WTF?? Have You Had This Happen to You?

• Joeyphx444
  
  Posts: 2387
  
  
  Mar 10, 2011 5:34 AM GMT

  So I had talked to this guy on here in Nov and we talked almost everyday on here and thru txting, skype. He lives near where my family is and I go to visit them during Christmas break. We decided we could meet when I travel there. So December cam and maybe a week or two b4 I am set to leave I don't hear anything from him. No call, no txt, nothing. I sent txts/call, msg, etc and no response. I haven't talked to this guy since December.
  
  Have you had guys just plain stop talking for you for no apparent reason? I don't understand. We talked a lot and really hit it off as much as we could online. I don't think he got a bf. He still has me on his friend's list here and on FB
  
  (BTW, I am over it, I am just wondering if this has happened to you and if you guys were able to find a reason or ask the guy if he started talking again)

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  Mar 10, 2011 6:12 AM GMT

  Maybe he's insecure and got a cold-feet, thinking you might not actually like what he REALLY looks like? That's the only reason i can think of. Other than that, he might just be genuinely busy with something and hasn't had a chance to connect with u, but i doubt it.
  
  I've never met anyone on RJ that's far away so I wouldn't know.

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  Mar 10, 2011 6:16 AM GMT

  Yes, it has.

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  Mar 10, 2011 6:59 AM GMT

  My first guess is he isn't who he was portraying himself to be. For example did he tell you he was single etc.. did you ever see him live on skype? If he said he was single he probably wasn't so your going there and wanting to meet up in real life ended the "fantasy" for him

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  Mar 10, 2011 7:06 AM GMT

  I've had it happen a few times, only to have those same guys pop up again and start messaging me several months later. I just give them the benefit of the doubt and assume they were busy or preoccupied. It's quite possible since I've done the same thing too.

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  Mar 10, 2011 7:18 AM GMT

  Assumed this to be a common thing to happen in the world of online chatting.
  
  I reckon for many guys it's just about chat and a feeling of escapism they get from that. Probably never intend it to go any furthrer.
  
  I prefer to meet up but accept that many I chat with are as I descibe above.
  
  Frustrating yeh, but just how it is. Appreciate the ones you do connect with though,

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  Mar 10, 2011 1:46 PM GMT

  I've had it happen so many times I could write a book about it. I've come to believe there is no flakier being than a homosexual male.

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  Mar 10, 2011 1:47 PM GMT

  Yeah it did happen to me too.
  I just dont know why do some guys do that

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• alphatop
  
  Posts: 1955
  
  
  Mar 10, 2011 1:49 PM GMT

  Joeyphx444 saidSo I had talked to this guy on here in Nov and we talked almost everyday on here and thru txting, skype. He lives near where my family is and I go to visit them during Christmas break. We decided we could meet when I travel there. So December cam and maybe a week or two b4 I am set to leave I don't hear anything from him. No call, no txt, nothing. I sent txts/call, msg, etc and no response. I haven't talked to this guy since December.
  
  Have you had guys just plain stop talking for you for no apparent reason? I don't understand. We talked a lot and really hit it off as much as we could online. I don't think he got a bf. He still has me on his friend's list here and on FB
  
  (BTW, I am over it, I am just wondering if this has happened to you and if you guys were able to find a reason or ask the guy if he started talking again)

  
  
  
  Stick with that hot tattooed hairdresser from your gym

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• HndsmKansan
  
  Posts: 16388
  
  
  Mar 10, 2011 1:50 PM GMT

  It certainly can happen, especially if you are just an "acquaintance" online who he has never met.. easy to dismiss and priorities of "real life" can sometimes intervene. It may have nothing to do with you, but the guy just
  had other things happen. Polite? No... but it can happen.

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• tuffguyndc
  
  Posts: 4437
  
  
  Mar 10, 2011 1:59 PM GMT

  i am sorry that this happened to you buddy. i do not know what to say about this. i have never had this to happen but it just might be he may have found someone closer and didn't want to tell you

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  Mar 10, 2011 3:30 PM GMT

  It's probably happened to anyone whose ever put themselves "out there." So you're not special; welcome to cyber world where under the cloak of anonymity people can be themselves, which unfortunately and all too often means self-centered, rude, etc. No one is ever so busy that they cannot take the time to respond to a text or e-mail. So unless he's dead or laid up in the hospital, I vote rude, self-centered.

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  Mar 10, 2011 3:39 PM GMT

  Or hey it's just the internet.... It's not real for alot of people and it's scary to some people to invite internet people into their everyday real life..
  
  Maybe you should send him something over the internet that you didn't mean to come across so strongly and that chatting with him was absolutely fine.
  
  If you are looking for a real relationship with someone you met over the internet it's best you are a lucky guy who occassionally strikes gold or oil while walking through the city.
  
  Most people with regular luck don't find true love in virtual reality.

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• rf_dal
  
  Posts: 380
  
  
  Mar 10, 2011 3:43 PM GMT

  I had this discussion before I think, and the general consensus was online people are flaky, gays are flaky, so online + gay = SUPER FLAKE and never assume anything will pan out until it actually does. ;)

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  Mar 10, 2011 3:49 PM GMT

  I don't think it's flaky as much as that it's not always a good idea to combine your internet life with your real life.
  
  Sometimes it works. Mostly it don't
  
  

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  Mar 10, 2011 4:00 PM GMT

  Maybe he's just not that into you.
  
  There are millions of other men out there dude....pick another one.
  
  Don't waste anymore time.

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• DanOmatic
  
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  Mar 10, 2011 4:01 PM GMT

  Yes, I had a similar experience with a guy I "cyber met" via Real Jock. Great guy, very interesting--after some IM'ing and emails we began Skyping on a regular basis, which went on for about a month or so. When I suggested that we should try to meet at some point, he first got squirrely and vague; after the second time suggesting it, he stopped communication altogether without any explanation.
  
  It was strange, since we always had really substantial conversations, but after one or two attempts to revive the conversation, I bowed out of communicating further.
  
  For me, it was more confusing than hurtful. It was a good reminder, though, of how ephemeral this stuff is, and that is useless to invest too much in internet communication--unless it's followed up by real-life interaction.
  
  

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• gym_rat_7
  
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  Mar 10, 2011 4:04 PM GMT

  muscles4muscles saidI've had it happen so many times I could write a book about it. I've come to believe there is no flakier being than a homosexual male.

  
  
  AMEN to that !

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• Ironman4U
  
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  Mar 10, 2011 4:22 PM GMT

  Yea, I've had it happen. No fun when you think you have a connection and you realize that nothing's there. But there are definitely some flakes and fakes out there who like to play games.
  
  That being said, I've met some great guys too from online connections. So don't let one bad apple spoil the bunch. Just know that until you actually meet, you can't be too sure.

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  Mar 10, 2011 4:47 PM GMT

  rf_dal saidI had this discussion before I think, and the general consensus was online people are flaky, gays are flaky, so online + gay = SUPER FLAKE and never assume anything will pan out until it actually does. ;)

  
  
  
  So, true. Sad, but true none the less.

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  Mar 10, 2011 5:03 PM GMT

  Remember many guys online may not be out and use the internet as a way of fulfilling sexual repressions.they get scared to meet.

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  Mar 10, 2011 5:03 PM GMT

  lol, this has been going on for far longer than there ever was an internet.
  
  "Have you had guys just plain stop talking for you for no apparent reason?"
  
  Yes, and when that happened the first time I was pretty upset and tried my damnedest to find out why. I couldn't. The next time it happened the upset was much less because I'd learned something about me.
  
  I didn't want to be wasting time on anyone that had a habit of cutting people off. It made it REALLY easy to let any man go that did this.
  
  -Doug
  
  

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  Mar 10, 2011 7:05 PM GMT

  AnonymousBart saidI don't think it's flaky as much as that it's not always a good idea to combine your internet life with your real life.
  
  Sometimes it works. Mostly it don't
  
  

  
  
  
  Anxiety attach?!

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  Mar 10, 2011 7:15 PM GMT

  A "date" with ANY GAY GUY is the most unpleasant company I have ever had... It was a shame sex was all they were good for, catch my drift? My life is full of so much love and my cup even runneth over... So why should I waste my time with another useless gay relationship? I learned the Truth the hard way but, thank GOD before my life was over I did at least discover that Truth!!!!!!!

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  Mar 10, 2011 7:22 PM GMT

  muscles4muscles saidI've had it happen so many times I could write a book about it. I've come to believe there is no flakier being than a homosexual male.

  
  
  Or just males in general. Ask any of your straight female friends if this happens to them.
  
  
  "Men are pigs and I happen to love bacon!"

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