Over-reaction??

  • ja89

    Posts: 789

    Feb 25, 2011 7:33 AM GMT
    http://www.parentdish.com/2011/02/24/bullying-parents/?icid=maing|aim|dl4|sec1_lnk3|46442

    So I logged on today and this caught my eye. I really think there are worse things a parent can do to their children. I have my own opinions towards parenting and handling the discipline for children, but i think that a lot of people would not agree with it. I was raised to pay for my actions whether good or bad. When I read this I shrugged and thought when does this get bad??? Parents are too cautious about raising their kids now. My mom was loving and stern all at the same time. When we got in trouble the punishments were creative and we knew to never even try to do something like it again. I think these kids will learn to listen to their parents the next time they say stop doing something.

    I would like your views on this guys. Parents and all. It's cool to hear others opinions. so fire away men.
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    Feb 25, 2011 7:35 AM GMT
    might be helpful brother to copy and paste the url, saves a lot of hassle.....Keithicon_wink.gif
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    Feb 25, 2011 10:20 PM GMT
    How bout a belt to their ass. Worked for me when I was a kid.
  • Aquanerd

    Posts: 845

    Feb 26, 2011 2:05 AM GMT
    catfish5 saidHow bout a belt to their ass. Worked for me when I was a kid.


    Worked for me too. Did you every get the "go sit on the stairs and think about what you did" before the belt came out?

    Years later, my mom said that she and my dad agreed never to touch us when they were angry, the time on the stairs wasn't get us, it was for them to get under control, so that "getting our attention" didn't turn into abuse.

    The hot sauce is assault, the standing on a street corner is a last ditch effort after lack of parenting early on, and the Ebay think is just childish on the mom's part.

    I can't help but think that a belief on the part of a child that their action, might result in a spanking might have worked at an earlier stage, but sadly the good attention getting swat on the backside now deemed inappropriate.
  • mizu5

    Posts: 2599

    Feb 26, 2011 2:06 AM GMT
    My parents neverrrr hit us.

    we had time outs, in our room, or the stairs. or a chair.]


    I enver minded,I could go read.
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    Feb 26, 2011 2:08 AM GMT
    catfish5 saidHow bout a belt to their ass. Worked for me when I was a kid.


    Concur!
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    Feb 26, 2011 2:11 AM GMT
    The whole parenting debate to me is like the food debate. What is right and what is wrong for you (as a child and as a food consumer) is continuing to gradually change as advances in science and more rigorous studies are revealing new and sometimes counter-intuitive information. Although I'm adamant about not physically hitting one's kids or damaging them in any way physically. I believe that it shoves them into a state of subservience, hostility, and long-lasting bitter resentment.
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    Feb 26, 2011 2:14 AM GMT
    my dad beat the shit outta me when I was a kid.......if I got bad grades....it was on. icon_neutral.gif
  • Aquanerd

    Posts: 845

    Feb 26, 2011 2:31 AM GMT
    JAKEBENSON saidThe whole parenting debate to me is like the food debate. What is right and what is wrong for you (as a child and as a food consumer) is continuing to gradually change as advances in science and more rigorous studies are revealing new and sometimes counter-intuitive information. Although I'm adamant about not physically hitting one's kids or damaging them in any way physically. I believe that it shoves them into a state of subservience, hostility, and long-lasting bitter resentment.


    I agree to a certain extent, parenting skills start with how one is raised, when you learn the modern techs that were unknown when you were growing up and adapt your techniques depending on how the child reacts.

    One thing I beg to differ, is the reference to "subservience, hostility, and long-lasting resentment." None of these apply to my relationship with my parents. I assume that is because spankings were rare, and always followed by discussion and hugs. Love and support was the foundation of my family.

    If you take away the love, and all you are exposed to is the physical, then yeah, I see your point. In this day and age it's a moot point. Even when a parent uses a creative none violent method, "standing on the street corner." the government will be brought in.

    Talking and teaching and positive reinforcement is always the best method for any relationship, however, there will always be kids that don't listen or learn through words.

    I'd rather a quick whack on the butt, then a thorough buttfucking from Bubba when the kid ends up in jail @ 18.icon_cool.gif
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    Feb 26, 2011 2:32 AM GMT
    Aquanerd said
    JAKEBENSON saidThe whole parenting debate to me is like the food debate. What is right and what is wrong for you (as a child and as a food consumer) is continuing to gradually change as advances in science and more rigorous studies are revealing new and sometimes counter-intuitive information. Although I'm adamant about not physically hitting one's kids or damaging them in any way physically. I believe that it shoves them into a state of subservience, hostility, and long-lasting bitter resentment.


    I agree to a certain extent, parenting skills start with how one is raised, when you learn the modern techs that were unknown when you were growing up and adapt your techniques depending on how the child reacts.

    One thing I beg to differ, is the reference to "subservience, hostility, and long-lasting resentment." None of these apply to my relationship with my parents. I assume that is because spankings were rare, and always followed by discussion and hugs. Love and support was the foundation of my family.

    If you take away the love, and all you are exposed to is the physical, then yeah, I see your point. In this day and age it's a moot point. Even when a parent uses a creative none violent method, "standing on the street corner." the government will be brought in.

    Talking and teaching and positive reinforcement is always the best method for any relationship, however, there will always be kids that don't listen or learn through words.

    I'd rather a quick whack on the butt, then a thorough buttfucking from Bubba when the kid ends up in jail @ 18.icon_cool.gif


    you know...........unless you're into that sort of thing........icon_rolleyes.gif
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    Feb 26, 2011 7:17 AM GMT
    My Dad was more of the lecturing parent and my Mom was more hands on. Nothing worse than getting ur as beat and then the 3hr lecture of how you FUCKED UP...... A day of exhaustion!
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    Feb 26, 2011 7:22 AM GMT
    Hillie saidMy Dad was more of the lecturing parent and my Mom was more hands on. Nothing worse than getting ur as beat and then the 3hr lecture of how you FUCKED UP...... A day of exhaustion!


    Too bad a lot of parents these days want to be their children's "best friends".....it doesn't work that way.......My Mom broke more than one wooden cooking spoon on my ass...... Dad was more of the psychological
    type....just a look was all it took....most of the time.......heheheh.....icon_eek.gif
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    Feb 26, 2011 6:48 PM GMT
    Until I was eight my mother actually used a riding crop, and since I assumed that this was a universal method of punishment the only trauma I suffered was becoming riding crop-averse. (Sorry guys.) After that she downgraded first to a belt, then a spoonful of tobasco sauce, then a slap on the face and finally grounding. Now I'm punished by long telephone conversations about what's new in Florida.
  • ja89

    Posts: 789

    Feb 28, 2011 8:56 AM GMT
    A lot of good points. I believe there is no one way to raise a child. I was raised on if you did something that was deemed bad you were punished (usually hit by a switch, belt, hand, or what ever she could get her hands on usually.) but then right after, we got the 10 min lecture on why it was bad and then hugged right after. My mom made sure to say 'I love you' at least 20 million times after just so I knew she did what she did to teach me a lesson. I wasn't a child who pushed the limits on what I could do before I got in real trouble.

    My 4 year old brother on the other hand does this now. He has the worst temper and really doesn't listen to anyone, he just goes about his day running his mom and my dad's lives. They have a way of raising them and I really don't agree with it because all I see is them allowing for my brothers to do whatever they feel like and if they get angry at them they go in the other room and let them keep on doing what they are doing without any consequences. When I went to visit at some point, the youngest brother kept hitting my computer and me. Gave him countless warnings and I told him the next time he felt like hitting me I would do what he did to me right back. Wouldn't you know 1 min later he came in and started hitting me again, I did what all older brothers do at some point to their younger ones, lets just say I almost got kicked out for smacking him on the hand twice.

    I had a good little argument with my dad about how he lets them run all over him. His reasoning is that he is too old for it and can't really keep up. I feel like if you're going to keep warning a child without any punishment, sooner or later they will catch on to what you're doing and run your life into the ground.

  • Feb 28, 2011 9:07 AM GMT
    ja89 saidA lot of good points. I believe there is no one way to raise a child. I was raised on if you did something that was deemed bad you were punished (usually hit by a switch, belt, hand, or what ever she could get her hands on usually.) but then right after, we got the 10 min lecture on why it was bad and then hugged right after. My mom made sure to say 'I love you' at least 20 million times after just so I knew she did what she did to teach me a lesson. I wasn't a child who pushed the limits on what I could do before I got in real trouble.

    My 4 year old brother on the other hand does this now. He has the worst temper and really doesn't listen to anyone, he just goes about his day running his mom and my dad's lives. They have a way of raising them and I really don't agree with it because all I see is them allowing for my brothers to do whatever they feel like and if they get angry at them they go in the other room and let them keep on doing what they are doing without any consequences. When I went to visit at some point, the youngest brother kept hitting my computer and me. Gave him countless warnings and I told him the next time he felt like hitting me I would do what he did to me right back. Wouldn't you know 1 min later he came in and started hitting me again, I did what all older brothers do at some point to their younger ones, lets just say I almost got kicked out for smacking him on the hand twice.

    I had a good little argument with my dad about how he lets them run all over him. His reasoning is that he is too old for it and can't really keep up. I feel like if you're going to keep warning a child without any punishment, sooner or later they will catch on to what you're doing and run your life into the ground.


    Wow, that's crazy...your little brother is running the show at your folks' house after they had raised you the 'old school' way? What made them change child-rearing philosophies? Did the PC cops scare them into laying off the traditional methods of discipline? I don't think it's cool to beat a kid or use soap, hot sauce, etc.--all of those methods could (and should) be considered abusive and grounds for a social worker to get all up in your business...but there has to be a system of checks and balances, consequences, etc. Kids are so disrespectful these days, have no etiquette whatsoever, and don't give a damn--all thanks to 20 years of the PC cops telling parents it's wrong to tell their kids 'no'. It's sad as hell...
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    Feb 28, 2011 9:07 AM GMT
    Oh I got whopped a lot when I was younger...Belts, slippers and what not....Now usually yelling and expletives which I tune out lol.....

    I don't think I could ever whack my kid but I will enforce stern discipline by taking away their cellphone and what not. icon_smile.gif
  • ja89

    Posts: 789

    Feb 28, 2011 9:36 AM GMT
    RealSportsJock said
    ja89 saidA lot of good points. I believe there is no one way to raise a child. I was raised on if you did something that was deemed bad you were punished (usually hit by a switch, belt, hand, or what ever she could get her hands on usually.) but then right after, we got the 10 min lecture on why it was bad and then hugged right after. My mom made sure to say 'I love you' at least 20 million times after just so I knew she did what she did to teach me a lesson. I wasn't a child who pushed the limits on what I could do before I got in real trouble.

    My 4 year old brother on the other hand does this now. He has the worst temper and really doesn't listen to anyone, he just goes about his day running his mom and my dad's lives. They have a way of raising them and I really don't agree with it because all I see is them allowing for my brothers to do whatever they feel like and if they get angry at them they go in the other room and let them keep on doing what they are doing without any consequences. When I went to visit at some point, the youngest brother kept hitting my computer and me. Gave him countless warnings and I told him the next time he felt like hitting me I would do what he did to me right back. Wouldn't you know 1 min later he came in and started hitting me again, I did what all older brothers do at some point to their younger ones, lets just say I almost got kicked out for smacking him on the hand twice.

    I had a good little argument with my dad about how he lets them run all over him. His reasoning is that he is too old for it and can't really keep up. I feel like if you're going to keep warning a child without any punishment, sooner or later they will catch on to what you're doing and run your life into the ground.


    Wow, that's crazy...your little brother is running the show at your folks' house after they had raised you the 'old school' way? What made them change child-rearing philosophies? Did the PC cops scare them into laying off the traditional methods of discipline? I don't think it's cool to beat a kid or use soap, hot sauce, etc.--all of those methods could (and should) be considered abusive and grounds for a social worker to get all up in your business...but there has to be a system of checks and balances, consequences, etc. Kids are so disrespectful these days, have no etiquette whatsoever, and don't give a damn--all thanks to 20 years of the PC cops telling parents it's wrong to tell their kids 'no'. It's sad as hell...


    I wasn't raised by them, we have different moms and my dad wasn't there when I was a child growing up. so it explains the difference in parenting. honestly I'm glad I was raised the way I was, I wouldn't make it as far as I have now.
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    Feb 28, 2011 10:45 AM GMT
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nn5jlrxcpkI