"Saying Sorry"

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 18, 2010 12:37 AM GMT
    "Love means never having to say you're sorry"

    I was thinking about this today... and I concluded there's two sides to it... if you love someone, they don't really need to be sorry for the things they do wrong... but if I do something wrong, I will still say it, just because I think I should... usually I then find out it wasn't really needed, but still I feel it's necessary to at least FEEL sorrry

    conversely, if someone I love does something to annoy me, I will generally just ignore them... when they say sorry, Ill say, "forget it, I dont mind lol"

    unless they are crossing lines, then I'll kick their ass then and there lol.. figurateively of course, Im speaking of all people you love, including say children....

    What do you think of apologising, or being sorry.. do you find it important in your relationships? (Partner, family, friend, colleague, anyone)
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    Dec 18, 2010 12:40 AM GMT
    essential. the quote you gave came from 'Love Story' at a time when quirky little sayings were in vogue. Conversely, love means recognizing when you have wronged someone, making amends and apologizing...this concept is foreign to far too many people today...........................keithicon_cool.gif
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    Dec 18, 2010 1:05 AM GMT
    omg I remember that movie.

    "What do you think of apologising, or being sorry.. do you find it important in your relationships? (Partner, family, friend, colleague, anyone)"

    Absolutely.

    -Doug
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    Dec 18, 2010 1:40 AM GMT


    As my ex girlfriend told me, "Even though you say sorry, its still out there."

    Sometimes it means something and sometimes it doesn't to the other person and vice versa.
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    Dec 18, 2010 4:24 AM GMT
    many times there is 3 sides to it, his hers, then the truth, and this would not exclude gay couples either. Sorry only belongs if you have done wrong by accident. If you plan to seek revenge on someone you can not latter say sorry, as it was no accident.

    Also people some people of today expect leaders, to say sorry for past wrong deeds done, even if that person in power was not even alive at the time, and thats just absolutly ridiculous, as how can they say sorry for dead people, as well take the guilt for it.
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    Dec 18, 2010 4:29 AM GMT
    100% necessary.
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    Dec 18, 2010 4:34 AM GMT
    I think it's necessary, but I'm the kind of person who will only apologize if I mean it and not to get someone off my back. Plus, i've learned that some people think that saying i'm sorry will make their mistake go away. So not cool
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    Dec 18, 2010 5:22 AM GMT
    I think saying sorry is supposed to show that you care.
    Doesn't mean you ask expecting or asking to be forgiven, just mean, you care and regret.

    When you are in love, what's really important is to work together at finding why you ended up in a situation leading you have to have to say... sorry.

    So that you never have to say sorry again.... for the same reason.
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    Dec 18, 2010 5:48 AM GMT
    It i necessary when you did something wrong .... but saying sorry it's only real when you mean it .... not just because.
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    Dec 18, 2010 11:07 AM GMT
    art_mariobros saidIt i necessary when you did something wrong .... but saying sorry it's only real when you mean it .... not just because.


    yeah that is right.
  • Pygmalion

    Posts: 131

    Dec 18, 2010 11:31 AM GMT
    I think so that "saying sorry" is absolutely necessary in certain relationships.
    But, then it depends upon individual to individual and the kind of relationship you maintain with everyone.
    Formally, we do apologize - but it very rarely means something...because not everyone in this Earth means something to us.
    While the table turns around when you talk about the people you love. In that scenario, either people find it hard to apologize or they don't. But in any of the case, when we do apologize to the people we love, we mostly mean it from our heart...and that is what the true sense of saying sorry or apologizing is.
    Although, I believe that every "sorry" has its different meaning.
    Sometimes, we apologize to our loved ones because we feel guilty of something terrible...Sometimes, we apologize because we want to get off the hook. While, sometimes we apologize because for us the relationships matters more than our ego and then our sorry means that " the fault was not mine, it was yours..but since I love you - so lets forget everything and start all over..."
    But yes, sometimes..sometimes...when the fault is so big and words become insufficient to describe the guilt. Then our mouth shuts itself and let our eyes to do the task. Sometimes -- we apologize from our eyes and not from our mouth - when we pour our heart out to them! And that I think is the purest form of "Apology" =)
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    Dec 18, 2010 2:09 PM GMT
    amar_m said"Love means never having to say you're sorry"


    Yeah, you don't have to say it (for the little things), but for those big doozies, you most definitely should if you wanna last.
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    Dec 21, 2010 10:47 AM GMT
    I think an apology is essential to healthy relationships. Love means that you acknowledge how you hurt your partner and in turn try to resolve that and make an effort not to do it again. The final step of an apology is often the most overlooked. Without that promise to not repeat the same offense, an apology is empty. After several of those, an apology means nothing and your ability of reconciliation goes down the drain.


    Three components of effective apologies

    Regret for having caused damage or hurt to another. A genuine expression of regret shows that you empathize with the person you hurt. That's the key element - showing them that you truly know how they feel.

    Responsibility for your actions - whatever you did that caused the personal damage. This is best delivered in a specific way, such as "I'm sorry I was late getting home with the canap◊ôs. I know I caused you a lot of inconvenience and embarrassment for the party."

    Remedy to make up for the damage done. Sometimes this involves restitution ("I have made arrangements to repair the fender quickly, and I'll cover the costs of a rental car while it's being repaired.") and sometimes the apology makes a credible promise of remedial behavior in the future ("I have signed up for a series of classes on anger-management.")