Affection And Your Gay Male Friends

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    Feb 27, 2011 3:06 AM GMT
    How affectionate are you guys with your gay male friends? And I mean actual, real friends; not friends with benefits and the like.

    With most, if not all of my friends, when seeing them or saying good-bye, I'll more often than not give them a hug and kiss on the cheek or lips; for some of my very close friends, we'll even say 'love you' as we are saying good-bye. And sometimes I'll even walk arm-in-arm with them if we are going out for the evening.

    I know that some gay men can be rather uncomfortable with these displays of friendship.
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    Feb 27, 2011 4:15 AM GMT
    Fantastic topic...

    Being "gay" is seriously like a light switch I worked hard in order to learn how to turn on and off because it is not fair to those who care for me to have to ALSO put up with my foreign desires.

    My friends of six years or more seem to share a good manly hug with me and if it becomes so strong that I sometimes shed tears for it I get even a bigger hug. MAN, my life has been so blessed with sincere friends both gay and straight.

    I had to first take control of a few things about myself that use to cause me to inflict my pain towards everyone around me... I was left by my Father to a Step Father that was sexually abusive. I was also raised mostly by women because the men in their lives could not be trusted.

    These are MY issues and nobody elses although many can relate to them. But that doesn't mean my friends can relate and I don't challenge their emotions when the real resentment is towards my Father and Step Father.

    Be advised as I am sure you already know... Forgiveness really opens the pathway to your heart healing. Good friends won't ever step on it, they just want to avoid giving the wrong impression. I'm sure you can relate to being exhausted by all the sex crazed people out there.

    I was taught by a very influential councilor that I opened up to twenty years ago who taught even the most hardcore prison men to hug like a man rather than a little girl. The stronger you can take responsibility for your emotions the more others will try to help.

    Oh and one more thing, I actually do have one good looking Italian straight best friend that even kisses (yes he is totally straight) and it literally baffles me everytime because I never felt what it is to love another guy as though you were related. I too am blessed.

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    Feb 27, 2011 4:16 AM GMT
    I'm very affectionate with my friends. I'm always giving hugs and kisses but I think that just comes from a latino upbringing. I do hold back the I love you though because sometimes that can be misunderstood for some of my peeps.icon_lol.gif
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    Feb 27, 2011 9:37 AM GMT

    Hugs and "I love you!"
    but only with my closest of friends.
    I absolutely don't mind being public about it either.

    Here's my friend Bobby and I gettin' a little cozy:
    http://a5.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc4/164370_10150365575440088_510605087_17003754_2787824_n.jpg
    Andre and I snugglin' for a pic:
    http://a8.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc6/166340_10150370706050088_510605087_17092668_1165650_n.jpg
    My besties Heather and Ashley (excuse my awful hair):
    http://a1.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-ash2/59092_1315948513871_1685467719_647705_5222054_n.jpg
    and my kitty for good measure~
    http://a5.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc6/183463_10150390647425088_510605087_17399307_6526296_n.jpg

    I treat all my friends equally, I even tell my straight roommate/bestfriend that I love him sometimes, not as much though because he has that guy thing to maintain. icon_razz.gif
    I also give both of my parents a hug and "I love you" when I'm saying goodbye to them. I spent too long not letting them know how much I appreciate them, so I like to do it for myself too.
  • DarkSensation

    Posts: 715

    Feb 27, 2011 9:38 AM GMT


    I suck their Dicks as a way of Saying Hello icon_lol.gif
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    Feb 27, 2011 9:40 AM GMT
    DarkSensation saidI suck their Dicks as a way of Saying Hello icon_lol.gif
    2po441j.jpg
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 27, 2011 1:04 PM GMT
    DarkSensation said

    I suck their Dicks as a way of Saying Hello icon_lol.gif
    Oh, hello there! icon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 27, 2011 1:55 PM GMT
    For close friends, greetings are usually a hug and a kiss on the lips. I like being physically affectionate, even when there isn't anything sexual about it. I think touch is something most of us crave and it feels good so why not?
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    Feb 27, 2011 2:01 PM GMT
    I have very few gay friends but I typically hug them when we say goodbye. I do that with some of my straight friends too so I think that hugging is just in my nature.
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    Feb 27, 2011 2:03 PM GMT
    I don't have any gay friends. I have one, but we don't really talk gay stuff, what a pity icon_cry.gif

    If I did have a close gay buddy I'd always be talking about sex, guys and gay stuff in general.
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    Feb 27, 2011 2:03 PM GMT
    gay friends is a tricky situation, i have many (in fact im a host of a gay friends group here in San Antonio). I treat them like every other friend we hug n stuff.

    I can usually tell when a guy starts to like me , the hugs get longer, they get more affectionate. Thats when i calm it down with them - cuz honestly it freaks me out a bit
  • manrobin

    Posts: 8

    Feb 27, 2011 2:10 PM GMT
    for me, when i say goodbye to gay friends , i will hug with them.
    somethimes when we talk with each other online, i will say, baby,honey, ......
    but in real life if we meet in bar or some place, it's just like good friends .
    it's very good to have some gay friends that they are real friends nor for sex.
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    Feb 27, 2011 2:14 PM GMT
    I always shake hands with them.
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    Feb 27, 2011 2:40 PM GMT
    Hmmmmm well I only have a couple kinda new gay friends who were not previous sexual buddies ;p - we greet each other with a hand-grasp or the occassional hug I guess ...Same as with my straight mates =]

    I did have one ex who I tried to be friends with after the break-up who was toooooooo much with the constant arm-locking when walking down the streets, hand holding, hair-touching, leg-caressing- just too invasive and uncomfortabe for me seeing as though I didn't have any feelings for him beyond friendship (and even if i did, still too much). I told him, it made no difference. We're no longer friends.

    I was sorta seeing this guy I Reallllyyyyyyyyy liked a few months ago and he took me to my first gay club. His best friend was also there. A bitchy gaysian, who he used to bang wayyy back in the day. The best friend kept on caressing my guys leg, giving a bit-too-long mouth kiss and even 'jokingly' grabbing his crotch in front on me and his own nonplussed bf. I thought it was too much and almost like he was trying to 'claim' my guy in front of me, but as i wasn't too aware of what was normal between gay friends and their affectionate behaviour, I bit my tongue. icon_evil.gif

  • Import

    Posts: 7190

    Feb 27, 2011 4:02 PM GMT
    My gay and straight friends usually a handshake or a hug, depending. If its been mad long since i've seen them than yes, ill give them a hug, if I just saw them yesterday or I see them on a frequent basis, usually some slappin and dappin is good enough icon_cool.gif
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    Feb 27, 2011 4:09 PM GMT
    If i go out and meet a friend of a friend we start with a handshake "nice to meet you, blah blah". I never remember their names the first time. when we say goodbye its usually with a hug and "it was nice meeting you".

    if its a friend i already know then its hug to say hi and bye.

    if its a very close friend its hug, kiss on the cheek, and if sober enough probably an "love you". we might walk arm in arm when we're out at night.

    haven't mind doing this in public so far.
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    Feb 27, 2011 4:22 PM GMT
    Hugs occasionally. we alway call each other bitch as a way showing the closeness.
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    Feb 27, 2011 4:26 PM GMT
    I am a hugger ...gay or not ...icon_smile.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 28, 2011 1:34 AM GMT
    A hug is always good.

    I did make out with one of my friends, but only to make is ex jealous.
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    Oct 15, 2011 5:05 PM GMT
    Usually a warm hug and a quick peck on the cheek, straight and gay. Who doesn't like that :-)
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    Oct 15, 2011 5:09 PM GMT
    AvadaKedavra saidIf i go out and meet a friend of a friend we start with a handshake "nice to meet you, blah blah". I never remember their names the first time. when we say goodbye its usually with a hug and "it was nice meeting you".

    if its a friend i already know then its hug to say hi and bye.

    if its a very close friend its hug, kiss on the cheek, and if sober enough probably an "love you". we might walk arm in arm when we're out at night.

    haven't mind doing this in public so far.


    Here in Atlanta, I see women walking arm in arm more often in public and it doesn't have to do with their sexual preference or anything. I think men should do this more often in public but I know it will cause such an uproar. There are a few places we can get away with it here but for the most part, it will cause some tension.
  • rebelbeard

    Posts: 558

    Oct 15, 2011 5:13 PM GMT
    Columbusite777 saidHow affectionate are you guys with your gay male friends? And I mean actual, real friends; not friends with benefits and the like.

    With most, if not all of my friends, when seeing them or saying good-bye, I'll more often than not give them a hug and kiss on the cheek or lips; for some of my very close friends, we'll even say 'love you' as we are saying good-bye. And sometimes I'll even walk arm-in-arm with them if we are going out for the evening.

    I know that some gay men can be rather uncomfortable with these displays of friendship.



    My close friends and I are the exact same way! You described us to the T!
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    Oct 15, 2011 5:19 PM GMT
    Depends on how clearly I need to define the friend boundary... I have, maybe, 3 gay friends who I say are really close. Part of the reason they are so close to me is because there is no sexual tension between us. Not that they aren't attractive, they are, but for one reason or another we never went in that direction. So I let myself be affectionate with them, knowing that the boundaries are very clear.

    I have other friends that I need more boundaries with, either because they aren't especially close to me, or because there is or was sexual tension. There are a few friends who I've sex with that I'll hug, but other than that I maintain an arm's length with them.

    But usually with friends, straight or gay, male or female, I don't mind a hug. For acquaintances it's a handshake. If I have never invited you to lunch, we don't hug haha.
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    Oct 15, 2011 5:20 PM GMT
    HighOctane said
    Columbusite777 saidHow affectionate are you guys with your gay male friends? And I mean actual, real friends; not friends with benefits and the like.

    With most, if not all of my friends, when seeing them or saying good-bye, I'll more often than not give them a hug and kiss on the cheek or lips; for some of my very close friends, we'll even say 'love you' as we are saying good-bye. And sometimes I'll even walk arm-in-arm with them if we are going out for the evening.

    I know that some gay men can be rather uncomfortable with these displays of friendship.



    My close friends and I are the exact same way! You described us to the T!



    yeah, pretty much same for me too. i'm tactile by nature anyway, so, hugs for errbody! icon_biggrin.gif
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    Oct 15, 2011 5:21 PM GMT
    DarkSensation said

    I suck their Dicks as a way of Saying Hello icon_lol.gif


    Ooh, let's be friends! ;)