Everybody is superficial and honesty is the best policy. So what do you love the most about a man's physique? What just puts you off? 2: do you work out for yourself, your sport/profession, your boyfriend or for the rat race?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 16, 2007 5:09 PM GMT
    I love : really defined V-lines, they are just amazing.

    Dislike: Hmm Ok straying from the topic slightly but overly waxed eyebrows, strategy waxes to avoid the uni brow, they're cool.

    2: I work out for myself and my bf. His last few bf's were ripped and i really feel the pressure, ok ok i know im a cooler guy than them (:D) even so, you get me?!
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    Jun 16, 2007 5:46 PM GMT
    I'm all about a nice back...nice shoulders, lats, etc. Ah... ;-)

    I dislike waxed eyebrows as well. In fact, I dislike the whole plucked, polished, and botoxed look. Of course, that could just be my lingering LA hang-over talking...

    As for working out, I do it for myself, always have, always will. I'm not much of a gym guy anymore. My workouts now are outside, hiking, snowshoeing, skiing, etc. When I lived in LA, I definitely felt more "pressure" to hit the gym, etc., but I never really *enjoyed* the experience. I didn't hate it either, just never got very excited about it. Back then I worked out more to impress others, fit in, attract a man, etc. Now I do it just for me.
  • gymingit

    Posts: 156

    Jun 16, 2007 7:06 PM GMT
    If I'm correct, I haven't been in this long enough to know, I really like the V-line myself. You don't have to be cut either... just the shape which carries like the treasure trail... TURNS ME ON COMPLETELY. Sends shivers down my spine to even think about them.

    I do work out for myself. I have my plan and goals set before me. My profile reflects just that.

  • GQjock

    Posts: 11648

    Jun 16, 2007 7:21 PM GMT
    Can't help it - but I'm a sucker for a nice 6 pk

    Really not a fan of steroided out guys

    and Lastly in it for myself...and the figgin' rat race if that's what we're now callin' it :)
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    Jun 16, 2007 7:45 PM GMT
    I love those little dimples on the small of the back.

    'roided up guys put me off.... that and CHICKEN LEGS! I'm not Col. Saunders. They do nothing for me. :)

    I work out for my sport. I had to hire a trainer and develop workouts that "evened out" my body. If you row sweep )one oar to a person) then one half of your upper body and one leg will get noticeably stronger then the other if you don't do something to correct. She was pretty freaked out because my right leg was a LOT stronger then my left. :)
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    Jun 16, 2007 9:38 PM GMT
    I'm a leg man and gotta say a nice set of quads (combined with the abovethewaist stuff) will definately get me between your legs for hours! An ass with the diples is nice too! LOL!

    Again, have to say I dislike sticks propping up a warehouse.

    I'd like to say I workout for myself but that would be slightly disingenous as I do enjoy the looks and frankly, the confidence that comes when you know you've got something to work with. Of course, the visual is a bit secondary to just feeling in tune with my body, the confidence thing, and the sense of balance that comes with eating well, exercise, and progressive thinking.
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    Jun 16, 2007 11:22 PM GMT
    To be honest, a man's face is his best part. Then in descending order, chest, bum, arms, legs.

    I don't like plucked eyebrows or make up on a man.
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    Jun 16, 2007 11:22 PM GMT
    I work out for me. I want to be the best I can be. It's totally selfish.
  • atxclimber

    Posts: 480

    Jun 17, 2007 12:35 AM GMT
    I work out for several reasons:

    1.) I love all the sports I do.
    2.) I used to be fat, and don't ever want to be again. I feel so much better when I'm in shape.
    3.) I want to get my body fat down to 8% just to prove to myself that I have the self-discipline to do it.
    4.) I've always had a poor body image and the better shape I get in, the more I can walk around at Pride events in, whatever, a Speedo and not worry about ruining anyone's day.

    #4 is not terribly healthy, because I don't think it's helping overcome my body-image issues, it's just making me vain-but-still-somewhat-insecure. I'm hoping the security will just kind of follow soon behind. As long as I don't make it all contingent upon approval from others I figure I'm OK.

    Plus, #1, 2, and 3 are healthy, I think. In particular, I find dieting to be a really good exercise in withdrawal of the senses (pratyahara!) in that it makes me so acutely aware of how often I go to eat food not because I am hungry but because I crave sense-pleasure or distraction.
  • dfrourke

    Posts: 1062

    Jun 17, 2007 12:45 AM GMT
    Gosh...this is the longest question ever...

    1. I am a "legs" guy...secondarily to an "ass" man...I look at those two things first...then I see the face attached.

    2. Frankly, I have a "foot" thing. If you have great feet...I am all about looking at them...if you don't...I can't get past it...

    3. My reasons for working out have changed over the years:
    - In my teens I worked out for approval from my dad [read: Therapy needed]
    - In my 20's I worked out for the amazing body and attention that came with it. [read: just started therapy]
    - In my 30's I work out to fit into my clothes, enjoy great food, release work stress, support my track and field goals, and keep myself healthy. [I'll let you read whatever you want into this answer]

    - David
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 17, 2007 12:54 AM GMT
    Hey Atxclimber:

    Loads of people are in the same boat you are. My ex was just like that... come to think of it, both of 'em were.

    I began to deliberately shun the gym in favour of sports because I found too many of the people there weren't really healthy. Many of them had great bodies, but not-so-great minds and hearts. I didn't like being around that kind of energy. I wanted to boost my self esteem, but not from having a flawless body. I wanted to gain self esteem from achievement.

    That's why I took up competitive rowing. I had to get up at 5 AM, bike 10K to the rowing course, practice for about 2 hours, bike home, clean up and bike to work.

    The end result for me was not a flawless body, but I was one of the fastest guys in the club. I'm not as tall as most rowers so I had to overcome their genetic advantage. That meant working harder and wanting it more.

    To me, the "Sticks holding up a warehouse" body comes from that kind of vain, and kind of insecure mentality. I think that's why chicken legs put me of, but an "average" guy with muscular legs leaves me weak.

    I'm not a big fan of withdrawal of the senses. For one thing, I'm WAY too talented at cooking. For another, I'm a man of large appetites. God, I miss the Clinton years. :)

    I prefer to indulge in everything.... work hard, exercise hard, enjoy good food and the occasional beer. I think a balanced life is a healthy life. Take care of the body, but pay equal attention to the mind and the heart. It'll show up in your face, your body and the energy you put out.

    To me, that's the key to being an attractive person. If you're health in all aspects people will be attracted to you naturally.
  • atxclimber

    Posts: 480

    Jun 17, 2007 1:17 AM GMT
    Scull: Yeah, I agree about the sports. For me it's also a matter of motivation. I won't go to gyms because I really do not enjoy lifting weights. I love cycling; I love a scenic road ride more than just about anything. In San Francisco I'd ride up to Fairfax and then up Mt. Tamalpais, up 10 miles of mountain switchbacks, and then emerge on what is, apparently, the most photographed stretch of road in the United States, the ridge. Every time I came out of the woods and up on the ridge I would begin to weep -- half, I think, out of the near-delirium of how hard that ride was for me, but half because it was the most beautiful landscape I'd ever seen. A friend of mine photographed it a bunch:

    Looking north over the woods
    Looking south over the bay
    Looking east, over Tiburon

    Why anyone would rather be doing leg presses on a machine in a gym somewhere than witnessing that glory was beyond me, every time I crested the ridge.

    Of course, I also usually felt on the verge of vomiting from the effort. Tradeoffs!

    I imagine rowing, gives you some of the same scenery, or just that exposure to nature.

    When I'm not being lazy and just hanging out in the climbing gym, I'll sometimes get the gear out and climb outside, and in Texas, it's more about scrabbling down into a valley and climbing out of it, so you don't get long vistas, but the rock itself and the river valleys around here are beautiful.

    And in every case, anytime I interact with anyone else doing the same sport, it's clear there's a passion and a love. Getting high-fives from strangers when I'd huff and puff my way over the top of Mt. Tamalpais (as they huffed and puffed, too) is inspiring. Or hearing cheers when I send that tough bouldering problem I've been working on for the last month at the climbing gym. I love the camaraderie.

    I'm not worried about the vanity (although I have to admit I have many mirrors :) ) because I think it'll just work its way out over time, and it's not worth really being anxious about. I try not to identify with it, which I think is key.

    As for sensory withdrawal, it's getting a little tangential here, but the benefit I've found from it is that it helps to soften the reliance on the sensation. Doesn't mean I can't enjoy it, still. In fact, usually I find it enhances the enjoyment.

    Like an alcoholic who says he can quit any time, I find that with most sensory pleasures I indulge in are really miniature addictions. It's easy for me to say, I don't need that ice cream. Or, I don't need to watch action movies. But when I put my money where my mouth is and abstain, it turns up all these anxieties and cravings that I can then work through. Since a lot of that stuff is about distraction and avoiding being present, once I start to make headway with it, I can then return to a good meal (say, make a quick trip up to the French Laundry... mmmmm...) and suddenly it's all more vivid and enjoyable because I'm able to enjoy it in a more sincere way; I'm really eating just for the food's sake.

    So I wouldn't want to be doing that, abstaining, dieting all the time, but I find abstinence is useful, for stretches.
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    Jun 17, 2007 2:34 AM GMT
    Hey Climber:

    WOW! I thought Vancouver had the most beautiful scenery in North America. I stand corrected! Rowing and running in Vancouver are awesome. When you're rowing you have to dodge herons, seagulls, the harbour seals (who are playful but who can capsize a boat without thinking twice), along with pleasure craft and amphibious airplanes. It's a lot of fun :)

    And yeah, I know the joys of almost vomiting. Actually I knew a guy who was trying out for the national rowing team. You have to achieve a certain score on the erg (rowing machine). If you've seen one, you know they have a large fan which is what provides resistance.

    He got to the last 20 meters in his test, then he just heaved his guts out.... directly into the fan, which of course spattered the spew everywhere, instantly. Trust me, that saying about crap hitting the fan is NOT something you ever want to witness! :)

    I find rather then withdrawal, I like to try substitution. I'm a chump for ice cream myself, but instead of indulging I'll make myself a HUGE salad, with mixed greens, tomatoes, cucumber, strawberries, bosc pear, shallots and fresh basil. I find for myself the trick is to get as much pleasure from the salad as I would from the ice cream. I suppose I'm a hopeless hedonist. :)

    What about the rest of you guys? How many people here are into outdoor sports?
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    Jun 17, 2007 5:53 AM GMT
    1) Yay for Really good arms, including the FOREARMS people!
    Yuck for Guys who have stick calves

    2) Workout partially to keep a sense of self-discipline in my chaotic life; as a scientist i have to work on long projects, the rhythm of working out provides a sense of order that helps with this... also great stress reliever..... need more upper body strength to ride without a harness on the kite for longer.
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    Jun 17, 2007 7:27 AM GMT
    -I'm a sucker for the Neck, chest and good set of arms...don't need to be a bodybuilder but i love a man with size, (not talking about dick size)

    -What puts me off is feminin guys, bitchy ones too regardless if it's a twink or a bodybuilder.
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    Jun 17, 2007 9:29 AM GMT
    Actually, in response to a few guys above I was getting really bored at the gym towards the end of uni, I can totally understand the commitment to sports....more social/variety.

    Also, a lot of guys are into legs, which is shit for me, there's nothing i find more dull than leg exercises, just can;t be arsed. Which is not the best attitude but i just lose concentration in seconds!

    Actually is anyone a member of a GAY gym? I'm curious as to what kind of atmosphere is such a place...bitchy? Ultra competitive? Sleazy?

  • bigguysf

    Posts: 329

    Jun 17, 2007 8:13 PM GMT
    I LOVE a guy with a discernible waistline! LOL Actually, all kidding aside I love a nice tight waist. The best proportions are when a guy's chest and lats are bigger than his waist.
    So you might guess that the biggest turnoff for me is a gut. It doesn't matter to me how much you work out for a muscular build if you have a huge belly.
    Yeah, some friends of mine have called me a body fascist. :) But I hold myself to the same standard. Which leads to the "who I work out for" answer... myself. NO matter what age I am I want to feel as physically viable as possible, so I can play tennis, hike, do whatever I want physically and not feel like my lack of physical conditioning is a hindrance.
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    Jun 18, 2007 1:27 AM GMT
    I love nice pecs, biceps, buns. I dislike "chicken legs".

    I work for myself.
  • Drewboo

    Posts: 28

    Jun 18, 2007 2:16 AM GMT
    My first forum post:

    I will have to say that I work out for the rat race. I actually enjoy working out, but I really dont have the time, so I make myself do it... for the rat race! Also, maybe for a hott man to notice me as well, but doesnt seem to be working. And of course to be a good role model to all the gay guys on campus with no self-image or belief that gayness can mean something good - that gay guys can be strong, sexy, and compassionate to one another - all at the same time.


    I like big, juicy (jello-ey) pecs. They dont look right without some nice guns, and a flat stomach is the icing. I know I just stated the three vanity-muscles, but come on - they are the top three for a reason. I also like a man with really nice calves!!!!! Those V things are really hott, and an juicy ass is a must. Ok, the closet door has opened... Im superficial.


    FUPA - Fatty Upper Pubic Area
    (for women its the Fatty Upper Pussy Area)
    I have a little bit so I can criticize it!! Ghetto booties, although some of the cutest guys have them, I cannot handle them!! They can be slightly ghetto, but not real ghetto
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 18, 2007 4:02 AM GMT
    Don't people's reasons for working out morph? As I explained on another thread, I was thrown in a gym at age 5. Then it was tumbling and gymnastics, a little later swimming,tennis and wrestling.

    Being in the gym environment, I started lifting ridiculously early -- before I was producing testosterone. My incredibly strange mother, who had more plastic surgery than the typical Elvis impersonator, fueled this with constant criticism of my appearance in part.

    I modeled (and hated every minute of it) from about age 17-20. Everything I (and my mother) hated about my body, like my ridiculously long legs, was exactly what the agency liked. All the focus on my body and appearance at home and the agency made me detest the way I looked. I made myself as unattractive as possible much of the time -- while working out compulsively. I was split.

    During my marriage, I worked out very little. Then, when I came out at 26, I went back to the gym for purely vain reasons. But, being neurotic as hell, I almost immediately noticed the positive effect on my mood. I think that has motivated me more than anything in the 87 years since. Also: Since I make a good bit of my living from eating for review, I also regard it as necessary to avoid humongousness.

    I have been really burned out in the gym and just took the last two weeks off -- "strategic deconditioning," HST calls it -- so I will be back at it tomorrow.

    Me like: After the face, I notice the butt. Sad, but true. Generally, I prefer men who look edgy, not pretty or even conventionally handsome. Dark. Disturbed, perhaps. Poets. In the right mood, there is nothing like fucking an ugly man. See Cocteau's version of "Beauty and the Beast" for corroborative evidence of this before gasping in horror. Belle, la bete c'est moi.

    Me not like: Pretty bois unless they look like an otherworldly androgyne. A&F looks taste like white bread, although a demonic type disguised, slightly ineffectively, as an angel is always good.

    I feel better now that I got all that out.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 18, 2007 4:43 AM GMT
    OW where would you like us to send the bill?
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    Jun 22, 2007 7:21 PM GMT
    the bust... everything about the chest, shoulders and arms! its hot. Guys with too muscle, too much product, too much hair (in all the wrong places) too much sun and bad teeth. men should be natural. i workout to live a healthy life. being diagnosed with diabetes when i was 17 has played a major role in the lifestyle i lead. btw, not everyone is superficial, some of us find the beauty in all things. dont lump us all together bro.
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    Jun 22, 2007 7:33 PM GMT
    When it contradicts his mind, as weird as that sounds.
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    Jun 22, 2007 7:33 PM GMT
    There is nothing hotter than a little hair on the small of a man's back. I'm TOTALLY and ass man, and I love butt-cleavage.

    Dirty or crooked teeth TOTALLY put me off. Snaggle-tooths are NOT something I like to kiss.

    No matter what though, They can be HOT as all hell, but it's all about intelligence for me. If they're arrogant, forget it. They'll never be hot in my book. Same goes if you're stupid (i.e. I had to explain to someone why there were Jews in Latin America, read a book).

    Personally, I work out by myself. I also work out for myself. I have a horrible body image, and I used to be chunky. I don't like working out with others because I find it a distraction. I also don't do gyms because of the pressure to look good, the cruisyness of the gyms in Boston, and the ones that are not cruisy are rat holes. So ya, by myself.
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    Jul 16, 2007 5:35 AM GMT
    I love the "V line", I never knew the phrase for it until this post. How does one get those muscles to look like that, anyhow? I realize you gotta be lean, but even then, some people seem to have that shape, some don't. Some guys you can actually see the tendon connecting the obliques to the pelvis, very hot. And nice ab veins are a good touch.

    Also, love legs, nice big quads and calves, and am a sucker for big defined pecs, and of course, defined abs.

    Then, there is the face...I also like well defined serrates, lats, arms, vascular forearms, and pretty feet. Did I miss anything?