Mar 30, 2011 10:01 PM GMT
So something I realized semi-recently is that I'm not fact-driven when it comes to getting to know men. How can you know someone if you don't ask them questions? Are you even interested in them? I am actually, quite a bit! I can pointlessly banter ad infinitum, but I've noticed guys have their set of questions they always ask when they're getting to know you. What do you work in? What's your living situation? What's your family like? What are you hobbies? What do you do for fun? Have you traveled? Where? What did you do?
These are all valid questions, and I enjoy answering them when they are asked to me. But I don't feel the need to ask them back. I don't really feel the need to ask them any questions at all. Knowing these facts about someone doesn't do anything for me. You could say I don't really care about them one way or the other.
But I do care about the person. I care about the sound of their voice, they way their face expresses emotion. I care about their eyes, the warmth of their hand. I care about how my name sounds when they say it, and I care about saying their name and letting them know it's important that their name is on my lips constantly. Their response to me not asking any questions is, unfortunately "I keep asking everything. You're not interested in getting to know me are you". Which is disheartening. It may be creepy, but my favorite way to get to know someone is just staring at them silently while holding them.
These are social deviations, yes. I'm curious to know if there's anyone else who doesn't have a checklist of questions to ask when you meet someone and if it's ever been taken the wrong way.