Post grad opinion

  • sea_buddy

    Posts: 143

    Mar 19, 2011 7:27 AM GMT
    I've talked this out with a couple of people and it's basically left me more confused than before. I'm about to graduate from college in May. I'm going to graduate with a degree that allows me to be anywhere in the USA. The conflict for me is that I'm not sure if I want to stay in my city or move away.

    Pros to staying:
    1. Family is here
    2. I have an established friend base (but the closest ones are moving away to grad school)
    3. Fiscally responsible

    Pros to leaving:
    1. Explore new places (I'm thinking beach or mountain region)
    2. Be my own person entirely


    I'm sure there are more to those but I can't think of them right now. I know it would be responsible to stay in my city and network there, gain work experiences, promote friendships and all that. At the same time, though, I really think this is the time for me to see new places and enjoy life before I settle down somewhere.

    Does anyone have experience with making this decision? What helped you decide? How did you feel about the decision after you made it?



  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 19, 2011 9:49 AM GMT
    You listed Pros, but no Cons? icon_biggrin.gif And "not sure if I want to stay in my city or move away" isn't much of a con. You can "network, gain work experiences, promote friendships" in other cities as well. What's your reluctance?

    If you are able to get a job anywhere and are able to afford the cost of living in your chosen city, I think you should go for it. You're young and presumably unattached to anyone or anything. Now is the time to explore and experience new things. The older you get, the less opportunity you may have to make a big move to a new place.
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    Mar 19, 2011 3:29 PM GMT
    You are only young once. If you want to get outside of your safety bubble you should do it without hesitation. If you stay where you are: you might look back one day if everything has not worked out perfectly and regret the opportunity, the classic "the grass is always greener" situation.

    Friends and family can always buy a plane ticket to come see you. Facebook and Skype can keep old friendships going.

    Do it! It will make you more interesting icon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 19, 2011 3:42 PM GMT
    I moved across country when I was 21. It was the best thing I could've ever done for myself.

    I've moved back home for grad school and question myself on why I did this sometimes, but I know that it's only temporary.

    Get out of the midwest; It might just be the best thing you've ever done.
  • sea_buddy

    Posts: 143

    Mar 19, 2011 11:48 PM GMT
    Thanks for responding, guys! icon_smile.gif Very helpful points.

    I was really tired when I wrote it so it's a lil incoherent. Cons... I guess not taking a chance and seeing more of the world is a con for staying here. Con for moving away would be financial insecurity (just harder, not unmanageable) and difficulty making new friends/finding a new support structure.

    I think it would be a growing experience to move away and take this opportunity to be a changing point in my life. I'm not unhappy here by any means, but maybe I would like some other place better?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 20, 2011 12:39 AM GMT
    My decision to jump ship was complex but essentially boiled down to one point, a variation on the theme of the film Big Fish: I felt like I had experienced everything that could be offered by sticking around, so I left the small pond and jumped into the larger lake.

    If I had stuck around I am sure I would not have died of boredom, things probably would have kept me entertained, but sometimes uncertainty and difficulty and challenges just make you a better person. I aged pretty quickly having to fend for myself without a support structure - I consider that one of my favorite experiences of "growing up" so far.

    You can't make a wrong decision here and that is the good news - go out into the world and give it a shot - or stick with what you know and like best. Either way: good things will happen if you are willing to work for them (and just judging by how you are being thoughtful and not recklessly impulsive about this decision, clearly you are the kind of person who is willing to work hard to make good things happen.)

    Good luck with your final decision!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 20, 2011 12:41 AM GMT
    "Make voyages, attempt them! There is nothing else." -- Tennessee Williams

    ....get the hell out of Dodge... and enjoy a new take on life.
  • tuffguyndc

    Posts: 4437

    Mar 20, 2011 12:52 AM GMT
    first off, congrats on graduating. if i were you i would stay at home for a while until you can save enough money to make that move unless your family will be helping you. i say find a job near home stay at home for a year or so and move after that year is up. that way you can save money for your move.
  • Karnage

    Posts: 704

    Mar 20, 2011 1:11 AM GMT
    I say move someplace completely different. I just made my second cross-country move and I've loved it both times. I grew up in Minneapolis, and decided to go to a school in Cleveland where I wasn't going to know anyone. That transition allowed me to redefine myself and actually be openly gay. I just recently finished up school and moved to the DC area, again knowing absolutely no one here. I've only been here two months, but I am absolutely loving it. I think making a leap like that is something very challenging, and you grow extensively during the process

    Best of luck, and if you decide to move to the DC area, let me know! icon_smile.gif