Any non-cruising gay dating websites out there?

  • awm55

    Posts: 619

    Mar 16, 2011 4:40 AM GMT
    I can't seem to find any gay dating websites aside from real jock that are not absurdly sexually explicit and full of guys looking for sex. Any suggestions would be great.
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    Mar 16, 2011 6:04 PM GMT
    No such thing exists. We're all pigs.


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    Mar 17, 2011 12:05 AM GMT
    Come on in New York and you are definitely handsome?icon_biggrin.gif You should be able to find some great guys there..

    Try:

    *www.compatible partners.com
    *www.connexion.org
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    Mar 17, 2011 3:49 AM GMT
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    Mar 17, 2011 3:54 AM GMT
    second connexion.org.
  • neosyllogy

    Posts: 1714

    Mar 17, 2011 3:57 AM GMT
    OkCupid is nice and I've met a number of friends and some former lovers through there (most of all they have a great blog though icon_smile.gif )
    http://www.okcupid.com/
    It's not specifically gay, but plenty of gays on it.
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    Mar 17, 2011 2:18 PM GMT
    "Non-cruising gay (or any other) dating site" is an oxymoron.
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    Mar 17, 2011 2:31 PM GMT
    http://www.plentyoffish.com/

    You can choose what you're looking for: relationship, friends, dates, shag. But you can also block people from contacting you if they've listed "intimate encounter" and you're not open to it.
  • Bunjamon

    Posts: 3161

    Mar 17, 2011 3:04 PM GMT
    Is RJ such a bad place to start?
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    Mar 17, 2011 3:09 PM GMT
    neosyllogy saidOkCupid is nice and I've met a number of friends and some former lovers through there (most of all they have a great blog though icon_smile.gif )
    http://www.okcupid.com/
    It's not specifically gay, but plenty of gays on it.
    I would have to agree with this one. Definitely never appeared to be a cruising spot when I used it and I like the million questions that you answer as you go, as many as you wished but reading others responses really helps give you an idea of who they are.
  • tuffguyndc

    Posts: 4437

    Mar 17, 2011 3:11 PM GMT
    match.com, chemistry.com, and compatiablecompanion.com oh and you can try out connexion.org
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    Mar 17, 2011 3:18 PM GMT
    paulflexes said"Non-cruising gay (or any other) dating site" is an oxymoron.
    Even RJ is full of guys who do nothing but cruise. Trust me. The worst is when they're cradle robbing, imo. icon_eek.gif

    But Paul is right. No such site exists. There will always be gay dating sites where at least some members will want to just plain cruise.
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    Mar 17, 2011 3:28 PM GMT
    Another vote for OkCupid, it has minimal cruising it seems. Some people have great luck with it, others have none at all but it's worth a shot.
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    Mar 17, 2011 3:49 PM GMT
    Cruising sites are sleazy and should not exist.
  • laxdude25

    Posts: 604

    Mar 17, 2011 3:58 PM GMT
    I have heard very good things about ok cupid. I will say that given your London and NY base, I think the best way to meet guys if you are athletic is through the various gay/bi/str8 sports clubs/teams. In NY, I have played in the soccer league, but there are also good groups for running, rugby, hockey, etc. The guys are great, the vibe is great, and it is a very easy way to meet guys without sex being the first focus.
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    Mar 17, 2011 4:03 PM GMT
    DodgedBullet saidCruising sites are sleazy and should not exist.


    Thank you, Mary Whitehouse. LOL

    Hey, some people like them and they serve a purpose to some. Otherwise ManHunt wouldn't claim 4million+ profiles (a quarter of them American), or Gaydar about the same number and its co-founder listed as one of the top five most influential gay men in Britain--right after Sir Elton John and ahead of Sir Ian McKellen.
  • awm55

    Posts: 619

    Mar 17, 2011 4:09 PM GMT
    cdncuteboy said
    DodgedBullet saidCruising sites are sleazy and should not exist.


    Thank you, Mary Whitehouse. LOL

    Hey, some people like them and they serve a purpose to some. Otherwise ManHunt wouldn't claim 4million+ profiles (a quarter of them American), or Gaydar about the same number and its co-founder listed as one of the top five most influential gay men in Britain--right after Sir Elton John and ahead of Sir Ian McKellen.


    didn't the founder of gaydar die in a drug overdose? yeah, he's a great guy lol
  • fitdude62

    Posts: 294

    Mar 17, 2011 4:12 PM GMT
    Here at RJ you find the best people.

    Connexion.org is not bad either.

    Peace
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    Mar 17, 2011 4:21 PM GMT
    awm55 said
    cdncuteboy said
    DodgedBullet saidCruising sites are sleazy and should not exist.


    Thank you, Mary Whitehouse. LOL

    Hey, some people like them and they serve a purpose to some. Otherwise ManHunt wouldn't claim 4million+ profiles (a quarter of them American), or Gaydar about the same number and its co-founder listed as one of the top five most influential gay men in Britain--right after Sir Elton John and ahead of Sir Ian McKellen.


    didn't the founder of gaydar die in a drug overdose? yeah, he's a great guy lol


    It was the former business partner of the one I referred to... But I wasn't commenting on his character, I was saying he obviously saw a need in the market that wasn't being addressed. We don't have to like him.
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    Mar 17, 2011 4:31 PM GMT
    Bullwinklemoos said
    paulflexes said"Non-cruising gay (or any other) dating site" is an oxymoron.
    Even RJ is full of guys who do nothing but cruise. Trust me. The worst is when they're cradle robbing, imo. icon_eek.gif

    But Paul is right. No such site exists. There will always be gay dating sites where at least some members will want to just plain cruise.

    Well, a gay dating service without cruising would indeed seem to be an oxymoron. But I would dispute the OP statement "gay dating websites aside from real jock" which implies that RJ is a dating site.

    Not its primary focus, I believe, though certainly a very good gay social site, from which friendships and dating can happen. Look at all the guys from here I've met in person, and regularly chat with by e-mail & phone.

    And yeah, even I get unsolicited IMs and e-mails from strangers here, that I don't answer. But that's the rare person, not the nature or purpose of this site, in my view. I still wouldn't call this a dating or cruising site.
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    Mar 17, 2011 5:10 PM GMT
    People, seriously.

    It's not about the site. It's about your behavior on it and your usage of it!

    You could bloody well join manhunt or menfucknow.com or whatever and NEVER have casual sex with anyone...if you choose not to.

    Conversely, you could join plentyofish or match.com and have sex with every willing person you find. These things are tools through which you channel your behavior, your wants, your needs, your actions. Being on manhunt does not make you a slut and being on match doesn't make you husband materials by context alone.

    Yes, you can swim in a slightly clearer pond, but the outcome is all about your interaction with the other fish.
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    Mar 17, 2011 5:10 PM GMT
    I've noticed the same guys on the cruising sites are the same ones that have profiles on the less cruisy ones. It's pretty much the same people. At least in Vancouver...icon_confused.gif

    Sometimes it's best to just explicitly state in your profile that you're not looking for hook-ups.
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    Mar 17, 2011 5:13 PM GMT
    RunintheCity saidPeople, seriously.

    It's not about the site. It's about your behavior on it and your usage of it!

    You could bloody well join manhunt or menfucknow.com or whatever and NEVER have casual sex with anyone...if you choose not to.

    Conversely, you could join plentyofish or match.com and have sex with every willing person you find. These things are tools through which you channel your behavior, your wants, your needs, your actions. Being on manhunt does not make you a slut and being on match doesn't make you husband materials by context alone.

    Yes, you can swim in a slightly clearer pond, but the outcome is all about your interaction with the other fish.


    This, X10000.

    I dont know why people think the medium somehow matters, at the end of the day when you meet a person from the internet, you are meeting that person for the first time.

    Just remember that.
  • Runningrass

    Posts: 80

    Mar 17, 2011 5:25 PM GMT
    I really like OkCupid.
  • Jordie

    Posts: 1

    Mar 17, 2011 7:49 PM GMT
    awm55 saidI can't seem to find any gay dating websites aside from real jock that are not absurdly sexually explicit and full of guys looking for sex. Any suggestions would be great.
    Most of the sites do seem to be about erotica rather than relationships. I'm wanting to know how this club works in terms of finding someone around my age or a little older (52-62) in or near my area. I can't seem to figure out how, if there is a way, to do that on here. Help please?icon_cool.gif