To all you guys who think bare-backing is not a big deal.

  • NerdLifter

    Posts: 1509

    Nov 28, 2010 9:31 PM GMT
    It IS a big deal, and you are imbeciles to think it is an 'okay' sexual activity to do with strangers.

    Sorry, I just got hit on, AGAIN, by a cute guy who does this kind of vastly unsafe activity. I had to tell him that was a huge deal breaker for me and left him standing there to ponder his idiocy.

    It immensely disturbs me how ubiquitous this behavior is among gay youth in this area. HOW stupid can these kids be? No matter how much you try to drill into their brain the science behind STD transmission, they are being horny IDIOTS.

    I had to vent; I just cannot believe how often guys do this. Makes you lose faith that HIV will ever get under control if there are this many idiots running around complacently practicing extremely unsafe sex.
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    Nov 28, 2010 9:33 PM GMT
    I find it stunning as well. It is SUCH a turn off when people want to BB, or safe sex "needs discussion". No it doesn´t. And you know they NEVER have STI tests. Fucking twats.

  • Import

    Posts: 7190

    Nov 28, 2010 9:35 PM GMT
    it makes me think that the person has no regard for his own personal safety. Like doesn't he care about himself? let alone me?

    I mean, whats to stop him from infecting me with HIV? Why should I trust him because he wants to get his rocks off
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    Nov 28, 2010 10:10 PM GMT


    Many of them were raised to hate themselves. There is self-sabotage at work here, I think.

    -Doug
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    Nov 28, 2010 11:37 PM GMT
    meninlove said

    Many of them were raised to hate themselves. There is self-sabotage at work here, I think.

    -Doug
    That's what I think, too.
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    Nov 28, 2010 11:42 PM GMT
    Soo sad for them .....icon_sad.gif
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    Nov 28, 2010 11:45 PM GMT
    Young men feel they're invincible, that threats to health don't apply to them. And if they and the other guy don't feel or look sick, then they can't be infected.

    They imagine a virus in terms of the common cold or flu, the only illnesses many of them know, unable to accept that HIV can produce no symptoms at first, a silent & invisible disease that without voluntary testing may take years to make itself known. But infectious all the same, and just as dangerous whether asymptomatic or not.
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    Nov 29, 2010 12:36 AM GMT
    YEP!...BB is a DUMB thing to do when you are doing hook ups and one night stands.. or even new into a relationship.....
    I broke up with my last BF because he wouldn't respect my wishes about playing safe.....and actually he was the one that was the bottom.... he did this 4 times to me.....It DID FEEL AWESOME, but I was PISSED each time and we had long angry exchanges over this......I called it quits after the 4th time....he was 25..so I wonder if this is a "generational" difference on how HIV and AIDS are perceived? My generation remembers the deaths and losses, this generation of 20-somethings never saw the massive losses and now look at this as a disease to be lived with and managed.....
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    Nov 29, 2010 12:39 AM GMT
    i understand you my friend and i am with you icon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gif
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    Nov 29, 2010 12:42 AM GMT
    I believe that a large part of the reason for this is that people in my generation, Generation Y, and to a lesser degree, Generation X, may no longer see unprotected sex and STD's as risks because of all the new medication available. They see men who are HIV positive and still having unprotected sex and think that since they are 'healthy' and still able to have unprotected sex, it must be alright. This then leads to a feeling of being invincible, almost super human, where NOTHING will harm you or hurt you. Not only that, but the predominance of bareback pornography may have something to do with it as well.
  • Kinneticbrian

    Posts: 230

    Nov 29, 2010 12:54 AM GMT
    Barebacking is the most stupid thing in the world and is an absolute deal breaker for me under any circumstances.

    One of my friends is dating a guy who lied to him about how he ended up with HIV/AIDS. At first he told my friend that he got it when a guy slipped the condom off during sex and he didn't realize the guy did it. Later he admitted that he hooked up and did nothing but bareback all the time and has no idea who infected him. He's 27 and on HAART Therapy to try to control the viral load.

    I'd have walked out on him right then and there. My friend thinks I am unreasonable, but as I told him - we have known for nearly 30 years how to lower or prevent the risk to HIV and this guy went out and asked for it and now wants all kinds of sympathy. He enjoys being a victim to the point he played you and lied to you. He was 21 when he was infected. Bottom line - he ignored the consequences. And in Chicago with the amount of free condoms available, there is never an excuse for barebacking.

    For crying out loud guys - if you bareback - STOP before it is too late.
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    Nov 29, 2010 1:11 AM GMT
    A wise man once said:
    pokeandskeet saidPeople take this whole HIV thing out of proportion...Half of yall on here got it now and dont even know it or wont admit it...It is ok to have sex because half of you muthafuckas on here fuck everyday so stop with the bullshit talking about you all are scared to fuck and that you masturbate more...Stop lying ! fooling only yourselves..Im a real muthafucka who tells it like it is and if ya dont like it then fall the fuck back..but its normal for gay men to fuck or have sex however you wanna put it.just wear a damn condom..its just that simple and if it break you assholes usually know it but ya keep fucking because it feels good and you dont want to pull out or the bottom guy dont want you to..anyway and if you do catch some shit or think you got something go get treated ....(That Simple) not like you are gonna die and besides HIV is not like it use to be ..YOU CAN LIVE NOW! I know all this because my mom passed a long time ago with it and I researched a lot so enjoy life,have fun and be happy[i]ITALIC TEXT GOES HEREicon_rolleyes.gif


    Yeah........ right.
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    Nov 29, 2010 1:30 AM GMT
    This is an interesting aside, but a good read for those so inclined. Some of my younger friends participated in this.

    http://www.informaworld.com/smpp/section?content=a793154625&fulltext=713240928#references
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    Nov 29, 2010 1:33 AM GMT
    Young men seem to think they are immortal. It's too bad so many are so self destructive.
  • Daknee

    Posts: 67

    Nov 29, 2010 1:42 AM GMT
    Import saidit makes me think that the person has no regard for his own personal safety. Like doesn't he care about himself? let alone me?

    I mean, whats to stop him from infecting me with HIV? Why should I trust him because he wants to get his rocks off


    EXCELLENT point about not caring for himself let alone a parter! I like that thinking.
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    Nov 29, 2010 1:46 AM GMT
    Having gotten gonorrhea at the Denver Swim Club fifteen years ago and hepatitis B from my auto mechanic five years ago icon_evil.gif and lost my little brother (and many other friends) to AIDS icon_twisted.gif I have no desire to play "russian roulette" with six bullets in the chamber. icon_exclaim.gif
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    Nov 29, 2010 1:52 AM GMT
    I've encountered all kinds of lame justifications for why guys think it's ok to bareback. The weirdest was one guy I met who said he was an advanced Reiki master and that it was impossible for him to get sick.
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    Nov 29, 2010 2:07 AM GMT
    MenschPress saidI've encountered all kinds of lame justifications for why guys think it's ok to bareback. The weirdest was one guy I met who said he was an advanced Reiki master and that it was impossible for him to get sick.


    Oh no you dih eh. You invoked the Reiki! It was almost dead!
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    Nov 29, 2010 2:10 AM GMT
    MenschPress saidI've encountered all kinds of lame justifications for why guys think it's ok to bareback. The weirdest was one guy I met who said he was an advanced Reiki master and that it was impossible for him to get sick.


    I think that only goes for Jedi masters, not Reiki masters. They ain't got no force icon_wink.gif
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    Nov 29, 2010 2:12 AM GMT
    MenschPress saidI've encountered all kinds of lame justifications for why guys think it's ok to bareback. The weirdest was one guy I met who said he was an advanced Reiki master and that it was impossible for him to get sick.


    Who needs Reiki when you have the power of the best selling book The Secret-
  • Moishendlishu...

    Posts: 435

    Nov 29, 2010 2:25 AM GMT
    Barebacking simply put is retarded. I used to do it all the time when I was in a commited relationship...problem is you can't trust people as I found out. Plus, HIV is one thing (blown completely out of proportion by young guys as it's harder to have diabetes, but still nobody wants it) but HPV, Herpes, and the other STD's also exist. I get that it feels so much better than safe sex, but bottom line, it's simply not worth the risk...and people who do it with a stranger or some one nighter online...are BEGGING for some serious shit to go down.
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    Nov 29, 2010 2:43 AM GMT
    mickeytopogigio said
    MenschPress saidI've encountered all kinds of lame justifications for why guys think it's ok to bareback. The weirdest was one guy I met who said he was an advanced Reiki master and that it was impossible for him to get sick.


    Oh no you dih eh. You invoked the Reiki! It was almost dead!


    Not invoking anything; merely sharing a true personal anecdote which is directly relevant to the thread topic.

    icon_smile.gif
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    Nov 29, 2010 3:21 AM GMT
    Some guys like to bb with strangers. For some it is a turn on... fueled by the bb porn industry. Bug chasers... you will not change their minds.

    Simply put: You are going to change the gay community 100%--it's impossible.

    However, if you find this distrubing, stop typying bitchy holier than thou comments and figure out a way to resolve the problem--talking about it on RJ will do nothing.

    We need comprehensive sex-ed reform which includes homosexual activites. BB should be saved as a wedding gift for those comitted couples who feel comfortable with the practise. BB porn studios need to step up and stop/alter their destructive businesses.

    With my lack of information and resources (along with my ignorance on gay sex) it's a miracle I never got into bb as a teenager. There is a lot of misinformation out there on safer sex.
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    Nov 29, 2010 3:46 AM GMT
    What scares me more than anything is to have a partner someday who lies to me about his HIV status. Even if he was tested negative, I'd still always use protection. It's so important to me.

    Even so, the mere thought of a liar about that stuff, it almost drives me away from wanting to be with anyone at all. It's thoughts like those that make me thankful for my virginity, knowing that it is the one thing that keeps me completely safe and 100% STD free.

    To think some guys out there can be so reckless, so uncaring and irresponsible...who have no regard for anyone's safety, only because they feel "betrayed" by the world for having been themselves infected in the first place...
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    Nov 29, 2010 4:01 AM GMT
    LMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Post of the Day.
    Congrats icon_wink.gif
    conscienti1984 saidSome guys like to bb with strangers. For some it is a turn on... fueled by the bb porn industry. Bug chasers... you will not change their minds.

    Simply put: You are going to change the gay community 100%--it's impossible.

    However, if you find this distrubing, stop typying bitchy holier than thou comments and figure out a way to resolve the problem--talking about it on RJ will do nothing.

    We need comprehensive sex-ed reform which includes homosexual activites. BB should be saved as a wedding gift for those comitted couples who feel comfortable with the practise. BB porn studios need to step up and stop/alter their destructive businesses.

    With my lack of information and resources (along with my ignorance on gay sex) it's a miracle I never got into bb as a teenager. There is a lot of misinformation out there on safer sex.