Gay Men Previously married to women

  • righton57

    Posts: 2

    Oct 30, 2010 1:53 PM GMT
    I am looking for a group of men who had been previously married (to women) to network with and disucss the "transisition", children and other general topics associated with this expericen in your life.

    I have been divorced now for almost a year. having lived the last 36 years of my life as a straight person on the outside I find myself confused and frusterated about MANY things. I know others are out there like myself and I would love to hear your stories and share mine with you!
  • laxdude25

    Posts: 604

    Oct 30, 2010 3:37 PM GMT
    There are many men on Real Jock who have been through what you have and are going through. I am sure you'll get a good response. There is no right response...everyone has to find the path that works for them. But good luck to you. Check out my profile, and if you think my experience could be helpful, let me know and we can chat/email directly. All the best, and congratulations.
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    Oct 30, 2010 3:44 PM GMT
    righton57 said...having lived the last 36 years of my life as a straight person on the outside I find myself confused and frusterated about MANY things. I know others are out there like myself and I would love to hear your stories and share mine with you!

    But you only ARE 36! icon_confused.gif

    So OK, I came out of deep denial at 45, now 61. Married twice, 2 children. E-mail me if you wish, glad to advise if I can, and share stories.

    BTW, I assume you know you have one of the greatest and most beautiful gay clubs in the US right there in downtown Omaha, The MAX, where I've been many times.
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    Oct 30, 2010 4:12 PM GMT
    Been there, done that. Anytime you want to hit me with question(s), or just need to vent, feel free. Still navigating those waters myself, but a couple more years into the process, so would be glad to help. icon_smile.gif
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    Oct 30, 2010 4:15 PM GMT
    HoosierLad saidBeen there, done that. Anytime you want to hit me with question(s), or just need to vent, feel free. Still navigating those waters myself, but a couple more years into the process, so would be glad to help. icon_smile.gif

    Or me with you. Just e-mail me.
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    Oct 30, 2010 4:20 PM GMT
    I was never married, but I did have a gf for a while. We broke up badly, but not over my sexuality. I've never had a bf though. I like your pics though. Very hot. icon_wink.gif
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    Oct 30, 2010 4:29 PM GMT
    I was married 27 years to the same woman. I discovered my true sexuality, during the split up, not as a child "always knowing " as so many have said. I had a nasty divorce, not due to my sexual preference, but for other issues.

    It has been hell on my kids, since my ex has been kind enough to include my teenage daughters in all of the dirty details of the divorce even after being told by two judges not too.

    I am here for you bud. Contact me on this forum or in private and Ill provide whatever opinion/advice/guidance that I can.

    best of luck

    Guy
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    Oct 30, 2010 4:39 PM GMT
    Art_Deco said
    HoosierLad saidBeen there, done that. Anytime you want to hit me with question(s), or just need to vent, feel free. Still navigating those waters myself, but a couple more years into the process, so would be glad to help. icon_smile.gif

    Or me with you. Just e-mail me.


    Thanks! Appreciate the offer!
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    Oct 30, 2010 4:47 PM GMT
    I can relate and would be happy to discuss "the transition."
  • turtleneckjoc...

    Posts: 4685

    Oct 30, 2010 4:50 PM GMT
    Please feel free to e-mail me as well. I was married for 28 years and now 18 months into my new and improved life. I think I have transitioned well and happy to tell you how I accomplished this.

    turtleneckjock
  • runninginmd

    Posts: 4

    Oct 30, 2010 5:03 PM GMT
    Have been there as well. It can be quite a process, but what in life isn't? If you need someone to vent, let me know. Having someone you could confide in was the best thing that helped me. When I didn't have that, it was harder during that period.
  • massbuildah

    Posts: 276

    Oct 30, 2010 5:07 PM GMT
    Add me to that list.

    I didn't get married to hide my sexuality, I jast wasn't truly aware of it. not conciously anyway. As I became aware, denial set in.... Until years later when I was honest with myself, then decided to do the right thing and be honest with my wife... Easier for me than for her, both are better off though. My kids are still young, we're all still close but the transition is definitley not easy to go through, and I'm still going thru it.

    Would love to chat with you and anyone in the same position, it definitley helps to relate and share stories. Hit me up anytime!
  • turtleneckjoc...

    Posts: 4685

    Oct 30, 2010 5:08 PM GMT
    I think all of us that have posted here to this point should get together via e-mail and talk about our experiences and expectations for our futures.

    We could be our own support and cheerleader group. What do you guys think?
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    Oct 30, 2010 6:06 PM GMT
    Count me in! Ive been married twice, have 3 kids. I know where your coming from man! If I can help in any way let me know.

    Ive searched for a good gay fathers site online but doesnt seem to be one. Its a shame because there are so many of us out there & could really help each other out. Hope your doing ok man, keep your chin up dude.
  • Daknee

    Posts: 67

    Oct 30, 2010 6:17 PM GMT
    Add me to this list. Although never married I was in a15 year relationship with the same woman. Previous to that I only dated women. Why? Because I was never truly sure myself. I was only after the death of my ltr girlfriend that I began to fully realize why we never married and the full scope of my sexuality. For me it was better late than never.
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    Oct 30, 2010 6:28 PM GMT
    28 years of marriage and separated now for approx 4 weeks, living now with my partner whom I've know for almost 2 years now. It was time to step up and make the change but is is very very difficult. My two sons don't want to talk to me (aged 27 and. 25). So a lot to deal with in the coming year.

    Hit me up anytime.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 30, 2010 6:47 PM GMT
    Was married over 20 years and have 4 kids. My wife checked out of our marriage physically and emotionally as the kids were in their teenage years. So like many here, I stepped up and raised them. They are OK with dad being gay, even my two military sons. My daughters are always trying set me up with "hot" guys...lol

    So righton57, ever need to vent or ask question, give me a shout. You're not alone and don't do this transition alone. Everyone that's responding has something to offer....Peace
  • vj2004t

    Posts: 203

    Oct 30, 2010 7:37 PM GMT
    Married 20 years hated and blamed myself for not comeing out sooner was gay all the time. I had a good divorce and we remain friends comeing out to family was not as hard as I thought they still loved my as I was. LOL but sometimes I think they would like to push me in the closet ha ha val
  • toybrian

    Posts: 395

    Oct 30, 2010 7:44 PM GMT
    Right, going through that now also and will be seperested soon and hope to be divorced by next year...Also have kids so hope they will not choose sides...any questions you have you can write me here to talk to or at toydelivery@aol.com...
    You and BeachBiman are both great looking guys...have a good week ahead and a safe road ahead..Brian..
  • baldone

    Posts: 826

    Oct 30, 2010 7:52 PM GMT
    married 31 years,divorced now about 2.5...2 kids, son currently lives with me, so is kinda hampering the social life....always kinda new but like all of you tried to bury it, wish it away,pray it away but 05 just could do it anymore....devesatated my ex, but we seem ok now
    any help, chat, opinions let me know
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    Oct 30, 2010 8:23 PM GMT
    Yep...me too....not married, but lived together for several years and have 3 sons..I got custody... I came out at age 36 am now 50....she is insane and is in and out of mental hospitals....icon_lol.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 30, 2010 8:55 PM GMT
    As I pure homosexual I can categorically inform you gay men don't marry women straight and bisexual men do, not gay men. Thats why we are gay because we don't have to have sex with a women to know man on man is the hottest any days.

    How do you ex-plane the bisexual men who have used more then one women to wed them so they can hid behind the wife and kids to advance their own career, and reputation, then when this done and they have no use of the wives anymore they decade them, have an open homosexual relasionship, and now want to be know as gay. Sorry but there is no I in us, nor do I accept them a a true blue brother either; illegitimate maybe.

    But I also understand how a person born into position, and with many expectations, can feel obliged, to apses the masses because of what is expected of them.

    Oh did I say "gay men just don't have wives."


    Also what is the political advantage for those to label a bisexual man who lives the straight lifestyle as gay, when they are clearly bisexual.
  • CHANGING

    Posts: 4

    Oct 30, 2010 8:56 PM GMT
    I am also in this group. I have been married for 27 years and have two great kids. We are in the process of getting a divorce and although i don't claim to have all the answers, I will be glad to answer any questions and compair notes. Hit me up bud......icon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 30, 2010 8:58 PM GMT
    You know this topic has so much to do with why a number of people who think homosexuality is a choice, because they may of grown up with this guy, went to school, church, and played football with him, was best man at his wedding, and then 30 years latter he wants to be known as a gay man, when He has never been one of them in the first place.
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    Oct 30, 2010 9:18 PM GMT
    aunty_jack saidYou know this topic has so much to do with why a number of people who think homosexuality is a choice, because they may of grown up with this guy, went to school, church, and played football with him, was best man at his wedding, and then 30 years latter he wants to be known as a gay man, when He has never been one of them in the first place.



    Most confusing comment ever.