Tricky 3some situation...

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 28, 2010 10:14 AM GMT
    So, I had a 3some last night with 2 guys. It started out fun but then one of them announced they had sex raw, no condoms. I felt like the party pooper when I said I used condoms. They seemed to think unprotected sex was no big deal at all. I was freaked out and had to leave. Guess I should have found out earlier what they were in to. But on the guy's profile it said safe sex only. When did condoms become a dirty word?
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    Nov 28, 2010 12:47 PM GMT
    it's not that condom is a dirty word (majority of guys care about safe sex i like to believe), it's just that those prats are liars and weren't upfront with you or likely anyone else. perhaps they think that in the hotness of the moment you'd give in to raw sex.

    i live in shepherd's bush by the way. ;)
  • Bunjamon

    Posts: 3161

    Nov 28, 2010 1:06 PM GMT
    What's tricky about this? You did the right thing by leaving.
  • DCEric

    Posts: 3713

    Nov 28, 2010 1:22 PM GMT
    Bunjamon saidWhat's tricky about this? You did the right thing by leaving.

    So good it was worth repeating.
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    Nov 28, 2010 3:10 PM GMT
    Safe sex is a tricky word. One person thinks it is condoms all the time, others think it is pulling out before cumming, having sex with only people they think are 'clean', etc.

    My suggestion is to have the discussion, oral, condoms, swallowing, with clothes and lights on.. makes for less trouble later on
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 28, 2010 3:24 PM GMT
    Bigsmiles saidSafe sex is a tricky word. One person thinks it is condoms all the time, others think it is pulling out before cumming, having sex with only people they think are 'clean', etc.

    My suggestion is to have the discussion, oral, condoms, swallowing, with clothes and lights on.. makes for less trouble later on

    You're correct, though "safe sex" is supposed to only mean ONE thing. So that when I was single and tricking, doing 3-somes or even larger group scenes, including bathhouses, I always said first that I used condoms. Very simple sentence: "I'll be using condoms."

    If the others didn't agree to that, then good-bye. I always have choices, among them staying negative, which I still am.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 28, 2010 3:27 PM GMT
    Agree with the rest, you did the right thing.
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Nov 28, 2010 3:31 PM GMT
    I would tend to agree with much of whats been said above. While I've been invited to participate in threesomes, I think it would be a little odd for me, even if I were single, but if I did, I doubt if there would be an awkwardness with any sex as it would have been very clear from the get go that condoms would be the only
    way.
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    Nov 28, 2010 3:32 PM GMT
    DCEric said
    Bunjamon saidWhat's tricky about this? You did the right thing by leaving.

    So good it was worth repeating.


    and again.
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    Nov 28, 2010 3:43 PM GMT
    redheadguy saidSo, I had a 3some last night with 2 guys. It started out fun but then one of them announced they had sex raw, no condoms. I felt like the party pooper when I said I used condoms. They seemed to think unprotected sex was no big deal at all. I was freaked out and had to leave. Guess I should have found out earlier what they were in to. But on the guy's profile it said safe sex only. When did condoms become a dirty word?


    It's only a dirty word to dumb-asses. They would have happily put your lights out. I've heard this while out and about and in posts on RJ about trusting friends and sleeping around with them and not using condoms because the posters feel they know these friends and trust them well enough that they are clean.

    Foolhardy in the extreme.

    -Doug
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    Nov 28, 2010 5:16 PM GMT
    It was good you walked out!
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    Nov 28, 2010 5:31 PM GMT
    costaki said
    DCEric said
    Bunjamon saidWhat's tricky about this? You did the right thing by leaving.

    So good it was worth repeating.


    and again.


    Yeah, fair play to you for leaving.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 28, 2010 5:32 PM GMT
    costaki said
    DCEric said
    Bunjamon saidWhat's tricky about this? You did the right thing by leaving.

    So good it was worth repeating.


    and again.


    One more time.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 28, 2010 6:10 PM GMT
    DJdorchester said
    costaki said
    DCEric said
    Bunjamon saidWhat's tricky about this? You did the right thing by leaving.

    So good it was worth repeating.


    and again.


    One more time.



    and from the top
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 28, 2010 6:22 PM GMT
    I don't even have to say anything. This video pretty much sums up what I would say. lol.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 28, 2010 6:43 PM GMT
    They used the old "bait and switch" tactic on you. The safe sex announcement in the profile is just a way to get customers. I would get tested if you did anything with them that would put you at risk for acquiring HIV. For those two to not have HIV after their deceiving tricks would be a statistical miracle.
  • LuckyGuyKC

    Posts: 2080

    Nov 28, 2010 6:44 PM GMT
    You did the ONLY sane and rational thing to do.

    Staying was not an option.

    Condoms are not optional unless you have been a relationship with one person and neither of you play outside the relationship. This my truth, but I understand and respect that others play by other rules.

    People do lie and it is harmful to everyone including themselves.

    Tick, Tick, Tick, ...... do you hear the bomb?
  • Kage

    Posts: 707

    Nov 28, 2010 6:45 PM GMT
    redheadguy saidSo, I had a 3some last night with 2 guys. It started out fun but then one of them announced they had sex raw, no condoms. I felt like the party pooper when I said I used condoms. They seemed to think unprotected sex was no big deal at all. I was freaked out and had to leave. Guess I should have found out earlier what they were in to. But on the guy's profile it said safe sex only. When did condoms become a dirty word?


    This is the biggest problem with 3somes especially if you are the 3rd to a couple.
    You just have to stand your ground regarding safe sex and if they keep pushing you, get out of there.

    Unfortunately "safe sex" on profiles do not always mean safe sex.
    For some reason it seems to be used a tool to get guys to come over.
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    Nov 28, 2010 6:51 PM GMT
    DCEric said
    Bunjamon saidWhat's tricky about this? You did the right thing by leaving.

    So good it was worth repeating.


    AGREE!
    And repeat again to get the point across...

    NO GLOVE, NO LOVE.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 28, 2010 6:54 PM GMT
    It's strange how rational they made it sound. The guy who invited me over said he'd known his friend for months and they'd had sex in three different countries, Thailand, Singapore and Australia. Like that made it all safe. They were also tweaking, if u know what I mean. Definitely not a good combination.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 28, 2010 7:09 PM GMT
    redheadguy saidSo, I had a 3some last night with 2 guys. It started out fun but then one of them announced they had sex raw, no condoms. I felt like the party pooper when I said I used condoms. They seemed to think unprotected sex was no big deal at all. I was freaked out and had to leave. Guess I should have found out earlier what they were in to. But on the guy's profile it said safe sex only. When did condoms become a dirty word?


    Good move for using sound judgment. Two irresponsible dumb fucks shouldn't make for a third. They're the sort of folks that you should have nothing to do with. They don't care about anything other than themselves, and the current moment.

    They're drug heads.

    I suspect you could upgrade your associations.

    You're to be commended for being judgmental and MAKING THE RIGHT CHOICE. At your age, you shouldn't be questioning your own good judgment.

    Surely you can do better than a couple of tweaked out whores?

    They're nothing other than irresponsible junkies. Good move.

    You're not 16 any more.

    Nothing tricky about the situation at all. You should have never been in it to begin with.
  • MrPapo317

    Posts: 515

    Nov 28, 2010 7:12 PM GMT
    redheadguy saidIt's strange how rational they made it sound. The guy who invited me over said he'd known his friend for months and they'd had sex in three different countries, Thailand, Singapore and Australia. Like that made it all safe. They were also tweaking, if u know what I mean. Definitely not a good combination.


    Even more of a reason to get out of there.
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    Nov 28, 2010 7:48 PM GMT
    I agree with everyone, You did the right thing, I have done the same in the past. I tend to blame myself a lot, not asking the right questions or taking what is written on profile for truth. I have learned that you need to ask questions and never feel bad for getting out of a situation that you feel uncomfortable, after all no one else will protect you, you need to protect yourself. Anyway, I've done the same thing in the past and walked out and would do it in a heartbeat again.
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    Nov 28, 2010 7:50 PM GMT
    One more vote for saying that you did the right thing.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 28, 2010 7:59 PM GMT
    I agree with you leaving.

    Especially if you just met them and dont know them all that well.

    Safe sex is a must