came out to my friend

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    Dec 13, 2010 2:24 AM GMT
    There's nothing interesting in what I am going to write about...I just felt like I should *report* it here. Plus I dont have any gay friends to tell this to. :-)

    A girl friend of mine has been going through a rough time and always wants to hang out with me. She wants to go out to dinners one-on-one, go to clubs, speed dating etc etc and I almost always felt uncomfortable when she asked me if I want to go speed dating or dancing with her. But I did it for her...The whole situation was going crazy since it seemed like we were dating and she "might" end up thinking of our relationship as a romantic one. After being tired of making excuses all the time, and trying not to jeopardize our friendship further, I decided to come out to her last night.

    This was a big deal to me because she is the first person I have come out to. No on else knows.

    I made sure I had sobered up after the club, also made sure we went to a restaurant in our own cars in case she doesnt take it well so that we wouldnt have to drive in one car after that.

    I somehow took our conversation into "keeping secrets" and asked her if she can keep a secret if I told her one...she was quiet for a second, and then said "I know it". I asked her what she thinks it is, but she wouldnt tell me fearing it may offend me.

    Anyway, I came out to her in plain words and she said she was suspecting it. (I laughed when she tried to dirty dance with me. we never made out at clubs no matter how wasted I was. I was always against the idea of going to speed dating. and I once went out with a guy friend and said no when she asked if she could join us, etc etc. she would have to be stupid to have not guessed). Well, she took it very well and was very supportive.

    That's it. Thanks if read this till the end. Sorry for the long post.

    :-)
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    Dec 13, 2010 2:57 AM GMT
    navi_leinad saidLucky, I have this straight guy friend who I've been thinking of coming out to. The bad thing is that I'm not sure how close we are, so I think if I tell him too soon he would push me away and well he's like becoming a very good friend to me. Bad thing is he doesn't like gay people so I'm damned if I don't (since he wants to head to a strip club for his bday) and damned if I do since well I'm pretty sure that it would cut me out of his life or at least I'm worried I might be. Anyways that;s good to hear you made a step towards coming out to friends/family. Next step another friend haha


    My best friend is the biggest homophobe I know. I havent come out to him yet. But I think it will change his view on homosexuals once I tell him.

    I know what you are talking about. Just take your time.
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    Dec 13, 2010 3:00 AM GMT
    Think of the poor girl. She's going thru a tough time and then the one guy who is supportive turns out to be gay. She must think God hates her.
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    Dec 13, 2010 4:59 AM GMT
    Integrity is a very liberating thing.

    Now, on with the rest of your life.
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    Dec 13, 2010 5:26 AM GMT
    Caslon16000 saidThink of the poor girl. She's going thru a tough time and then the one guy who is supportive turns out to be gay. She must think God hates her.


    I know it sucks. But I am glad I did it now rather than later. One of the reasons why I chose to come out clean was because I felt something was happening. She once asked me why I dont like her. I was caught off guard and nothing sensible came out of my mouth. She laughed it off as a joke, but I know that was a real question Last night, she wanted to plan the new years eve with me.
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    Dec 13, 2010 5:28 AM GMT
    navi_leinad said
    Advaya said

    My best friend is the biggest homophobe I know. I havent come out to him yet. But I think it will change his view on homosexuals once I tell him.

    I know what you are talking about. Just take your time.

    Its fine, I know the time will come. I'm just waiting for the right time. It may be another couple of months before I tell him so I can at least help him this coming semester at school. No I don't like him that way since he's straight, I'm gay, he's just not my type (personality or body/face wise), I'm just not his type (personality or body/face wise), he thinks of me as his friend and I think of him as a friend.


    sorry I didnt mean to say you might be liking your friend. i was just saying i understand how it feels when your best friend is a homophobe.
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    Dec 13, 2010 6:08 AM GMT
    Good feeling isn't it ;-)
    And now, you will be able to feel less stress while being supporting for her, she know you really like her, with no hidden agenda.
  • kew1

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    Dec 13, 2010 10:18 AM GMT
    navi_leinad saidLucky, I have this straight guy friend who I've been thinking of coming out to. The bad thing is that I'm not sure how close we are, so I think if I tell him too soon he would push me away and well he's like becoming a very good friend to me. Bad thing is he doesn't like gay people so I'm damned if I don't (since he wants to head to a strip club for his bday) and damned if I do since well I'm pretty sure that it would cut me out of his life or at least I'm worried I might be. Anyways that;s good to hear you made a step towards coming out to friends/family. Next step another friend haha


    Go to the strip club if you want to, it won't kill you. I've been to a table dancing club with a couple of str8 friends (brothers), the only odd moments were when one of the dancers turned out to be an old school friend of the younger one & she'd be sitting naked at our table between dances talking about mutual friends (& the teacher who came in & watched her).
    I am out to them.
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    Dec 13, 2010 12:48 PM GMT
    I have about three close friends whom I cam out to as being bi.

    One was my best friend and the other two are my female best friend. One I actually dated.

    They are all pretty supportive about it and if funny that my guy best friends wants me to date guys rather than gals..Honestly he probably thinks I'm an unfair competition! icon_lol.gif

    Anycase , happy to see that you've managed to come gain a supporting friend but mind you she might pine for you from time to time.
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    Dec 14, 2010 3:08 AM GMT
    Congrats! I have this girl friend I came out almost two months ago, she is very supportive, you can never really tell how someone is going to take the news, there have being several times I wanted to come out to high school friends and then, they just made some comment that has stopped me from
    doing so.

    Congrats! Now you can bitch about men to her lol