Is Talking During Sex Often Annoying?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 09, 2011 6:31 AM GMT
    I had a partner a while ago who could never resist talking during sex. What's worse! He would always get more insistent when I didn't respond!

    Some typical phrases: "Are you okay?" "How does that feel?" and my favorite, "What do you wanna do?"

    I would usually ignore him. For some reason I feel like talking is the easy way out (and consequently the less sexy). There are other forms of communication that are often missed when there's a whole lot of talking going on. That's how I feel anyways....

    Am I right? icon_confused.gif
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    Mar 09, 2011 9:15 AM GMT
    No. You should only fuck mind readers who know if you are having a good time. Christ, what an asshole for checking in with you to make sure you are getting off.

    What is worse, you don't like this and yet you evidently haven't told him.

    There is no such thing as a mind reader. Stop acting like you are fucking one.
  • BCSwimmer

    Posts: 209

    Mar 09, 2011 9:19 AM GMT
    I think it's a matter of personal preference. Personally, depending on the situation, a lot of talking can be a bit off-putting or it can be hot.

    However I think it is completely appropriate to have some communication to determine what your partner likes or doesn't like or if you are unsure what your partner's reaction means.

    While I like the idea of endure nothing some people will momentarily tolerate something longer than others and as a result I've found that sometimes a guy's reaction can be unclear.

    For example: when lightly pinching a guy's nipple, if he gives a short low grunt it could indicate that he is really enjoying it or it may mean that he is expressing displeasure. That's why I feel it's important to clarify what non-verbal communications mean by asking something like "is that okay?". (Obviously if someone is more clear and says "YES, do that harder" or "OW!, please don't pinch -- my nipples are too sensitive" then asking clearly wouldn't be necessary).

    I'm curious how you can be sure, by non-verbal cues alone, that your partner is being satisfied AND what do you do if your partner starts doing something to you that you don't find pleasurable or even more so causes discomfort of pain?
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    Mar 09, 2011 9:28 AM GMT
    Zomboner saidNo. You should only fuck mind readers who know if you are having a good time. Christ, what an asshole for checking in with you to make sure you are getting off.

    What is worse, you don't like this and yet you evidently haven't told him.

    There is no such thing as a mind reader. Stop acting like you are fucking one.


    icon_lol.gif
    you should probably calm down. im obviously not talking about you!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 09, 2011 9:40 AM GMT
    BCSwimmer saidI think it's a matter of personal preference. Personally, depending on the situation, a lot of talking can be a bit off-putting or it can be hot.

    However I think it is completely appropriate to have some communication to determine what your partner likes or doesn't like or if you are unsure what your partner's reaction means.

    While I like the idea of endure nothing some people will momentarily tolerate something longer than others and as a result I've found that sometimes a guy's reaction can be unclear.

    For example: when lightly pinching a guy's nipple, if he gives a short low grunt it could indicate that he is really enjoying it or it may mean that he is expressing displeasure. That's why I feel it's important to clarify what non-verbal communications mean by asking something like "is that okay?". (Obviously if someone is more clear and says "YES, do that harder" or "OW!, please don't pinch -- my nipples are too sensitive" then asking clearly wouldn't be necessary).

    I'm curious how you can be sure, by non-verbal cues alone, that your partner is being satisfied AND what do you do if your partner starts doing something to you that you don't find pleasurable or even more so causes discomfort of pain?


    I mean, it's not like we broke up because I couldn't take the talking during sex. I'm just saying, I find that I don't like the additional talking, as opposed to guys (whom I've experienced) who are just more adept at figuring out what the nonverbal cues are.

    And it's not like I'm saying talking should be forbidden. There obviously has to be some speaking when transitioning and changing positions. But in the more intimate moments "Ouch" and "Ooh" are still very descriptive.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 09, 2011 12:29 PM GMT
    Feedback, people. Am I really just unreasonable..?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 09, 2011 12:48 PM GMT
    Worst thing your partner can say during sex: "Is it in?"
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    Mar 09, 2011 12:51 PM GMT
    paulflexes saidWorst thing your partner can say during sex: "Is it in?"


    haha. that's a bummer icon_razz.gif
  • kew1

    Posts: 1595

    Mar 09, 2011 1:02 PM GMT
    paulflexes saidWorst thing your partner can say during sex: "Is it in?"


    Or "Hi Mum, how are you?" .
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    Mar 09, 2011 1:05 PM GMT
    kew1 said
    paulflexes saidWorst thing your partner can say during sex: "Is it in?"


    Or "Hi Mum, how are you?" .
    Or "Dayum! You're ass is almost tight as my Pomeranian's!"
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 09, 2011 1:15 PM GMT
    personally, i find talking during sex makes me more aroused. a little, "yeah, that feels good," "bite it... harder," "who's your daddy" gets me every time. lol.
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    Mar 09, 2011 1:22 PM GMT
    sean_zuri saidpersonally, i find talking during sex makes me more aroused. a little, "yeah, that feels good," "bite it... harder," "who's your daddy" gets me every time. lol.


    LOL

    Point taken. But still, that's not the same as someone literally asking you questions he expects you to answer, and then repeating the question when you treat it as rhetorical. (Unless each time you don't respond he slaps your ass harder. That's different. That's hot. icon_twisted.gif )
  • Celticmusl

    Posts: 4330

    Mar 09, 2011 1:39 PM GMT
    I had an ex that liked me to be verbal during sex, and towards the end of about 5 yrs I started running out of words and new ways of saying the same things over and over again, lol.
  • fitdude62

    Posts: 294

    Mar 09, 2011 1:57 PM GMT
    Sex is a form of communication. Talking is permitted as communication. I dont mind talking at all...unless he is talking about Sarah Palin...thats a total turn off......icon_lol.gif

    Peace
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    Mar 09, 2011 2:05 PM GMT
    fitdude62 saidSex is a form of communication. Talking is permitted as communication. I dont mind talking at all...unless he is talking about Sarah Palin...thats a total turn off......icon_lol.gif

    Peace


    Form of communication..? icon_confused.gif

    That's a stretch. I don't think anyone has sex with someone because they're trying to get a message across. Or at least few people do (i.e. hate sex, make-up sex, sex with a potential business partner).

    But even if we say typical sex is a form of "communication", it would be a rather implicit form of communication: like, say, art or poetry. The kind of "talking during sex" to which I was referring, however, would be a distinctly explicit form of communication, and therefore altogether different - and, in my case, usually unwelcome. icon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 09, 2011 2:18 PM GMT
    eh, guess imma weirdo...
  • alphatop

    Posts: 1955

    Mar 09, 2011 2:22 PM GMT
    Yes, u r right. I find talking during sex ( Is it in? WTF??) extremely annoying.icon_confused.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 09, 2011 2:23 PM GMT
    ewe_nik saideh, guess imma weirdo...


    exactly, he probably asks because your "non verbal" indicators are as confusing as your written communication. and/or your attitude relays disdain.
  • a303guy

    Posts: 829

    Mar 09, 2011 2:26 PM GMT
    fitdude62 saidSex is a form of communication. Talking is permitted as communication. I dont mind talking at all...unless he is talking about Sarah Palin...thats a total turn off......icon_lol.gif

    Peace


    Yes, sex IS a form of communication - its the most intimate way you can convey your feelings to your partner/lover/fuckbuddy/whatever. and yes, talking during sex is absolutely correct, provided, like fit dude alluded to above - the talk digresses into something not related, or, like sarah palin...just gross...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 09, 2011 2:28 PM GMT
    if it's that bad just suggest him to use a gag! tell him it turns you on! there ALL your "problems" are solved!
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    Mar 09, 2011 2:30 PM GMT
    If he's talking about the weather or his to-do list, that's a turnoff. If he's grabbing my ass while I'm buried to the balls in his and he moans, "Oh yeah baby, fuck it, fuck it, fuck it. You dirty mother fucker, fuck it." I'm down with that. I can think of nothing worse than sex with a corpse.
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    Mar 09, 2011 2:39 PM GMT
    Eh talking is okay I guess. I much prefer being read to during sex though. Usually the NY Times Sunday Magazine, or some Robert Burns poetry. If I'm feeling really kinky I have an old set of VCR programming instructions that get me going.
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    Mar 09, 2011 2:45 PM GMT
    i talk during sex....certainly helps keep me and my man trapped together in our hot moment...neither find it annoying.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 09, 2011 2:46 PM GMT
    Depends on what's being said.
    Any reference to an ass as a pussy and I'll lose an erection.
    But guttural moans and panting, as well as suddenly growled expletives are always welcome.
  • Timbales

    Posts: 13993

    Mar 09, 2011 2:54 PM GMT
    5'9", blue eyes, hairy chest seeks hung mute for NSA action.