has anyone out there actually overcome their depression?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 13, 2010 5:05 PM GMT
    i am just so desperately depressed and hopeless right now, i want to know if anyone has ever recovered from depression. i don't think i will. i've had it since i was 14 and it's only gotten worse. therapy has been so useless that i'm not even bothering with it anymore. the meds have been damaging and i'm never going on another one. i've completely lost interest in drawing and my friends, i just don't want to talk to any of them anymore. i dont want to hurt my parents but i cant see living my life just so they won't be saddened when i'm gone.
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    Dec 13, 2010 5:55 PM GMT
    Friend, It is NOT hopeless. Take my word for it. Depression is very temporary and can be dealt with and cured by yourself. The mind is EXTREMELY powerful! I say this to you as I have been cured myself, many years ago. I went through years of grueling depression where I was unable to function until one day I got ANGRY. Angry with this depression. I pulled myself up and I vowed to beat it. I absolutely refused to go another day like that. You won't believe it but it worked! This is what I did... I turned from someone who was always worried about others to one who is responsible for my own happiness and well being. I took control of my own happiness. That means absolutely taking control and making sure thatyou make YOU the best that YOU can be; to show others around you how confident and happy you are as a human being. Believe me, it shines around you like a light and is euphoric. It draws people to you and in turn, you are a happier person. Get mad at the depression, turn it into something positive. YOU are the person responsible for YOU! No one else and YOU can make this happen. Stop allowing the depression to control you. Control it, get angry at it and do not allow it to take you over. You are better, stronger and smarter than that. Please... life is more precious than you can see right now. Make you truly happy and love yourself-then, you will see! I promise. Please let me know how I can help. Would love to talk to you and explain how I beat it. I did and I have never and will never suffer from it again! Be in touch, friend! Tony tonync1969@aol.com
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    Dec 14, 2010 5:16 AM GMT
    I only stayed alive because I didnt want my loved ones to be sad for me...

    And well, I actually did get better, Im serious... I dont know how, but I did...

    I think the first thing that made the difference was quitting alcohol... and before that, actually talking about it.. the talking didnt make things better... but it showed me I wasnt alone...

    After i quit alcohol I got better gradually... then I started writing songs about it. and I got even better.... My friends who supported me were a great help too, once I started talking about it, I found out they were mch less judgemental of me than I was of myself.... That kind of evened my sadness out and made me more neutral, getting other perspectives on my situation and comparing mine to others

    i went to my shrink this weekend and she told me she thought I was fine now... that I looked and sounded ok, so I can now safely say Im not depressed... not as happy and cheerful as I was before, or would like to be, but not depressed


    I cant say Im happy yet, I dont fully have the zest for life back that I had before... but I'm not unhappy anymore...I may not be as motivated to get on with the day as I was before, but at least Im not bored and feel useless being alive anymore

    In addition, as much as I feel things are moving forward slowly Im actually having things in my future to look forward to, instead of constantly dreading a certain bleak outcome...


    I think they were right, it does get better
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 14, 2010 5:20 AM GMT
    BE STRONG.

    Im in the same situation as you are; I just punched a few at my bedroom wall right now, angry at my predicament in my life.
    But, I know this hardship wont last.
    I WILL. SO WILL YOU.

    BE STRONG.
  • Little_Spoon

    Posts: 1562

    Dec 14, 2010 5:25 AM GMT
    The show must go on.
    icon_biggrin.gif

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    Dec 14, 2010 5:26 AM GMT
    Tonync1969 said YOU are the person responsible for YOU! No one else and YOU can make this happen. Stop allowing the depression to control you.


    Hmm, that did not work for me though, when somebody tried to do that and make me focus on myself, I got even more depressed at my inability to get better myself icon_razz.gif
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    Dec 14, 2010 5:29 AM GMT
    Hey buddy,

    First of all, I know it's impossible to believe right now, but you CAN overcome it. I battled very deep and personal depression for a long while and eventually I overcame it. Most of the time I feel pretty good, some days are cruddy but that's just life.. Overall though, I'm much better..

    I agree with where Tony's going about getting angry at the depression, a matter of being assertive and standing up for yourself - it's hard to do when all you want to do is crawl into a hole and be forgotten. But for me, that same process was key to overcoming depression. I went about it kind of like this.

    I believe that all people have the right to do what they need to do to be happy and fulfilled in their lives, and that happiness is a state of being where humans can be the best that they can be for themselves and others.. So, since I'm a person, I'm entitled to this same right to be happy and fulfilled, no different than anyone else.

    That thing in my head that always got me down, that badgered me, that ripped me down became my enemy in a very literal sense. I started training myself to see those thoughts as foreign to who I really was. I thought, "I want to be happy and fulfilled, why on earth am I doing this to myself? This thing in my head is not the real me, it's not who I want to be, I am going to put an end to it. I am divorcing those thoughts from my being."

    It was at that point when I made my depression my enemy, when I stood up for myself, that I began to love myself, just as I could love another person. I began to see that those thoughts didn't have to control me, and I got better.. little by little..

    The particulars and intricacies of that process will be your own, and you will figure it out.. but you can, you will get better.. Big hugs buddy, we're all here for you.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 14, 2010 5:29 AM GMT
    Eat 2 handfuls of Cashews every day. I URGE you to PLEASE try it out. This has cured so many people. The niacin in it is amazing.
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    Dec 14, 2010 5:33 AM GMT
    I have to concurr with the other guys here. Looking back at my life now, I was depressed from a very young age and no one ever did anything about it. Before I decided to fight it on my own, which was only a few years back, I was very close to ending it all.

    What I remember was the feeling of drowning, and just getting up in the morning was a challenge every day. Then one day life gave me a swift kick in the ass.

    It wasn't easy getting to where I am know. But damn, is life ever good.

    You have to find the right person to chat with, same thing with the meds.
    I fought my shrink a long time before I went on my meds. After 3 years, it's time for me to come off of them. They've done their job and I want to feel again. Bad and good.
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    Dec 15, 2010 7:04 PM GMT
    mkubwa saidi am just so desperately depressed and hopeless right now, i want to know if anyone has ever recovered from depression. i don't think i will. i've had it since i was 14 and it's only gotten worse. therapy has been so useless that i'm not even bothering with it anymore. the meds have been damaging and i'm never going on another one. i've completely lost interest in drawing and my friends, i just don't want to talk to any of them anymore. i dont want to hurt my parents but i cant see living my life just so they won't be saddened when i'm gone.


    Regular exercise will help.
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    Dec 31, 2010 1:05 AM GMT
    Some things you can do:

    Talk to someone else. Find a psychiatrist, a therapist, or a support group. Something face to face.

    Exercise.

    Sunlight.

    Diet. Fish, nuts/seeds, veggies.

    Get outside yourself. Volunteer. Adopt a pet.

    Find something you like(d) doing and do it. At first it might seem like a farce and you're going through the motions, but at some point you'll enjoy doing it again.
  • Moishendlishu...

    Posts: 435

    Dec 31, 2010 1:14 AM GMT
    I still struggle with it sometimes, but that's due to outside influences...it's no longer just...I'm depressed for no reason thing.

    What worked for me...I dumped the meds and hit the gym. I can't tell you how or why but I've been working out for going on 5 years now and I have not needed a med since. So that's my recommendation.

    I will give you some advice that most people won't. YOU are NOT in control of it. Sorry, you aren't. Depression is a state of mind you have no control over. What you do have control over, is knowing your triggers, being conscious of them and taking responsibility for them. If you need sunshine to be happier, move to a place with sun (when you can afford it) If drinking or drugs makes you really sad the next day....stop drinking and doing drugs. If being alone depresses you, find community outlets to be social.

    These are not the easiest things to do, some people will think you are boring, or a party pooper or too rigid, or whatever, but fuck em....what matters is what keeps YOU healthy.

    I speak from personal experience. I've been through some shit in my life and over the past few years and there were times man...there were times. But I took responsibility for my triggers, realized when things were out of my hands, and am back in a pretty good place despite a lot of shit right now.

    It does get better man...but YOU have to NEED it to get better and put in the work to do so.
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    Dec 31, 2010 1:22 AM GMT
    Im saddened to hear you talk that way. I've never been in your shoes, so I don't know what its like to be in a deep depression. But your such a beautiful young man. And life is such a wonderful gift. I hope you get help for your depression. I really hope you get well soon. Can't imagine not wanting to experience all that life has to offer- so many joys and wonders out there. Take care of yourself.
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    Dec 31, 2010 1:34 AM GMT
    ECT can be very helpful in patients who do not respond to medications and therapy. it may or may not help you but it should be discussed as a useful adjuvant therapy in patients who have tried 'everything else'. if your pyschiatrist won't discuss it with you, find one who will. it is no longer the barbaric treatment immortalized in 'one flew over the cuckoo's nest' due to the pre-treatment sedatives and lower voltages used today. give it some thought... it may successfully relieve your suicidal ideation.

    http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/electroconvulsive-therapy/MY00129
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    Dec 31, 2010 1:35 AM GMT
    Yes, I've overcome it. Several times! I've been to the point where suicide seems the best solution and to the point where I can't believe I even THOUGHT about suicide. Lots of good advice here. Exercise and good nutrition is vital and something you can do. Sunshine isn't in your control unless you do what I did and move to Miami Beach. Time is really key. In time, the feelings will lessen and, also in time, you'll see how cyclical life is. When things get really shitty, I remember when they were shitty before and how wonderful things were after that. With age comes that perspective. It helps you enjoy the good times more because you know you will eventually go through bad times and it helps you get through the bad times because you know times will eventually get good again. What's help me get through the suicidal thoughts is thinking about how my suicide would devastate people I love and would never want to hurt and also thinking about all the people out there in my future who are going to need my help and I need to be there for them. I know that sounds very "It's a Wonderful Life" but it genuinely helps. Hang in there and if you ever need to talk to someone who understands, email me. Much love!
  • Syphon

    Posts: 366

    Dec 31, 2010 1:42 AM GMT
    I was severely depressed for a period of years, but I got over it. I'm still not a ray of fucking sunshine, but I can get out of bed in the morning and find joy in my life instead of finding it completely meaningless.

    I had to deal with the cause of my depression, and I also had to take steps to improve myself, mentally and physically. It's not an easy road, but now here I am over a year later and I can say that I'm not depressed anymore. I feel down sometimes, sure, but I always push the negative circle thinking and apathy away.
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    Dec 31, 2010 1:43 AM GMT
    Do whatever you have to do to stay alive.... please.
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    Dec 31, 2010 1:54 AM GMT
    I got treatment, and I got better. I never knew life was this enjoyable.
  • barriehomeboy

    Posts: 2475

    Dec 31, 2010 2:03 AM GMT
    Get a dog, or a fish, that won't survive unless you do. Then your life will have a purpose, and all the other stuff will work itself out.

    I didn't make that up. It's one of the tales in the James Herriot series of books about a real-life vetrinarian in Wales or wherever back in the last century, and a suicidal guy he brought a dog to. It sounds silly but his trilogy, or quadrilogy, was a huge hit during the last save-the-planet movement during the second last recession, back in the 80's. If you're stressed out by life, check it out. Taking that kind of temporary vacation in your brain, by reading, can really bring things back to normal when you close the book and go to sleep at night.

    Str8 men have kids to give them a sense of purpose and a reason to be vigilant and alive. Us gay boys are left floating in self-loathing and wondering what our purpose is.

    I've been suicidal since I was 14. The only reason I'm still alive is that I am curious. I want to see what happens next!

    We will prevail. Our lives are dominated by the sine wave. It's a scientist thing, but it means that things go up and down.

    I was there for the down of the 70's, then for the up in the 80's when all the videos had gay themes. Remember Franky Goes to Hollywood? Then the down of AIDS. No more Franky on MTV. Then the up of gay marriage in the best places to live in the world, like much of Europe, and your neighbor Canada. Hello, move!

    It's time for you to mount the next wave of your sine wave, and leave that depression shit behind. We are what we eat, and we feel what we think. Like, dude, it really is a monster of your own creation. That dark hole that eats you up is a product of your own mind, and you can control it.

    I've been there. I've crawled out of the hole. You have to take control of it, just as you would an unruly pet cat. Take charge.



  • tokugawa

    Posts: 945

    Jan 01, 2011 8:28 AM GMT
    mkubwa saidi am just so desperately depressed and hopeless right now, i want to know if anyone has ever recovered from depression.

    Yes, people have recovered from depression.

    mkubwa saidtherapy has been so useless that i'm not even bothering with it anymore.

    Many people have been helped by therapy. If you don't bother with it anymore, then it is impossible for you to be helped by therapy. Give it a chance. It can help ease the pain, and sometimes it can cure the pain.

    One alternative to therapy is to be miserable for the rest of your life.

    It sound like your depression will not go away by itself and you may not be putting enough effort into your own wellness; if you do not like your therapist, change therapists!

    mkubwa saidthe meds have been damaging and i'm never going on another one.

    How many meds did you try? One? Two? For some people, the first antidepressant works, but not everybody. For some people, the third different meds work, for some people, the tenth different meds work. Wouldn't it be a bummer if you give up on meds when the very next one would be the one that works?

    If you are never going on another med, then it is impossible for you to be helped by meds. A majority of people are helped by meds. Minor side effects, such as dry mouth or excessive sweating, are common. Major side effects, such as a manic episode, are rare; see your doctor immediately if this happens.

    mkubwa saidi've completely lost interest in drawing ...

    ... didn't you ever lose interest before, and then pick it up again?

    mkubwa said ... and my friends, i just don't want to talk to any of them anymore.

    If you don't talk to your friends anymore, then it is impossible for you to be helped by your friends.

    mkubwa said ... i dont want to hurt my parents but i cant see living my life just so they won't be saddened when i'm gone.

    Try living your life for yourself. Set goals like:

    1. Socializing with your friends (you might have a good time,)
    2. Spending some time each day drawing (you might notice improvement,)
    3. Stop being immobilized by your depression (if you can't do it yourself, seek professional help, use trial and error in order to find the right meds for you.)
    4. During the winter, make an extra effort to get some sunshine, if possible,
    5. Try to exercise as often as possible,
    6. If you feel things you have tried in the past don't work, try different things, like meditation, massage, acupuncture, sky diving, or something you always wanted to do but just never got around to it. Ballet, trapeze, acting, wrestling, volunteer work; the more things you do, the less time you'll have being depressed.

    If you ever think that you may physically hurt yourself, check into a hospital immediately. It may save your life, and nobody else needs to know about it.
  • Celticmusl

    Posts: 4330

    Jan 01, 2011 8:50 AM GMT
    I guess I'm kinda concerned that someone with clinical depression and not a complete vegetable doesn't know all the facts and the success rate of numerous drugs and therapies.
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    Jan 01, 2011 9:04 AM GMT
    Mine ended up turning into a jaded and detached cynicism masked by a veil of intellectualism and aesthetics. I did adamantly refuse to be medicated for it, however. I suppose I derive some sort of triumph from that.
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    Jan 01, 2011 9:57 PM GMT
    I've got all my life to live, I've got all my love to give. I will survive.
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    Jan 01, 2011 10:28 PM GMT
    There is a light at the end of the tunnel that isn't a train coming to run over you. Taking a heart medication with depression side effects sent me spiraling after realizing that I would never be able to compete again. Going to a therapist turned into a joke, even though he was a good one. Putting more foreign chemicals [pharmaceuticals] in the body than absolutely necessary made depression meds non-negotiable. I finally found a doctor who would listen and work with me on regulating the medication to what my body is capable of handling and not what "clinical studies" indicate as the best methods for management. I'm swimming again and have accepted that competition will never happen again.

    Exercise will assist in raising blood endorphin and serotonin levels. Having a regimen that kicks these natural chemicals into gear will make a dent in the depression. It sounds like you may be dealing with clinical imbalances. Definitely find a doctor and/or clinical psychologist who will work with you. Good luck!
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    Jan 01, 2011 10:30 PM GMT
    dude since i was a kid i was on every medication you could think of. i had social workers, therapists, psychiatrists. i had serious drug problems. fuckin dumb ass criminal bullshit goin on. in very dark places. for me it was sort of like..ok if it keeps goin on like this i either kill myself or get better. i dont know why or how...i mean going to a long term inpatient program helped..but i chose life or whatever corny thing you wanna say.
    its sad to say but for most people it has to get worse before it gets better. in the end like all that worked for me was not wanting to go back to those dark places. those feelings still come..i still wanna get high or hurt myself. sometimes i act out in shitty ways..but i keep the shit thats important to me up front.
    i work out every day. i set short term and long term goals. find reasons to live. remain GREATFUL for everything i have. i talk to god even though i dont have any kinda religion. i think about my dead friends. i think about how much fuckin wicked fun shit they are missing out on cuz they gave up.
    its like yeah depression and all that stuff - you dont choose to have it but you are the one who makes a choice to get better. yeah ill always be a junky and a sick fuck but i dont act on those things and i invite wellness and good shit into my life. if i fall back into bad habits its noones fault but my own.