virginity: is it important?

  • hng90

    Posts: 76

    Mar 15, 2011 5:30 AM GMT
    So I've been wondering if virginity in a gay community is a good or bad thing. I've talked to many guys and some think it is stupid to be a virgin. I mean, everybody's opinion is different but to me, I think it is beautiful to give your virginity to the right one that you love, right? But it is hard to find a right guy nowadays, also I have my need so (you just can't j/o for the rest of ur life LOL). I mean, I've met so many cute guys but all they wanted were just sex. So what do you guys think of this? Any advice?

    icon_redface.gificon_redface.gificon_redface.gif

    To me i think it is the culture thing since im raised in a very traditional family... i guess
    it is like a thing that u've been raised since u was born and when u grew up u realized it is a no big deal anymore but it's still in your head, like a dilemma to me...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 15, 2011 6:02 AM GMT
    If it's important to you, then it's important.
    If it's not important to you, then it's not important.
    Don't worry what others have to say about it.

    For me, I don't see why it's a big deal. As a guy you can't get pregnant. Are you hoping to wear a white dress on your wedding? Man can enjoy sex without emotional attachment.
    Sex is more fulfilling when it's with a loving partner, but it doesn't mean that you will have great sex with someone you love.


    If it's important for you to keep your v-card, make sure to tell potential dates that you won't be having sex for x number of dates/months. It will help you weed out the guys who are more into sex, and it's unfair for you to string along someone when you have no intention of sex for a while.
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    Mar 15, 2011 6:08 AM GMT
    hng90 saidSo I've been wondering if virginity in a gay community is a good or bad thing. I've talked to many guys and some think it is stupid to be a virgin. I mean, everybody's opinion is different but to me, I think it is beautiful to give your virginity to the right one that you love, right? But it is hard to find a right guy nowadays, also I have my need so (you just can't j/o for the rest of ur life LOL). I mean, I've met so many cute guys but all they wanted were just sex. So what do you guys think of this? Any advice?

    icon_redface.gificon_redface.gificon_redface.gif


    I have a strict no sex before love policy, which I have yet to break (though that's not saying much). I think its a matter of where you stand, not society's view thereof.
  • shiningstar

    Posts: 71

    Mar 15, 2011 6:23 AM GMT
    i think everyone has his own preferences,I think if u want to have sex then just do it don't wait for the right partner and obviously if u do sex with some one,in most of times there will be some emotions however not only love
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    Mar 15, 2011 2:03 PM GMT
    It depends on how you define "virginity." Does virginity to you mean not giving and/or receiving oral sex? Or does it mean not engaging in penetrative sex? If it's the former, I think it's a bit much, and you might be denying yourself one of the best indulgences this world has ever known. If it's the latter, I think that's understandable. In any event, you should do what in your best judgment is best for you.
  • hng90

    Posts: 76

    Mar 15, 2011 2:45 PM GMT
    thanks guys I'm stuck when i put it as a big deal while I honestly want to enjoy it... I think I should think it in a different way
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    Mar 15, 2011 3:05 PM GMT
    I waited to be in a relationship before having sex and I don't regret waiting one bit. Maybe try advertising yourself as looking for a relationship.
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    Mar 15, 2011 3:08 PM GMT
    hng90 said... I've met so many cute guys but all they wanted were just sex. So what do you guys think of this?
    I agree with them. icon_biggrin.gif
  • hng90

    Posts: 76

    Mar 15, 2011 7:16 PM GMT
    paulflexes said
    hng90 said... I've met so many cute guys but all they wanted were just sex. So what do you guys think of this?
    I agree with them. icon_biggrin.gif


    haha guys like that everywhere

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    Mar 15, 2011 7:17 PM GMT
    If you so choose.
  • rnch

    Posts: 11524

    Mar 15, 2011 7:18 PM GMT
    virgins (tops or bottoms) are wayyyyyyy over-rated, IMO.

    give me a guy who knows what he is doing!

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  • errol88

    Posts: 365

    Mar 15, 2011 7:20 PM GMT
    Does virginity even apply to men anymore?
  • hng90

    Posts: 76

    Mar 15, 2011 7:22 PM GMT
    errol88 saidDoes virginity even apply to men anymore?


    it does if u believe in it.... but it seems rare... so i guess its not an issue to most of guys
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    Mar 15, 2011 7:22 PM GMT
    I always thought that the whole concept of giving your Virginity away was a female thing (for biological reasons). I don't think it's an issue to many guys, perhaps the people with more restraints maybe make virginity a big deal, but generally I don't think it was important to me.
  • tuffguyndc

    Posts: 4437

    Mar 15, 2011 7:23 PM GMT
    i applaud anyone who can with stain from sex. i am not one of those people. secondly, i would not want a virgin because it hurts like hell trying to break someone in and that is with lube or in a woman's case she has natural lubrication. my dick hurts for days when someone is extremely tight. ha ha ha but seriously, dude you owe no one any excuse as to why you saving yourself. i say more power to you. i just want you to remember that most guys are not going to want to wait. if you are ok with that than you will be fine
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    Mar 15, 2011 7:25 PM GMT
    You'll have a blast after you give it up since you won't have to worry about this virginity non-sense anymore.
  • hng90

    Posts: 76

    Mar 15, 2011 7:32 PM GMT
    to me i think it is the culture thing since im raised in a very traditional family... i guess
    it is like a thing that u've been raised since u was born and when u grew up u realized it is a no big deal anymore but it's still in your head, like a dilemma to me...
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    Mar 15, 2011 7:34 PM GMT
    To each there own, but I perfer a guy with some experience under their belt and who knows what they can handle as well and what they do and don't enjoy. Don't know why so many gay guys want to fuck a virgin, for me it was more like work then sex to get them used to being fuck or fucking so that we could both enjoy the sex.
  • hng90

    Posts: 76

    Mar 15, 2011 7:36 PM GMT
    Simon78928 saidTo each there own, but I perfer a guy with some experience under their belt and who knows what they can handle as well and what they do and don't enjoy. Don't know why so many gay guys want to fuck a virgin, for me it was more like work then sex to get them used to being fuck or fucking so that we could both enjoy the sex.


    some appreciate it but some don't icon_rolleyes.gif
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    Mar 16, 2011 1:17 AM GMT
    You are overcomplicating things way too much.

    1) Don't let anyone else's opinion on you affect your personal lifestyle.
    2) If you value virginity, stay a virgin until you find that right someone, if not, don't.

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    Mar 16, 2011 1:45 AM GMT
    In the gay world virginity has little to no significance...Only your STD and HIV status' are important :-)
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    Mar 16, 2011 1:47 AM GMT
    Kanaka24 saidIn the gay world virginity has little to no significance...Only your STD and HIV status' are important :-)


    which shows how much people value sex. Just another phrase that further reinforces the stereotype of gay men. icon_rolleyes.gif
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    Mar 16, 2011 1:53 AM GMT
    Well man it's the truth. Who honestly asks before you meet someone for a date, hook up or anything! Are you a virgin?? It's a rarity if they do. Most frequent questions are ones about your health and own awareness of your status about any std's you may have. It's good though that it has meaning for someone your age considerig the statistics out there for the much younger crowd.
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    Mar 16, 2011 2:05 AM GMT
    hng90 said
    Simon78928 saidTo each there own, but I perfer a guy with some experience under their belt and who knows what they can handle as well and what they do and don't enjoy. Don't know why so many gay guys want to fuck a virgin, for me it was more like work then sex to get them used to being fuck or fucking so that we could both enjoy the sex.


    some appreciate it but some don't icon_rolleyes.gif


    I'm 21 and a virgin. I feel the same way like you do........... i want to have sex, but at the same time i want to have sex with a person i'm dating (boyfriend ). Problem is i'm not putting myself out there as much. Plus since i'm busy with school, sex is the last thing on my mind. In my experience, a lot of people i chatted with are freaked out by the word Virginity.

    "What? you're a virgin, but you're old".
    "I'm 21, not 51" lol.

    Just be proud of it and wait for the right person, but don't wait for too long also. lol
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 16, 2011 2:05 AM GMT
    hng90 saidto me i think it is the culture thing since im raised in a very traditional family... i guess
    it is like a thing that u've been raised since u was born and when u grew up u realized it is a no big deal anymore but it's still in your head, like a dilemma to me...


    I doubt very much that you were raised to be a homosexual. Str8 norms don't apply to homos.