Parenting Feminine Boys & The Pressure To Conform

  • metta

    Posts: 44710

    Mar 14, 2011 8:32 PM GMT
    Parenting Feminine Boys & The Pressure To Conform

    If I was a parent, I'm not so sure how I would handle some of these situations.

    Honestly, I don't think that a boy wanting to wear a dress has anything to do with ending up gay. I grew up with sisters and never had any desire or thought of wanting to wear their clothes. It may just be a phase that these children go through or maybe they may become crossdressers when they are older...or possibly transgendered....I really don't know.
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    Mar 14, 2011 11:15 PM GMT
    That was brilliant and provocative and I think she is doing everything a parent should do. Don't force him to be something he doesn't want to be but DO teach him how to defend himself against bullies. Teach him to be strong and confident and don't worry about his tastes.

    I was given every opportunity to be a pink boy as I have three older sisters and the house was cluttered with girly toys when I arrived. I wanted to join them in their games and I hated it when they played girly games because they just seemed so stupid. Because of my sisters I had both boyfriends and girlfriends as a child. But I was far more interested in my hot wheel collection, the army jeeps , my neighbor's train set. I loved playing superman, or batman. My straight brother always wanted to be an Indian, I wanted to be the cowboy. I got my dad to buy Duke football and basketball tickets as he had no interest in sports. I had him put a basketball goal up in the driveway and buy me my first football.

    About the only thing that stuck with me from all the girly things my sisters were into was dancing. They had me dancing from the day I could walk and that was at nine months. I never understood why white boys couldn't dance. One day I'm dancing with my sister and she says, "where did you learn that move?" "This is the way the black guys at school dance." I answered. I would go on to learn the jitterbug, hustle, shag, salsa and be very popular with the girls on campus who wanted to dance with me. But when I was a little boy I distinctly remember seeing tap dancing on TV and being amazed. Thats what I want to do I said. So my older sister got me tap shoes and tried to teach me how to do it. It got out to the other boys in the neighborhood and they taunted me. I remember the pier pressure forcing me to throw my shoes away and I couldn't quite understand why. How fucked up is that?

    But I still knew I was different from the other boys. I knew I wasn’t supposed to get a hard on when I saw naked men. I knew my brother seemed much more interested in naked women then I could ever be. So she has a point. If you can have a Duke blue son who turns out to be gay, who is to say a pink boy won’t turn out to be straight. Come to think of it Carolina blue is so girly half the state should be gay.