WHY DO YOU MAKE THE GUY YOU ACTUALLY LIKE WAIT FOR SEX?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 02, 2010 12:50 AM GMT
    Why do many guys make the man that they actually like WAIT for sex after days/weeks/months of dating when they give it away quickly to a NSA hookup they meet online or at a bar with no hesitation?

    What makes sex with them special if the next guy can get it without all the work?

    For example: This one guy told me if he meets a guy at the club and they have hookup sex after, he never calls him again...but if its a guy he likes that he meets at a house party or through a friend, he makes him wait for it just to make sure he's serious about dating...True story
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    Nov 02, 2010 1:10 AM GMT
    I'm assuming because they feel the guy will have zero respect for them if they give it up right away. /shrugs/
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    Nov 02, 2010 1:18 AM GMT
    Because people are idiots?
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    Nov 02, 2010 1:31 AM GMT
    Unfounded7 gave it up to me on our first date, I still respect him... sorta. ;)
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    Nov 02, 2010 2:11 AM GMT
    KardioKing saidUnfounded7 gave it up to me on our first date, I still respect him... sorta. ;)

    Your respect isn't what I'm interested in. icon_twisted.gif
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    Nov 02, 2010 2:13 AM GMT
    They wanna make sure he has money first.
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    Nov 02, 2010 8:42 AM GMT
    Sometimes I do that too icon_smile.gif
    I find it to be one of the weird things about me...

    When I am hooking up with someone, all I want is sex - so there really isn't anything else to do.
    However, when I am dating someone I really like, I try to take it slower because I've had bad experience with rushing things... not only sex, but everything. Besides what happened to good old DATING??? icon_smile.gif You know... going out to see movies, dinners, bars... then kissing, holding someone's hand. Doing those cute shy flirts when you are not sure you'll be flirted back with.
    I mean - I like the ritual of dating, the game... once you fuck it's all done. icon_smile.gif
    Besides sometimes I just want some reassurance that we are both hoping for something special and I am not a boy toy in his mind icon_smile.gif
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    Nov 02, 2010 2:17 PM GMT
    I think some us still believe in some archaic notion that the person is damaged goods or "used" and not worthy of a relationship.

    I find it strange how sex, which I believe to be something very intimate has become a shield which we use to prevent from anyone getting to know us.
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    Nov 02, 2010 2:20 PM GMT


    Isn't it obvious?

    Does a prostitute make you 'wait' ?

    You don't 'give' sex, you experience it with another guy.
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    Nov 02, 2010 2:20 PM GMT
    Indy404 saidWhy do many guys make the man that they actually like WAIT for sex after days/weeks/months of dating when they give it away quickly to a NSA hookup they meet online or at a bar with no hesitation?

    What makes sex with them special if the next guy can get it without all the work?

    For example: This one guy told me if he meets a guy at the club and they have hookup sex after, he never calls him again...but if its a guy he likes that he meets at a house party or through a friend, he makes him wait for it just to make sure he's serious about dating...True story


    Because nobody wants to explore a relationship with a whore. Well, most people don't.
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    Nov 02, 2010 2:39 PM GMT
    This is interesting:
    I'm detecting two different outlooks.

    1. NSA sex, i.e. hookups, is typical of m2m interactions.

    2. NSA sex is characteristic of whorish behavior.

  • SoDakGuy

    Posts: 1862

    Nov 02, 2010 2:44 PM GMT
    I only make guys wait for sex when they use ALL CAPS IN THE TITLE OF THE FORUM. icon_twisted.gif
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    Nov 02, 2010 2:45 PM GMT
    Thisuserexists said

    Isn't it obvious?

    Does a prostitute make you 'wait' ?

    You don't 'give' sex, you experience it with another guy.


    Wow, that was deep. icon_rolleyes.gif
  • Karnage

    Posts: 704

    Nov 02, 2010 2:50 PM GMT
    I would fall in the category of those who want to wait if it's someone I actually like. The way I think about it, if I want to date a guy, I want to make sure that we have a connection outside of the bedroom too. A lot of people end up in relationships where they confuse a good sexual partner with a good relationship partner, and I don't want to risk that for myself.
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    Nov 02, 2010 2:58 PM GMT
    Because if I like him for more than a hook up I usually wanna see if the other guy feels the same way. If all he wants is sex he won't come back for a second date and then I don't feel used. Easy enough.

    If I'm horny and just looking for a hook up what's the point of waiting?
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    Nov 04, 2010 4:45 PM GMT
    Hi guys,

    Please can you remember that sex should always be safe and with so many diseases out there at the moment, it is dangerous for you to not wear a condom. If any of you think that you may have HIV or an STI, then a great website that my partner gave me is below. Please check it out.

    http://www.freedomhealth.co.uk/

    icon_smile.gif
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    Nov 04, 2010 5:16 PM GMT
    Because a lot of guys are insecure. It's one thing to hook up with someone and think nothing of it. It's another thing to have sex with someone you actually like, if for whatever reason they reject you after that, it's going to actually hurt.
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    Nov 04, 2010 8:38 PM GMT
    I don't hink you guys are gettting the questions was asking...

    I'm asking about the logic in making someone that you actually like wait for sex like its something special but a stranger can quickly get it with no "work".

    From what I'm reading in these comments you guys are saying:
    "Sex with me is easy to get if I am horny and I don't like you...BUT if I'm interested in you, you have to wait for sex unlike the guy I hooked up with whose last name I don't even know...Basically, sex with me has lower value when it comes to hookups but I arbitrarily raise its value when it comes to dating."
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    Nov 05, 2010 4:27 AM GMT
    Indy404 saidI don't hink you guys are gettting the questions was asking...

    I'm asking about the logic in making someone that you actually like wait for sex like its something special but a stranger can quickly get it with no "work".

    From what I'm reading in these comments you guys are saying:
    "Sex with me is easy to get if I am horny and I don't like you...BUT if I'm interested in you, you have to wait for sex unlike the guy I hooked up with whose last name I don't even know...Basically, sex with me has lower value when it comes to hookups but I arbitrarily raise its value when it comes to dating."


    When you say it that way the logic is all in perception. I understand what you’re saying if you’re just looking at sex and your body as a product with a set value it wouldn’t make logical sense to give it to someone meaningless so easily. But I think it boils down to how you want people to perceive you. A hookup is basically saying your attractive enough to F%@#. But someone you actually like and would want to have a relationship with you want to be seen more than just being a physical being. That's why I never understood why someone would want to be a trophy wife; looks do eventually fade. Yes you can still look great and be old, BUT if your looks are all you have to offer in a relationship that's pretty sad.

    To add onto this in a hookup you've accepted the fact your just there to provide mutual pleasure. But when it comes to someone you care about you aren't going to accept the fact you're just there for sex you want a connection: emotional, intellectual, similar interest/values, spiritual, etc.
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    Nov 05, 2010 4:40 AM GMT
    Funny thing is.. If what you're looking for is more than just a hookup.. and say you really like someone and you end up having sex.. chances of you seeing that guy are what?



    Exactly.

    Personally if i like someone i won't have sex not because i don't want to give it up.. More over i'd love to give it up if it's someone i like and am attracted to. However, if my mindset is in the mode of looking for more.. I'd like to get to know someone and shake their hands a couple of times before shaking their dick.

    I'd like to know if someone is more than just looks. If im in the mind set of more than just a hookup, i wouldn't and don't appreciate being treated like a peice of meat.

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    Nov 05, 2010 5:05 AM GMT
    Samm77 saidFunny thing is.. If what you're looking for is more than just a hookup.. and say you really like someone and you end up having sex.. chances of you seeing that guy are what?



    Exactly.

    Personally if i like someone i won't have sex not because i don't want to give it up.. More over i'd love to give it up if it's someone i like and am attracted to. However, if my mindset is in the mode of looking for more.. I'd like to get to know someone and shake their hands a couple of times before shaking their dick.

    I'd like to know if someone is more than just looks. If im in the mind set of more than just a hookup, i wouldn't and don't appreciate being treated like a peice of meat.




    one time i was dating a guy and because we didn't have sex he thought i wasn't interested in him and pretty much dumped me. it was like our third date. so you're damned if you have sex and your damned if you don't.
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    Nov 05, 2010 5:09 AM GMT
    No you're never damned icon_smile.gif He just wasn't for you and didn't deserve you. So there icon_smile.gif
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    Nov 05, 2010 5:17 AM GMT
    DanceNFightR said
    Samm77 saidFunny thing is.. If what you're looking for is more than just a hookup.. and say you really like someone and you end up having sex.. chances of you seeing that guy are what?



    Exactly.

    Personally if i like someone i won't have sex not because i don't want to give it up.. More over i'd love to give it up if it's someone i like and am attracted to. However, if my mindset is in the mode of looking for more.. I'd like to get to know someone and shake their hands a couple of times before shaking their dick.

    I'd like to know if someone is more than just looks. If im in the mind set of more than just a hookup, i wouldn't and don't appreciate being treated like a peice of meat.




    one time i was dating a guy and because we didn't have sex he thought i wasn't interested in him and pretty much dumped me. it was like our third date. so you're damned if you have sex and your damned if you don't.


    That guy was an idiot not all gay men are like that.
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    Nov 05, 2010 5:20 AM GMT
    My first date with my husband ended in sex. We couldn't wait for dinner to get done. If you're going to be in a relationship, "giving it up" isn't going to change the outcome (unless you're a bad lay).
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    Nov 05, 2010 5:24 AM GMT
    mickeytopogigio saidMy first date with my husband ended in sex. We couldn't wait for dinner to get done. If you're going to be in a relationship, "giving it up" isn't going to change the outcome (unless you're a bad lay).


    HAHAHA I like this. But the poster asked what the reasons were behind someone waiting to have sex with someone they like.