes and dislikes in bed. If you can't communicate those to your partner, then it doesn't matter how experienced he is, it ain't happening for you over time. Older guys are better only because most of them have learned that lesson. That's probably why that older guy spent all that crazy time up front chit chatting when all you wanted to do was get naked. The question is, do you even give a crap about getting him off?


    2 He Knows Cool Stuff You Never Heard Of: Generation gaps can be a good thing culture-wise. He can introduce you to music and movies that are totally awesome classics.


    my comment:
    Wise older guys realize that culture doesn't really change that much over time. It just gets recycled every few years. Every good screenplay or tune has it's origin in prehistoric tales and drumbeats. We only think we're making progress.



    3 He is Super Supportive: He is got a career and is secure in his work life, so he is totally supportive of your ambitions. And probably full of good advice! Not to mention the quarter-life crisis is kinda like the mid-life one.


    my comment:
    Most mature guys don't want a dependent. They want an equal. If you're looking to him for support, then he's probably looking at you like a trophy.



    4 Someone Has Already Fixed Him Up: That relationship didn't work out. And now you can reap the benefits of nice shoes and hand towels in the bathroom.


    my comment:
    Newsflash: Change comes from within. If he's chosen Gucci shoes and hand towels, it's because he fixed himself up, not because someone else did it. There's a lesson there for you younger guys.



    5 He Doesn't Stay Out Late: He might be a man's man, but after a certain age, he's not out on the prowl every night in the club looking for a fresh piece. He just wants to hang out with you.


    my comment:
    Unless you're on the prowl every night looking for a fresh piece. And sadly, it sounds like you might be. The difference is that a wise older guy won't tolerate it, only a dummy does that. And when did "being on the prowl" and being a "man's man" ever get equated as being the same thing? Grow up!



    6 He Knows Himself: Nobody's perfect, and by now, he understands his main foibles. So, he can even communicate them to you to prevent friction.


    my comment:
    He can. But he also expects you to communicate back. That's how communication works. Both ways. And if you don't think that you have any foibles, then you'd better not date in the first place. Many younger guys are a mess in the head, frankly.



    7 You're The Pretty One: It's shallow, but it's always nice to feel extra sexy to a certain level !


    my comment:
    OK, Barbie. I thought that getting your self esteem from another man was strictly a chick hang up. And one that they've spent the last 40 years trying to eradicate. I guess some gay "bois" still feel that way too. Maybe women have evolved further than men have. Maybe we all need to work on being a little prettier on the inside and not worry so much about the outside.



    8 He Doesn't Want To Be Alone: He's already hit that point when men realize they don't want to be all by themselves. Even if they intend to stay confirmed bachelors, they still want company.


    my comment:
    Wise older men have realized two things: (1) That you can be in a relationship and still feel "alone". (2) That the worst moment of loneliness is still better than the best moment of being in a bad relationship.



    9 Salt N' Pepper Hair: So hot. Sure, not every middle-aged guy has got it, but it certainly ups your chances.


    my comment:
    Shallow. See #7. Does a god given feature like hair or hair color, or any feature that most men can't really control, really affect the way you look at him or the chances for success in your relationship? Maybe you need to look at yourself before you jump into relationships just because someone has "salt and pepper" hair.



    10 No More Going Dutch: There won't be that stupid pause when the check comes; he'll almost always take it because a man of his years makes more money. You won't even feel the slightest bit guilty.


    my comment:
    But you should. Because you've now allowed yourself to be purchased. There's a word for that. A wise older man wants an equal, not a dependent. Even if you can't match his resources, break out the wallet every other time and show him that you're capable of being an independent, caring guy. It'll be worth it in the long run.



    11 He Is Going To Be This Rad Forever: Some peeps just lose their lust for life at a certain age, but your dude has still got it! He can not only keep up with your young butt, but he piques your interest. You know for sure that time doesn't slow him down. He's always willing to try new things. He's not going to turn into some couch potato all of a sudden. In another 20 years, he'll still be l-i-v-i-n'


    my comment:
    Nothing is forever. Expect change, because it happens whether you want it to or not. Keeping the relationship fresh and exciting is work, not a given. If you can't pull your 50% of the weight, don't sign on expecting him to do it all. Older men do have established patterns that are generally visible. It's you younger guys turning into the coach potato that he's worried about.



  • Hokenshi

    Posts: 387

    Oct 31, 2010 11:37 AM GMT
    I'd love to have an older boyfriend. I always end up with younger guys, they generally have a lot more baggage and haven't grown into themselves yet.

    So where as I think the article pulls up some interesting points, some I agree with other I think area bit off, I have to wonder what type of older guy would go for the type of guy who wrote that article? It doesn't sound like the younger guy has much to bring to the relationship other than his youth.

    An attractive and mature guy in his 40's can beat some twinky 20-year-old hands down in my book.
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    Oct 31, 2010 5:26 PM GMT
    maine1057 said
    coolarmydude said
    Pyrotech saidAs a guy who has generally dated older guys...

    If it's so wise to date an older guy vs a young one, why do you date younger guys?



    I thought the same thing. Why not two older guys together, or two mature younger guys as well? And not all older guys are really mature. I think the idea about maturity is correct, but it should never be correlated to age.


    Same here, I hang out with my kids and their friends once in a while, mid 20's. Yeah a night at a game, concert or a bar is fun. But to date that age group-20-30's, no way. No way am I judging, rather hang with someone in the same age neighborhood as meicon_razz.gif
    icon_razz.gificon_razz.gif


    I would have to agree. And I'd imagine someone from a generation ahead of me would be bored to tears talking about what my friends and I talk about (you know, programming languages and fisting and stuff). When I hang out with my friends in their 50s and I'm the only younger guy, I get bored to tears talking about property value and hearing what the cost of housing used to be like or how neighborhoods have changed. Sure, when I date a guy 15+ years older than me, we find things in common to talk about and all. But when I hang out with them and their friends their own age, I see what they like to do and hear what they like to talk about, and it makes me wonder why they put up with finding things in common with the younger guys rather than just relaxing with their long-time friends.

    Most of the benefits of generation gaps seem to revolve around physical attraction and sex. Older guys are usually more experienced in the sack and are more likely to stay committed, and younger guys usually have more energy and have the youth that most cultures crave.

    That said, I'll still probably stick to dating guys older than myself. They're just who I'm attracted to.
  • ajw18

    Posts: 141

    Oct 31, 2010 5:31 PM GMT
    agreed! totally into older guys.
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    Oct 31, 2010 7:00 PM GMT
    If I were single, I really wouldn't mind dating an older guy for a change. icon_biggrin.gif
  • mindblank

    Posts: 275

    Oct 31, 2010 7:30 PM GMT
    I used to go out with a guy double my age, in his early 40s. These statements didn't so much apply to him. In every way he kept up the argument that he would be more in-demand than me and we would take turns paying bills, until he ran away with €2000 of my money and never paid me back... Oh yeah and he tricked me into doing bareback, I trusted him and never checked for a condom... Oh yeah and he was having loads of affairs... Needless to say I am setting my sights a bit "higher" (ie younger) the next time.

    "Mature"=/= (is not equal to) older.

    And actually viagra sex isn't all that exciting. icon_twisted.gif
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    Oct 31, 2010 7:36 PM GMT
    Hilarious! And sooo true!
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    Oct 31, 2010 7:37 PM GMT
    I like "mature" guys...they're actually my preference...and I make my own money so that's not a concern for me ...I would never allow another guy to support me like that...best to be independent since I have always had to do so.
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    Oct 31, 2010 8:06 PM GMT
    RekindleTheFlame saidI love it! But I completely disagree with #10. I don't like when a man pays for me all the time. Even if he makes more money than I do, doesn't mean I can't pay sporadically.


    I gotta disagree with this. I find that older men have higher tastes than I would, and it is usually more expensive that what I can afford. However, it doesnt mean you shouldnt offer to pay back by cooking for him, or something of that nature.
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    Oct 31, 2010 8:38 PM GMT
    This list is awesome and accurate!

    My reply to the comment:
    If it's so wise to date an older guy vs a young one, why do you date younger guys?

    As a man of age 65, in my case, the reason I date younger men is that, I my be old in numbers, but I'm young in spirit. When I got to 65 I looked around and said, "This ain't so bad after all!"

    I date a younger man because I identify with his youth. I identify with his zest for life. I've met men my age who have lost their youthful spirit. No drive. No fun. No excitement. No more enthusiasm. And they always seem to have bad breath. lol!

    Consider a few quotes of wisdom:

    Everyone is the age of their heart. ~Guatemalan Proverb

    How old would you be if you didn't know how old you were? ~Satchel Paige

    Men do not quit playing because they grow old; they grow old because they quit playing. ~Oliver Wendell Holmes

    The tragedy of old age is not that one is old, but that one is young. ~Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray, 1891
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    Oct 31, 2010 8:42 PM GMT
    All this and a bagga chips.
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    Oct 31, 2010 8:46 PM GMT
    Well at my age, to date a mature man would mean visiting him in a Nursing Home; no thanks, I'll stick to my own age thank you very much.
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    Oct 31, 2010 8:47 PM GMT
    The fact you started it off in the bedroom lost my interest, as sex is only such a small part of anything long term and stable.