humble and nice, cant it be a bad thing?

  • crush09

    Posts: 117

    Feb 06, 2011 9:15 AM GMT
    when i talk to people or chatt or what not, i tend to be nice and show them courtesy and show how nice or good of a person i can be, but lately thats been back firing on me... they say that i led them on, im sorry but i just talk in a very polite and humble manner at first, i dont want to offend people.....

    so being nice or sauve, leads to a misleading attraction? yes or no?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 06, 2011 10:05 AM GMT
    Fuck dat!!

    Humble and nice can go screw someone elses arse

    icon_smile.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 06, 2011 11:18 AM GMT
    I was nice and I got trampled on.

    Fuck nice.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 06, 2011 11:28 AM GMT
    crush09 saidwhen i talk to people or chatt or what not, i tend to be nice and show them courtesy and show how nice or good of a person i can be, but lately thats been back firing on me...


    Online is for hooking up and dating. That is the overwhelming mentality and if you are nice they assume you want to hook up or date. Being nice and humble is for reality. Save it for real people. The online world should not matter.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 06, 2011 11:30 AM GMT
    Ariodante saidI was nice and I got trampled on.

    Fuck nice.


    Agreed 100%.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 06, 2011 1:31 PM GMT
    crush09, you're not leading them on, they're jumping to conclusions and making assumptions, likely because you stand out like a floodlight against the 'it's-cool-to-be-an-asshole-no-one-online-is-real' mentality.

    The trouble with the hyphenated attitude above is that it ALSO means those taking that attitude are telling everyone else that they themselves should not be considered real or worthy of anyone's time online.

    If humble and nice is you, then be it. You should NOT attempt to be something you aren't.

    -Doug
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 06, 2011 1:32 PM GMT
    Ariodante saidI was nice and I got trampled on.

    Fuck nice.


    I'd like to get wicked with Ari.icon_twisted.gif
  • trevchaser

    Posts: 237

    Feb 06, 2011 1:50 PM GMT
    meninlove saidIf humble and nice is you, then be it. You should NOT attempt to be something you aren't.


    I agree! It's really a turn off to be around someone who you can feel right away isn't genuine. If you're a really good actor and can play the 'badass' part to the bone and then truly enjoy becoming that type of person in the long term then get on it! But if you are truly nice and humble...so be it. Don't let other's dictate what your passion is and and what your passion should be. If you do that you ultimately end up being trampled on the rest of your life. If they don't like you then, NEXT!!

    Be strong in who you are and walk it. Life is about the people you meet, and the things you create with them. Don't let people create you. So go out and start creating! icon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 06, 2011 3:49 PM GMT
    It can be mistaken for attraction, or it can be taken advantage of by someone else. It's happened to me either way, and I usually have to be honest up-front either way about it, saying that I'm a nice guy in general, and then tell them how you feel about the situation.

    Regardless, you shouldn't change that about yourself, because it's very hard nowadays to find nice guys that are easy to talk to.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 06, 2011 4:00 PM GMT
    crush09 saidwhen i talk to people or chatt or what not, i tend to be nice and show them courtesy and show how nice or good of a person i can be, but lately thats been back firing on me... they say that i led them on, im sorry but i just talk in a very polite and humble manner at first, i dont want to offend people.....

    so being nice or sauve, leads to a misleading attraction? yes or no?

    Be real, don't pretend you're anything that you are not. If you are not a nice and humble person, impersonating one online is leading people on.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 06, 2011 4:35 PM GMT
    crush09 saidwhen i talk to people or chatt or what not, i tend to be nice and show them courtesy and show how nice or good of a person i can be, but lately thats been back firing on me... they say that i led them on, im sorry but i just talk in a very polite and humble manner at first, i dont want to offend people.....

    I know. I am the same way.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 06, 2011 4:49 PM GMT
    JAKEBENSON said
    Ariodante saidI was nice and I got trampled on.

    Fuck nice.


    Agreed 100%.


    I'm nice icon_cry.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 06, 2011 4:52 PM GMT
    bhp91126 said
    crush09 saidwhen i talk to people or chatt or what not, i tend to be nice and show them courtesy and show how nice or good of a person i can be, but lately thats been back firing on me... they say that i led them on, im sorry but i just talk in a very polite and humble manner at first, i dont want to offend people.....

    so being nice or sauve, leads to a misleading attraction? yes or no?

    Be real, don't pretend you're anything that you are not. If you are not a nice and humble person, impersonating one online is leading people on.


    This is a good post... as long as you are sincere and honest about what kind of person you are, then what other guys perceive you to be is their problem.
    It IS true, however, that some people take "courtesy" as a come-on..and get the idea that you WANT them. Just be you....
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 06, 2011 4:55 PM GMT
    Ariodante saidI was nice and I let myself get trampled on.



    Fix't. It's entirely possible to be nice and not be a doormat. icon_cool.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 06, 2011 5:00 PM GMT
    jeffy87 said
    Ariodante saidI was nice and I let myself get trampled on.

    Fix't. It's entirely possible to be nice and not be a doormat. icon_cool.gif


    What is this burning need that you have to take other peoples' words and "fix" them to suit YOUR way of saying something?
    Your point, however, is noted...it's called "setting boundaries"
  • CuriousJockAZ

    Posts: 19129

    Feb 06, 2011 5:04 PM GMT
    I don't think there is anything wrong with being "humble & nice" --- as long as it is genuine. Just be yourself.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 06, 2011 5:15 PM GMT
    Be who you are-- if that's humble and nice, believe me, there are many of us who will appreciate it.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 06, 2011 5:16 PM GMT
    Be who you are ....
    Being humble , courteous and nice shows how well mannered you are ..
    If they want to interprete it any other ways , it is their loss .
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 06, 2011 5:28 PM GMT
    Yeah; totally sucks being beautiful and nice...send all sorts of wrong messages.
    Makes you wonder why some say hot guys are stuck up assholes...Hmmmm?

    Dear Diary: Heather told me she teaches people "real life." She said, real life sucks losers dry. You want to fuck with the eagles, you have to learn to fly. I said, so, you teach people how to spread their wings and fly? She said, yes. I said, you're beautiful.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 06, 2011 7:18 PM GMT
    StudlyScrewRite said
    Ariodante saidI was nice and I got trampled on.

    Fuck nice.


    I'd like to get wicked with Ari.icon_twisted.gif




    I get to be Elphaba
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 06, 2011 7:22 PM GMT
    to all the people who say things like "fuck being nice" -- you are what is wrong with the gay community. and the human community.

    just be friendly and nice, state your intentions clearly. don't get offended if people aren't interested in you. have reasonable standards and expectations.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 06, 2011 7:43 PM GMT
    It is a great thing that you are humble and nice. If a guy in whom you are not "interested" starts coming on to you, I imagine you will be able to let him know in a humble and nice way that you are not interested in him. icon_smile.gif If he then gets upset, that's his problem!
  • chris_dallas

    Posts: 340

    Feb 06, 2011 7:44 PM GMT
    haha thius is so true i find the same thing happening to me then i feel bad but really i didnt freaking do anything! ahah
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 06, 2011 7:45 PM GMT
    the world has to many cynics, i know cause i am a schizo-cynic, - but my first option can and should always be....polite and kind until it hurts...Keithicon_wink.gif
  • chicagoguy79

    Posts: 8

    Feb 06, 2011 7:47 PM GMT
    I am always nice and polite and LOVE guys that are the same. Life is way too short to have an attitude. If guys think I am a flirt than thats okay. I am.