So being poz just never came up?! Wtf?!

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 06, 2011 11:13 PM GMT
    I know a guy. I wouldn't really consider him a friend as we talk maybe 1-2 times a year to catch & really never were to close.

    With both of us being poz we would ask each other advice on different topics including relationship advice. He always seemed like a great, hot guy that I wouldve loved going out with but I was in a relationship so we never persued it.

    I talked to him recently & hes been dating someone for about a year now. I asked how he handled telling his new partner about being poz....he says...."well it still hasn't come up"! WHAT?!

    I was so furious I had to get off the phone & wont attempt to contact him again. Let this be a lesson to all of you out there involved or dating who think they can "trust" their new partner.

    Believe me as I know because my ex gave it to me & I believe he knew the whole time he had it. There are guys out there concealing this info so they will have a better chance of finding "love" & "acceptance"

    Protect yourself, because no one else will, even when they say they love you.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 06, 2011 11:47 PM GMT
    This is why practicing safe sex, when you're neg and STD-free, means assuming every new guy you meet has got something, and always using protections. And if you're poz, safe sex means telling the other guy up front, and also using protection with him.

    Even if this other guy has been doing safe sex, he's still under obligation to tell his sex partners, so they can make an informed choice. My late partner told me he was poz before we ever met in person, and I chose to continue with the relationship. But if he had hidden it from me, I doubt we would have stayed together once I learned.

    It's not a matter of the subject not having "come up" you BRING it up. Therefore I can understand why you got so angry with him.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 07, 2011 1:14 AM GMT
    Ugh that is such a scary thing! I can't even imagine how many times this really happens. This makes me want to never have unprotected sex in my life, even if I am in a 20 year monogamous relationship.

    Thanks for sharing this though! This is stuff that people need to know and realize.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 07, 2011 1:23 AM GMT
    indeed, you offered the right advice in your last sentence... 'protect yourself'. you should ask your potential partners their status. of course, you realize that people lie right? so the best advice is to assume everyone is positive and not change your sexual behavior based on what a potential partner tells you. that's not smart. if having casual sex makes one uncomfortable because of the risk of exposure to a host of diseases, the only 'safe' answer is abstinence.

    now i realize the situation you described is different. how one would get one year into a relationship without discussing the subject is beyond me. maybe the other guy is also positive and doesn't mind not discussing it. whatever the case may be, i think you lost an opportunity for calm, reasoned education. it would have been interesting to pick his brain to find out why he thought withholding that info was OK... and to tell him it wasn't.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 07, 2011 1:26 AM GMT
    Related: http://images.encyclopediadramatica.com/images/7/76/AIDS-gayforums.jpg
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 07, 2011 1:34 AM GMT
    redbull said
    Believe me as I know because my ex gave it to me & I believe he knew the whole time he had it.

    Wow. I'm sorry to hear that.
    Just remember play safe and always ask for documentation. icon_cool.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 07, 2011 1:39 AM GMT
    AndrewDavidAlexander saidRelated: http://images.encyclopediadramatica.com/images/7/76/AIDS-gayforums.jpg


    Ugh. I am glad I read that and wish I didn't at the same time. I can't believe there are people like that in the world.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 07, 2011 1:40 AM GMT
    I have a friend who made dinner for a man who was positive...he cut his finger in the process. Afterwards, he gave him a handjob. (romantic right?) The guy didn't say he was positive. I guess he saw no harm in it. He came on his hand and in the cut. Absolutely tragic. The man later told him he was positive so he freaked and went and got tested. He is now positive. I think it's one of the first bits of information you should share.
  • byronicheros

    Posts: 211

    Mar 07, 2011 1:57 AM GMT
    This exact same thing happened to me! I talked to a guy online for about 2 hours, casually. It was typically sexual conversation. I finally met him in New York a year ago, I had sex with him--first with a condom, but then it slipped off. I figured, "oh well"...he would have told me if he had anything, right? Or heck, he'll say something now since we're cool like that, right? WRONG. The fucker saw me without a condom, and he didn't say shit.

    Luckily and actually God-sent; I was in Central Park meeting a friend the next day. Since both guys were DJ's, I figured that I'd ask my friend if he knew the guy I slept with last night. Low AND behold, Kevin actually knew this douche bag and said, "he's positive". It was the first thing that came out of his mouth. I couldn't breathe. The world went spinning.

    I immediately called this douche bag and said, "hey, the condom slipped off last night while I was fucking you, but you're clean right?" He said, "No, I'm positive..." WTF!

    So, yes...douche bags do exist. And they're everywhere. Protect yourself, people because nobody else will.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 07, 2011 2:04 AM GMT
    Thanks for this post because the last line is SO true.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 07, 2011 2:07 AM GMT
    Interesting topic. I went on a date with a poz guy and he told me on the way back to the house that he was. I was trying to come up with an answer and response, and I just couldn't. He took this as being offended and I told him that I wasn't scared off by it. He felt relieved. We had safe sex, and I recently tested negative again. I'll keep up on my tests and the condom remained on at all times.

    Some of my best friends are positive and I love them for them. We have very different tastes in men! icon_smile.gif

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 07, 2011 2:07 AM GMT
    byronicheros said
    So, yes...douche bags do exist. And they're everywhere.


    I take it that you don't own any mirrors...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 07, 2011 2:08 AM GMT
    guy94hg59 saidI have a friend who made dinner for a man who was positive...he cut his finger in the process. Afterwards, he gave him a handjob. (romantic right?) The guy didn't say he was positive. I guess he saw no harm in it. He came on his hand and in the cut. Absolutely tragic. The man later told him he was positive so he freaked and went and got tested. He is now positive. I think it's one of the first bits of information you should share.



    HAHAHA wth! Dam thats crazy hahahha. Just reading this makes me feel good about still being a virgin!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 07, 2011 2:15 AM GMT
    KSUOWL said
    AndrewDavidAlexander saidRelated: http://images.encyclopediadramatica.com/images/7/76/AIDS-gayforums.jpg


    Ugh. I am glad I read that and wish I didn't at the same time. I can't believe there are people like that in the world.


    Oh My Fucken God! I can't even....UGH!icon_cry.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 07, 2011 2:20 AM GMT
    I find it odd and a little unsettling that the question NEVER seems to get asked..........
    All the bitching but not one of the guys in the story ASKED first.

    Liars are out there but you cant blame a poz guy for not saying anything if you dont ASK. Its part of the shared responsibility.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 07, 2011 2:23 AM GMT
    strange-aids-poster.jpg
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 07, 2011 2:23 AM GMT
    byronicheros saidThis exact same thing happened to me! I talked to a guy online for about 2 hours, casually. It was typically sexual conversation. I finally met him in New York a year ago, I had sex with him--first with a condom, but then it slipped off. I figured, "oh well"...he would have told me if he had anything, right? Or heck, he'll say something now since we're cool like that, right? WRONG. The fucker saw me without a condom, and he didn't say shit.

    Luckily and actually God-sent; I was in Central Park meeting a friend the next day. Since both guys were DJ's, I figured that I'd ask my friend if he knew the guy I slept with last night. Low AND behold, Kevin actually knew this douche bag and said, "he's positive". It was the first thing that came out of his mouth. I couldn't breathe. The world went spinning.

    I immediately called this douche bag and said, "hey, the condom slipped off last night while I was fucking you, but you're clean right?" He said, "No, I'm positive..." WTF!

    So, yes...douche bags do exist. And they're everywhere. Protect yourself, people because nobody else will.


    I generally try to refrain from posting on the all the idiots on this site, and this thread is loaded with them, but you are their King. By your own posting, you had sex with someone you didnt know and didnt initiate any kind of status discussion before having sex, you clearly dont know how to fit a condom because they dont simply "slip off", and even then you didnt ask any questions about status, "I figured, "oh well"...he would have told me if he had anything, right?" your words. You simply walked away hoping everything was all right. When you finally got an ounce of common sense and asked an intelligent question, he didnt lie to you, he told you the truth, and hes the douche bag? Check your reflection and grow up and take some responsibility for your own actions, your own decisions and your own health.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 07, 2011 2:26 AM GMT
    I'm wondering why the bf of redbull's friend never brought it up either. That's odd.

    The advice Bill and I give single guys is to do what we did. If it is serious love,
    you both to a doctor, together, and get tested, together, and go back for your results TOGETHER. We did this first when we discovered we were in love with each other, again at 6 months and again at 12.

    -Doug

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 07, 2011 2:32 AM GMT
    AndrewDavidAlexander saidRelated: http://images.encyclopediadramatica.com/images/7/76/AIDS-gayforums.jpg


    Skimming this made me sick to my stomach... but its a great wake up call to all of us young guys to stay vigilant.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 07, 2011 2:32 AM GMT
    KSUOWL said
    AndrewDavidAlexander saidRelated: http://images.encyclopediadramatica.com/images/7/76/AIDS-gayforums.jpg


    Ugh. I am glad I read that and wish I didn't at the same time. I can't believe there are people like that in the world.


    just read it also and really think it's disgusting. Can it really be that there are people in the world like this? WHY would they do it?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 07, 2011 2:38 AM GMT
    byronicheros saidThis exact same thing happened to me! I talked to a guy online for about 2 hours, casually. It was typically sexual conversation. I finally met him in New York a year ago, I had sex with him--first with a condom, but then it slipped off. I figured, "oh well"...he would have told me if he had anything, right? Or heck, he'll say something now since we're cool like that, right? WRONG. The fucker saw me without a condom, and he didn't say shit.

    Luckily and actually God-sent; I was in Central Park meeting a friend the next day. Since both guys were DJ's, I figured that I'd ask my friend if he knew the guy I slept with last night. Low AND behold, Kevin actually knew this douche bag and said, "he's positive". It was the first thing that came out of his mouth. I couldn't breathe. The world went spinning.

    I immediately called this douche bag and said, "hey, the condom slipped off last night while I was fucking you, but you're clean right?" He said, "No, I'm positive..." WTF!

    So, yes...douche bags do exist. And they're everywhere. Protect yourself, people because nobody else will.


    This happens more often than one realizes. There are many poz guys who won't say a word about their status and will even lie about it just so you will have sex with them. They know that if they tell you, then you will not want to have sex with them and they will have a hard time getting sex from anyone. With the 3-6 month window, even if the guy was just tested and has documentation that says he is neg., even that documentation does not mean he is neg. His poz infection may be too recent yet to show up on a test. Many guys get regularly tested and they think that if they receive a neg. result, they are neg., but this is not always the case and they infect many others, who also start infecting others and this is how it continues to spread.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 07, 2011 2:41 AM GMT
    esails said
    byronicheros saidThis exact same thing happened to me! I talked to a guy online for about 2 hours, casually. It was typically sexual conversation. I finally met him in New York a year ago, I had sex with him--first with a condom, but then it slipped off. I figured, "oh well"...he would have told me if he had anything, right? Or heck, he'll say something now since we're cool like that, right? WRONG. The fucker saw me without a condom, and he didn't say shit.

    Luckily and actually God-sent; I was in Central Park meeting a friend the next day. Since both guys were DJ's, I figured that I'd ask my friend if he knew the guy I slept with last night. Low AND behold, Kevin actually knew this douche bag and said, "he's positive". It was the first thing that came out of his mouth. I couldn't breathe. The world went spinning.

    I immediately called this douche bag and said, "hey, the condom slipped off last night while I was fucking you, but you're clean right?" He said, "No, I'm positive..." WTF!

    So, yes...douche bags do exist. And they're everywhere. Protect yourself, people because nobody else will.


    I generally try to refrain from posting on the all the idiots on this site, and this thread is loaded with them, but you are their King. By your own posting, you had sex with someone you didnt know and didnt initiate any kind of status discussion before having sex, you clearly dont know how to fit a condom because they dont simply "slip off", and even then you didnt ask any questions about status, "I figured, "oh well"...he would have told me if he had anything, right?" your words. You simply walked away hoping everything was all right. When you finally got an ounce of common sense and asked an intelligent question, he didnt lie to you, he told you the truth, and hes the douche bag? Check your reflection and grow up and take some responsibility for your own actions, your own decisions and your own health.

    BING-fucking-GO! Awesome reply!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 07, 2011 2:49 AM GMT
    AndrewDavidAlexander saidRelated: http://images.encyclopediadramatica.com/images/7/76/AIDS-gayforums.jpg


    All of them made me want to throw up but ESPECIALLY the purple one. That legitimately upset me.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 07, 2011 2:55 AM GMT
    pelicanfly said
    AndrewDavidAlexander saidRelated: http://images.encyclopediadramatica.com/images/7/76/AIDS-gayforums.jpg


    All of them made me want to throw up but ESPECIALLY the purple one. That legitimately upset me.


    I don't know. The one above it in the white made me almost lose hope in all of humanity. He wants to drug his son and infect him? Really?! icon_cry.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 07, 2011 2:59 AM GMT
    Why are you guys even reading that garbage?

    You guys should know by now that nothing good comes from that site or the poster.

    SEX MACHINE:
    HOT.jpg