So why do they do it? Lie about their age or profile.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 22, 2008 9:16 AM GMT
    I mean, I look at the profile and think "No WAY" - or even worse you arrange to meet up in person... Why do guys lie about their age?

    I know gay is a little youth centric - ok a whole lot youth centric - but if you are into the hook up thing, or dating, surely you would think the secret is going to be out eventually.

    I'm curious what younger and older guys think? Should you state your real age? Or is that being unrealistic?
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    Mar 22, 2008 9:31 AM GMT
    I always think honesty is key policy, so when the person later reveals his real age, I am taken back a bit and wonder why he didn't just say it in the first place, for to me, it seems like a very silly thing to lie about. From that, I fear I begin to distrust the guy, wondering what else said wasn't true.


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    Mar 22, 2008 10:42 AM GMT
    ChrisN saidI mean, I look at the profile and think "No WAY" - or even worse you arrange to meet up in person... Why do guys lie about their age?

    I know gay is a little youth centric - ok a whole lot youth centric - but if you are into the hook up thing, or dating, surely you would think the secret is going to be out eventually.

    I'm curious what younger and older guys think? Should you state your real age? Or is that being unrealistic?



    Coming from a 25 year old posing as a 43 year old, don't you think that's a little hypocritical. I remember having just this conversation at my fiftieth birthday party...
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    Mar 22, 2008 11:13 AM GMT
    Probably because some men use search engines which go 18-35 or 18-40 thus eliminating anyone over 40.

    Looking at your profile I notice that more than half your "Hot" list are under 40. Go figure.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 22, 2008 12:08 PM GMT
    I am 51. I do not care who knows it, because every one of those years gave me experiences I will remember forever. Plus I look great for 51. icon_smile.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 22, 2008 12:13 PM GMT
    Honesty is always the best policy. After all, it is only a number. I think seasoned fit men are way sexy. icon_biggrin.gif
  • GQjock

    Posts: 11649

    Mar 22, 2008 12:45 PM GMT
    I get a kick out of it too...

    I understand the desire to do it...
    the web is kinda anonymous and it's a little wishful thinking

    ...but if you're kinda thinking on the outside chance that you'll meet someone
    ... and they're likely to say "Dude...are those AARP checks coming in for you yet?"
    It won't be fun
  • Timbales

    Posts: 13993

    Mar 22, 2008 1:14 PM GMT
    I have no need to lie about anything in my profile.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 22, 2008 1:21 PM GMT
    Mental age probably? icon_smile.gif
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Mar 22, 2008 1:22 PM GMT
    I do think that clarity and honesty is important in a profile. What is there to gain in anything else?

    People can look differently than what you expect. In both a positive or negative way, so flexibility is important, but dishonesty doesn't make much sense.

    I know someone who is 52, but claims he's 38 on another
    gay site. Why? He even has a partner and is online for hookup purposes. Red flag?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 22, 2008 2:35 PM GMT
    I think maybe it's an act desperation on their part to get laid or whatever other purpose their on website, so maybe we're left with being critical of the people we put on our hot list; that is if some people don't want older people in their hot lists.

    For example, I know from my experience on gay.com what a person over 50 usually looks like. So when it comes down to adding someone because of their physique alone I can tell what to look for, though it's not my main concern as I do have a few men over 40 in my hot list who actually scorchingly hot!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 22, 2008 2:44 PM GMT
    Maybe this can explain the reason guys lie about
    their age, well as far as chatting goes. Sad but
    true. I'm 38 and all those little lines and wrinkles
    on my face, dammit if I haven't earned each and
    every one icon_biggrin.gif


    The Rules of Chat....

    So way back when, circa 1997, when I discovered the joy's of gay chatting, one could just hop online and strike up a conversation with anyone and normally learn a few things and get a few good laughs. Nowadays though, it seems that EVERYONE has some rules about chatting IE: No Pvt's if your <25 or CHAT ONLY (that's why there's a pic of your c*ck, hmmm) or Have pic in Profile or NO CHAT (ok, I can see that) or Maybe away (may be away?!?! wtf are you here for then) or I'm 25, no one over 30, not looking for a daddy (ummm you need to go back to school cuz if your 25 no one in their 30's could be your daddy)



    Now I'm the kinda chatter that WILL chat with anyone, so long as your not talking about my job and how you think cops are hot or how you want me to tie you up or handcuff you and do cavity searches! For real, people actually tell me this shit! Bleh!!!! So anywho, if I did have Rules of Chat, not that I do, these would be mine:



    1) No Pvt's <19, because you don't know jack!

    2) No Pvt's w/o Pic, because you could be some undercover schmo trying to pretend to be an older person when in reality your a 40-something person trying to get me in trouble

    3) No Pvt's <25 but >19 because, your in that fantasy state when you will tell me all about what you want a cop to do to you and how much you think cops are hot

    4) No Pvt's >25 but <30 because your in some so called, LTR (Long Term Relationship) yet you think it's ok to wanna hook up online

    5) No Pvt's >31 but <35 because your most likely just out of an LTR and wanna slam all men telling how they suck and how they aren't trustworthy and all the horrible things they've done to you.

    6) Pvt's Ok for >36 but <38 because you may be like me, still single, no LTR for a while and might have a good outlook on life!

    7) No Pvt's >39 but <50 because chances are you have the word (BOI) in your profile and your a circuit queen whose trying to re-live their youth and keep up with the 20-somethings.

    icon_cool.gif No Pvt's >51 but <65 because, well just because,,,,it't my chat rules dammit!

    9) No Pvt's >66 but <70 because you've just retired and your looking for some boi to travel with you....freaking PERV!!!!!!!!

    10) No Pvt's >71 but <80 because you may stroke out while chatting, die and leave me hanging in cyber space with no one to chat with and wondering what happened to you!

    11) No Pvt's <81 but <100 because, well, could you still carrying on a chat at that age??????



    Happy Chatting!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 22, 2008 3:23 PM GMT
    I don't really see this any differently then what I see in the rest of society. People have been lying about their age for years. How many women will actually tell you how old they are and how many people believe that it's taboo to ask? Losing your youth is tough, especially in this community where looks and youthfulness seem to be very important. Really, all of society uses youth to catch attention, look at the Sunday ads, not many 50 or 60 year olds in those ads and if there are, they look 30! I think we all fear rejection of hitting a specific number (whether 30, 40, 50 or whatever) and that's an insecurity we all must work through. I know I did, and now I'm 50 and hey, I'm me. But it took me a while to accept who I am. And on the Internet where you can be whatever you want...buyer beware!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 22, 2008 3:41 PM GMT
    If you're going to lie about your age on a profile, what else are you going to lie about? I went on a date with a guy I met online who claimed to be 35. He also claimed to be athletic. He was really in his 50s and was "athletic looking" due to liposuction. I am not one to discriminate on age but that is a rather big stretch. I didn't have any further contact with him because he lied to me.

    I purposely post my age on gay.com to be 100+. It filters out most of the people who start chats with "you lookin?"

    If someone asks me my age in person, I usually say something to the effect of "you won't believe me, so just guess." Whatever they guess, I compliment it as a really good guess. Everything on my profile here is true.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 22, 2008 4:00 PM GMT
    Ok, I wont lie anymore.. Im 57.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 22, 2008 4:00 PM GMT
    I'm not 25 anymore - or 35 or even 45! but you won't see me lying about it. Much better to look and feel great for the age you are. I started preparing for my old age when I was 28 (I see you counting out there - that's right over 20 years ago!!). Like we all know - if you eat right and work out - use moisturizer liberally - watch your sun time (I blow that one all the time though) and if you just make up your mind to be happy, appreciate what you have, you'll never, ever lack for hot, male company!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 22, 2008 4:34 PM GMT
    fitguymike saidII purposely post my age on gay.com to be 100+. It filters out most of the people who start chats with "you lookin?"


    Hah. While Officer Max (hello Mike) overstates his age to filter out too many responses (which, if you look at his pictures, you can understand), I overstate my age to make sure that anyone who sends me a RJ email really wants to talk to me, or, even if there is interest in something beyond that, that it is based upon some attraction to the pictures I've posted (which are all recent).

    I never lie about my age to anyone who actually tries to connect with me at a personal level, and guys find that out about me right away.

    Besides, at my stated age, I will ALWAYS look younger than my years. icon_twisted.gif

    John
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 22, 2008 4:55 PM GMT
    I dont need to lie about my age yet, and when i do.... im hoping for either a really good surgen, or a good mortitian
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 22, 2008 5:02 PM GMT
    Eh, lies are too complicated.
    I did once see a review of a software package that was supposed to help keep track of your on-line lies. You click on the name of an on-line contact and the appropriate profile of who you are pretending to be for that person pops up.
    For some people, it's all a big RPG.
  • CuriousJockAZ

    Posts: 19119

    Mar 22, 2008 5:11 PM GMT
    I can understand the lying sometimes to a point because many young guys think that you're one step in the grave if you're over 40...which just isn't the case as many of us well know...taking liberty with a few years may be one thing, but taking liberty with a decade or two is quite another.

    That being said, when someone tells me their age online, I usually ask "Is that in REAL tears, or AOL years?" LOL!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 22, 2008 5:29 PM GMT
    Is this a joke? You really don't know why men lie about their age?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 22, 2008 5:31 PM GMT
    obscenewish saidIs this a joke? You really don't know why men lie about their age?



    why?icon_confused.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 22, 2008 5:36 PM GMT
    I think it's simple: anyone who lies about themselves online, age or otherwise, usually has no intention of meeting people in real life, so they invent a persona that they think will attract the most attention.

    So if you want to talk to a fake persona, you engage them. If not, you don't.

    (Or, if you're like me, report em as fakes cause they're using a picture that happens to be one of the 7 billion you've lustily downloaded over the last 22 years and you have a photographic memory for "hot guy pix").

    K
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 22, 2008 5:41 PM GMT
    my boyfriend back home had lots of his pics posted online, and i did not like that, but i did not let it bother me.....

    two years later, now, i see many profiles with his pictures on it, all fake profiles....french, itialian, russian, american..u name it! and so i report them, because it bothers me....so i dont like fake profiles
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 22, 2008 5:50 PM GMT
    I have no neew to hide the truth about who I am online. Why bother lol, specially since it took me till I was 27 to accept myself. What I want to change, I will change, through sweat, pain, and tears. Besides if I were gonna lie about myself I would want something more conviencing then "future budda" lol.