He says " You are my friend..."

  • Thegabriel

    Posts: 29

    Feb 21, 2011 3:48 PM GMT
    I found a man of my life ,we talk and stay together for 5 days ...after that we still be close, with afection. But he says that he feel me as friend, not as boyfriend, i love him and i don´t want lose him ... what can i do ?
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    Feb 21, 2011 4:01 PM GMT
    Aside from locking him in a cage, there isn't much you can do but be his friend.
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    Feb 21, 2011 4:12 PM GMT
    "Commitment" scares alot of guys...and there is little you can do to change that. Be the same consistent friend you have been and don't pressure him to "fall in love"....Besides LOVE doesn't happen in 5 days, but lust and friendship can....don't confuse them. icon_cool.gif


    "If you love it set it free, if it returns it was always yours, if it doesn't return, hunt it down and kill it! LOL!!! ...(NO NOT REALLY!)
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    Feb 21, 2011 4:14 PM GMT
    unfounded7 saidAside from locking him in a cage, there isn't much you can do but be his friend.
    I choose option one. icon_twisted.gif
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    Feb 21, 2011 4:18 PM GMT
    Thegabriel saidI found a man of my life ,we talk and stay together for 5 days ...after that we still be close, with afection. But he says that he feel me as friend, not as boyfriend, i love him and i don´t want lose him ... what can i do ?


    He's made it clear. He wants to be friends, not boyfriends, not lovers.

    Either accept what he has to offer, or move on.

    I have met several men in my life, and I thought each one was the "man of my life". Unfortunately, they also had boyfriends who were my friends. I accepted the fact that I could have a friendship with these men and be grateful for that. I could have a friendship with my friend AND his boyfriend. That's a blessing that should not be discounted.

    It's not an all or nothing. It can be an "AND" not an "OR".

    FYI, get in the habit of feeling joy because somebody you care about is feeling joy and you'll never feel jealous or envious.
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    Feb 21, 2011 5:02 PM GMT
    You have to accept it and move forward. Some guys are better friends than lovers. It is, of course, preferable to have a lover and a friend in one person, but he's a rare commodity.
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    Feb 21, 2011 5:21 PM GMT
    Either just stay his friend or move on. A combination of a lover and friend is best, but it's so rare these days.
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    Feb 21, 2011 5:26 PM GMT
    Get a small transmitter and offer it to him as a "friendship bracelet" or a piercing. Then you'll be able to track his movements with the tag.


    Tell him you love him. He made it clear that he wants to be friends, but you did not say that you told him that you love him.
    If, after he knows how you feel, he still only wants to be friends, then be his friend if you want him in your life.

    A warning: You say that you don't want to lose him. The surest way to drive someone away, is to do everything you can to keep him around.
    You can be a good friend. You cannot force someone to stay in your life.
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Feb 21, 2011 5:28 PM GMT
    Accept him as a friend and cherish the time you had. Being a "friend" isn't a consulation prize.. it can mean much, just understand he is drawing a line and may not view you romantically from this point forward.
  • Chackers

    Posts: 149

    Feb 21, 2011 5:35 PM GMT
    paulflexes said
    unfounded7 saidAside from locking him in a cage, there isn't much you can do but be his friend.
    I choose option one. icon_twisted.gif


    ...that's kind of your 'thing' isn't it icon_smile.gif
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    Feb 21, 2011 5:39 PM GMT
    paulflexes said
    unfounded7 saidAside from locking him in a cage, there isn't much you can do but be his friend.
    I choose option one. icon_twisted.gif



    I agree... This...

    You can't force someone to like you, but at least you have his friendship... Keep that, and have no expectations and things will fall into place... But I can't see how you can fall in love in just 5 days...
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    Feb 21, 2011 5:39 PM GMT
    HndsmKansan saidAccept him as a friend and cherish the time you had. Being a "friend" isn't a consulation prize.. it can mean much, just understand he is drawing a line and may not view you romantically from this point forward.


    Good one, Chris (our MOTD)... I would only add that IF you cannot accept him as a friend, and give him plenty of space....you will lose him forever. I had to learn that the hard way...just within the last year.
    My situation was a bit different... he said some things to me that gave me reason to believe that there might be a future for us... including "I'm falling for you". He grew tired of me...and after a while and plenty of on again-off again tries, he totally blocked me out of his life.
    IF you can accept him as a friend, and put NO demands on him...you might make it work. But fair warning...anything more will end it forever... icon_sad.gif
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    Feb 21, 2011 11:21 PM GMT
    paulflexes said
    unfounded7 saidAside from locking him in a cage, there isn't much you can do but be his friend.
    I choose option one. icon_twisted.gif


    How many cages do you have in your basement anyway?
    And no one has seen mnboy for a while. icon_confused.gif
  • Thegabriel

    Posts: 29

    Feb 21, 2011 11:44 PM GMT
    Thank´s guys , i think the best i can do is wait and still be friend ... but we see one each other like 4 times per week and im now in the top of his best friends , he have 3 persons who he can trust all , me and another 2 guys ... well now i need patience and try to find someone else to forget him ...