Advice needed based on personal experiences and sciences behind anal sex

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    Nov 21, 2010 4:03 PM GMT
    Hi guys! Ok, so i am with my bf for 1 month now and we havent had anal sex. Hes top and I haven't tried it before. I've been fingered and i've attempted using dildos. But its so painful. The pain is not a stretching kinda pain, but more of like a very sensitve feeling. The kinda feeling (brace yourself for the gross part), you get when you ate extremely spicy food or when you are having a bad tummy ache. I dont know if there are other guys who feel like this. But more lube doesnt quite help in this case. Also, for me i am fine not having sex but for him penetration is important. But is there a chance that i am not meant to enjoy being penetrated?

    Also, how does it feel like when being penetrated? Is it a good feeling? Isnt it better to fuck than to get fucked cos even though the prostate gland can be better stimulated from the rear, wouldnt the front be the one that makes you attain the ultimate orgasm?
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    Nov 21, 2010 4:10 PM GMT
    Never been into anal sex here, never will. For some people it's not a turn on. You should tell him that.
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    Nov 22, 2010 12:45 PM GMT
    Yea i guess...But i havent tried it so ill never know till i do...
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    Dec 15, 2010 4:02 AM GMT
    He's not doing it right darling.
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    Dec 16, 2010 7:36 AM GMT
    ridin_solo88 saidHi guys! Ok, so i am with my bf for 1 month now and we havent had anal sex. Hes top and I haven't tried it before. I've been fingered and i've attempted using dildos. But its so painful. The pain is not a stretching kinda pain, but more of like a very sensitve feeling. The kinda feeling (brace yourself for the gross part), you get when you ate extremely spicy food or when you are having a bad tummy ache. I dont know if there are other guys who feel like this. But more lube doesnt quite help in this case. Also, for me i am fine not having sex but for him penetration is important. But is there a chance that i am not meant to enjoy being penetrated?

    Also, how does it feel like when being penetrated? Is it a good feeling? Isnt it better to fuck than to get fucked cos even though the prostate gland can be better stimulated from the rear, wouldnt the front be the one that makes you attain the ultimate orgasm?


    From my own experience, I have to say that when I received anal sex the first couple of times, it was not enjoyable, and I felt a lot of pain. However, I was in a 6 year long term relationship with a guy who enjoyed giving anal sex very much. So I pretty much bottomed for him and over time I just had gotten used to the feeling of being penetrated, and eventually I grew to enjoy the feeling of having him inside me. So yes it can be a good feeling!

    Because my love for him grew more and more over time, when he penetrated me, I felt an incredible physical and emotional connection. But I didn't feel this way until we were dating for a long time. At the beginning, I only felt physical pain.

    You can either tell him that you're just not into it, or you just need to give yourself some time to try things out. Who knows, you might grow to enjoy it as I did. He may need to go very slowly at first and you may need to practice with smaller dildo's to begin with, so he will have to be patient too. In my case, I never used dildo's and my bf at the time had a dick that was 7 inches long. Eventually you may find a position where you'll feel good as a bottom. For me it was lying on my back. As far as lube was concerned, we did not use lube. I pretty much just sucked him and then he'd just go inside me.

    Also a good policy is if you feel "full" down there, you guys should not have anal sex.
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    Dec 17, 2010 5:07 AM GMT
    Anal is definitely something that takes getting used to. Don't feel pressured to do it until you're ready, and if you want to prep yourself for it I'd say try some foreplay exercises that sort "warm-up" your anal muscles. So many people just skip out on foreplay these days, it's kinda sad but foreplay is like warming up before you workout. It sets the tone and makes sure you're muscles are relaxed. Try just lightly massaging your anus with lube. Then give fingering yourself a try, or have him do it. And don't poke at your anus, you've gotta gently slide it in. You can also try a butt-plug, something small.

    It's not the most comfortable thing at first but it can definitely be pleasing if done right. And you've gotta prepare your mind for it as well. Your body will probably register anything going in as unusual at first and you'll tend to tense up. Just relax, breathe, and take it slow.