Telling Roommates...

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 22, 2011 3:51 AM GMT
    I'm transferring Universities next semester and have the option to choose roommates through a "profile matcher" on their site and have found a few great guys that I've already found some sort of connection with. Thankfully all of them aren't religious so I don't think they would be too judging of my rainbowness but you never know.

    Do you think I should give each of them a little heads up before I pick them to see how they respond? I know it really isn't anyone's business, but I also don't want to make any of them uncomfortable.

    All of them discussed college girls with me on the phone, so I don't think they have a clue. icon_wink.gif
  • Bunjamon

    Posts: 3161

    Feb 22, 2011 3:53 AM GMT
    It's not a bad idea disclosing to them while they're still really just little blips in cyberspace. You should be a little more selfish here, though: instead of thinking of making them uncomfortable, think about how uncomfortable you would be if you ended up living with a homophobic dickwad. Do it for your own piece of mind and safety.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 22, 2011 8:49 AM GMT
    Yes, Bunjamon gave you the main reason why it would be important to tell your roommate.

    Let's say you bring a date back to your dorm. Nothing ruins the mood like having your psycho roommate swinging a bat at your date.
  • Chackers

    Posts: 149

    Feb 22, 2011 12:40 PM GMT
    Ermine saidYes, Bunjamon gave you the main reason why it would be important to tell your roommate.

    Let's say you bring a date back to your dorm. Nothing ruins the mood like having your psycho roommate swinging a bat at your date.


    Please tell me this is coming from personal experience lol?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 22, 2011 12:43 PM GMT
    Agreed w/ Bunjamon.

    Having a roommate who knows is a looooot easier. My roommate is my best straight friend (before anyone asks, NO he is not bisexual and NO we do not hook up) so I can have guys over whenever I please.
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Feb 22, 2011 1:27 PM GMT
    I think it needs to jive with your current (and future) lifestyle considerations.
    What I mean is, for those guys who aren't out or just making the first steps,
    not sure it would be the best course of action until they are ready. For you,
    I'd proceed, it sounds like you are more than comfortable with who you are and
    if you don't say something, it might present a problem later.... especially if you show up with a guy at your place. Need to know their views.

    Let us know what happens!
  • allatonce

    Posts: 904

    Feb 22, 2011 1:51 PM GMT
    Ya just come out beforehand if you don't want to live in the closet for the next year. You can be comfortable from day 1 instead of trying to come out 2 months in when it will be a lot more difficult.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 22, 2011 1:52 PM GMT
    UtahCapita saidAll of them discussed college girls with me on the phone, so I don't think they have a clue. icon_wink.gif
    Tell them you're hotter than the college girls, and suck better dick. icon_razz.gif
  • owen19832006

    Posts: 1035

    Feb 22, 2011 2:07 PM GMT
    paulflexes said
    UtahCapita saidAll of them discussed college girls with me on the phone, so I don't think they have a clue. icon_wink.gif
    Tell them you're hotter than the college girls, and suck better dick. icon_razz.gif


    LOL!!!! probably true!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 22, 2011 2:57 PM GMT
    I picked my roommate in law school without fist meeting him in person and neither of us discussed our sexual preferences before moving in together (the only commonality that we had was that we were both accomplished collegiate wrestlers). I was a certifiable bisexual at the time. The first couple of months he and I would walk around the house with just undies on especially in the mornings when we're rushing to go to class. One time, I thought he'd already left the house so I went to the kitchen butt naked. Well, he apparently was still home. The first word that came out of his mouth when he saw me butt naked was "wow!". I learned that day that he was also bisexual. You can pretty much tell what happened during the three years that we roomed together. Moral of the story: you don't need to tell your potential roommate everything about your sexual preference because it will ultimately come out--and when it does come out, address it then.
  • DCEric

    Posts: 3713

    Feb 22, 2011 2:59 PM GMT
    Bunjamon saidIt's not a bad idea disclosing to them while they're still really just little blips in cyberspace. You should be a little more selfish here, though: instead of thinking of making them uncomfortable, think about how uncomfortable you would be if you ended up living with a homophobic dickwad. Do it for your own piece of mind and safety.


    +1
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 22, 2011 7:01 PM GMT
    Chackers said
    Ermine saidYes, Bunjamon gave you the main reason why it would be important to tell your roommate.

    Let's say you bring a date back to your dorm. Nothing ruins the mood like having your psycho roommate swinging a bat at your date.


    Please tell me this is coming from personal experience lol?


    No, the two college roommates that I shared a room with were both socially awkward. If I brought anyone back, female or male, they'd be somewhat jealous.
    My school was also pretty liberal so the chance of finding a raging homophobe (or racist for that matter) was pretty much nil.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 22, 2011 7:10 PM GMT
    Yes, tell them.

    It's a good idea to have everything on the table before moving in with somebody, so they don't get any surprises later that could negatively effect both of you.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 22, 2011 7:14 PM GMT
    UtahCapita saidI'm transferring Universities next semester and have the option to choose roommates through a "profile matcher" on their site and have found a few great guys that I've already found some sort of connection with. Thankfully all of them aren't religious so I don't think they would be too judging of my rainbowness but you never know.

    Do you think I should give each of them a little heads up before I pick them to see how they respond? I know it really isn't anyone's business, but I also don't want to make any of them uncomfortable.

    All of them discussed college girls with me on the phone, so I don't think they have a clue. icon_wink.gif


    Why don't you get a private dorm?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 22, 2011 9:00 PM GMT
    paulflexes said
    UtahCapita saidAll of them discussed college girls with me on the phone, so I don't think they have a clue. icon_wink.gif
    Tell them you're hotter than the college girls, and suck better dick. icon_razz.gif


    I think that one goes without mention. icon_cool.gif

    amuletazawakh said
    Why don't you get a private dorm?


    I will be getting one (private room atleast), but you still share a tiny linked bathroom, and I'd rather keep him informed about it so it's not a shock or set him off.....and I'd prefer not having a bat find mine or his head unexpectedly.. icon_smile.gif






    And I would say I'm totally comfortable with myself, but I sure as hell don't go around blabbing my sexuality, so only close friends really know and ALL others assume I'm straight. Hopefully I can break a few stereotypes while I'm at it too..
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 22, 2011 9:04 PM GMT
    UtahCapita said
    I will be getting one (private room atleast), but you still share a tiny linked bathroom


    If you share a bathroom, he'll know you're gay.














    No, I don't mean because he'll see the lube, hair product, and skin products.

    I mean you bathe regularly and brush your teeth. What are you, a homo?icon_lol.gif
  • 10sboySF

    Posts: 32

    Feb 22, 2011 9:22 PM GMT
    UtahCapita saidI'm transferring Universities next semester and have the option to choose roommates through a "profile matcher" on their site and have found a few great guys that I've already found some sort of connection with. Thankfully all of them aren't religious so I don't think they would be too judging of my rainbowness but you never know.

    Do you think I should give each of them a little heads up before I pick them to see how they respond? I know it really isn't anyone's business, but I also don't want to make any of them uncomfortable.

    All of them discussed college girls with me on the phone, so I don't think they have a clue. icon_wink.gif


    Just think of yourself as the pussy bait. Be open about it and sell yourself discussing your features and benefits. Gay boys have lots of hot female friends that the straights love. This is just from my personal experience.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 22, 2011 9:33 PM GMT
    Ermine said
    UtahCapita said
    I will be getting one (private room atleast), but you still share a tiny linked bathroom


    If you share a bathroom, he'll know you're gay.














    No, I don't mean because he'll see the lube, hair product, and skin products.

    I mean you bathe regularly and brush your teeth. What are you, a homo?icon_lol.gif


    Fuck, I'm out of luck. I take 2 showers and have about 6 bottles in there....didn't know I was such a flamer.

    10sboySF said

    Just think of yourself as the pussy bait. Be open about it and sell yourself discussing your features and benefits. Gay boys have lots of hot female friends that the straights love. This is just from my personal experience.


    "Pussy bait", that's going in my lingo book, thanks. icon_wink.gif