Should I be Offended?

  • highbrow004

    Posts: 20

    Dec 14, 2010 2:18 AM GMT
    The guy I've been seeing still calls me "dude" or "man", after 6 or 7 dates now.
    Example: "Hey dude, have you seen..."
    To me, those terms show... comradeship... and not so much a romantic interest. I don't want to confront him because I don't want to scare him off, but I do like the time we spend together, and obviously want to be more than just a friend. What's your guys' take?
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    Dec 14, 2010 2:27 AM GMT
    I'll take "dude" over "babe" or "honey" any day.
  • LJay

    Posts: 11612

    Dec 14, 2010 3:10 AM GMT
    OP, why don't you just ask your friend to call you whatever you prefer. Next time he calls you dude, just say "Call me .... Dude seems impersonal."

    No need to overthink it.
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    Dec 14, 2010 3:12 AM GMT
    Tell him the same thing you mentioned here or simply bring it up in conversation and ask him what he likes and tell him what you like.
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    Dec 14, 2010 3:14 AM GMT
    Nah don't be offended. Maybe that is his way to hold onto every shred of masculinity he has. Who knows?

    But I WOULD rather be called babe or baby by a guy I am dating (but probably not in the beginning cause that could be awkward if we went on one dinner date).
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    Dec 14, 2010 3:16 AM GMT
    don't be high maintenance OR ask him to call you by your name to avoid the problem.
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    Dec 14, 2010 3:19 AM GMT


    maybe its just the way he talks....
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    Dec 14, 2010 4:58 AM GMT
    It doesnt mean anything, I call everybody dude, mate, babe, and love... none of them imply, or deny romantic interest.... I show romantic interest in other ways
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    Dec 14, 2010 5:03 AM GMT
    Don't be a stupid pussy. Tell him what you want him to call you. End of fucking story.

    (I make my man call me "sir", but that's just me.)
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    Dec 14, 2010 5:06 AM GMT
    What do you call him?
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    Dec 14, 2010 5:14 AM GMT
    I was just talking to someone about this today, but in a different context. People start using "dude" and "man" during confrontation these days. It's like all the sudden they forget your name and depersonalize you to "dude" or "man". I'd rather someone take a step up to my calling me Mr.____. At least that implies that we can have some indifference, but at least there is respect being acknowledged.

    I reserve "dude" for situations like this, "hey dude, I don't have a dollar you can borrow", and "man" for "hey man, can I bum a light off you".
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    Dec 14, 2010 5:19 AM GMT
    I went out on a couple of dates with a guy that constantly called me "buddy". It made me feel like he thought of us as FBs. Didn't last.
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    Dec 14, 2010 1:14 PM GMT
    A rose by any other name still smells as sweet.

    If he's into you, then he's into you, I don't think by him calling you dude means that he doesn't have a romantic interest. For lots of people its very common colloquialism still and there's no intention to offend, he might just be very comfortable with you.

    Either way, if it bothers you a lot you can always just bring it up as part of a general conversation, but I really don't think it's that big of a deal.
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    Dec 14, 2010 1:39 PM GMT
    Pyrotech saidI'll take "dude" over "babe" or "honey" any day.


    Agreed. I call my BF dude.
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    Dec 14, 2010 1:43 PM GMT
    For me personaly i wopuld love to be called honey babe baby and that sweet stuff a dude i call guys here and my friends so of course i would want to be diferent from then.You truy talking with him icon_biggrin.gif
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Dec 14, 2010 1:58 PM GMT
    I probably wouldn't be thrilled either, to be honest. I think if he keeps it up, I'd eventually call him on it, but if everything else is going well (and that's all that really bothers you), I'd pass on saying anything at this point.

    I think if you are getting "hey dude" on your 6 month anniversary, I'd have a conversation about it.
  • hockeyguy99

    Posts: 126

    Dec 14, 2010 2:01 PM GMT
    highbrow004 saidThe guy I've been seeing still calls me "dude" or "man", after 6 or 7 dates now.
    Example: "Hey dude, have you seen..."
    To me, those terms show... comradeship... and not so much a romantic interest. I don't want to confront him because I don't want to scare him off, but I do like the time we spend together, and obviously want to be more than just a friend. What's your guys' take?



    not at all... unless you want to make it a big deal. not everyone is into the 'pet' names like babe and all that.