First time at gay club. Kinda scary...

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    Apr 03, 2011 6:23 AM GMT
    So I went for the first time to a gay club and it was very "different" to say the least... It was just a little too much for me, and not my type of croud. Maybe it was the drag queen show. Idk. Anyways.... Are there any other ways to meet people? And has anyone else had an experience like mine where younjust don't feel like you belong? Should i give it another try?
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    Apr 03, 2011 6:27 AM GMT
    Drag Shows and a Gay Club will probably turn you off the first time unless you're completely prepared or a little intoxicated.

    Give it another shot. Go with friends and strictly go to have a good time. There are ways to find other guys in the area! Mostly through other people and websites.

    My first experience I had a bunch to drink, I was still "straight" and I watched a large group of guys jump up and down and sing very loudly to "Since U Been Gone".

    It struck me as hilarious.
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    Apr 03, 2011 6:31 AM GMT
    It's funny the first "gay" club I went to was actually this weird fusion placed that labeled itself as "omnisexual", it honestly and veridically had half a gay crowd and half a straight one on most nights. I guess it kind of eased me into it. But I'd never go to a gay club unescorted.
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    Apr 03, 2011 6:33 AM GMT
    TrevorMark saidDrag Shows and a Gay Club will probably turn you off the first time unless you're completely prepared or a little intoxicated.

    Give it another shot. Go with friends and strictly go to have a good time. There are ways to find other guys in the area! Mostly through other people and websites.

    My first experience I had a bunch to drink, I was still "straight" and I watched a large group of guys jump up and down and sing very loudly to "Since U Been Gone".

    It struck me as hilarious.


    Lol the since you been gone thing would have been funny. I toook a couple shots before I went but I was still nervous as hell. I think the drag show was the main part that turned me off like you said. I saw more nakedness than I cared too. But I'll go with different friends and give it a try. And I guess I was too nervous I liked the music though!
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    Apr 03, 2011 6:38 AM GMT
    For crying out loud, you're in Cocoa Florida! Drive 4 hours south to Miami and maybe you'll see a better scene. Or did you go to Orlando?
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    Apr 03, 2011 6:51 AM GMT
    brianindenver saidFor crying out loud, you're in Cocoa Florida! Drive 4 hours south to Miami and maybe you'll see a better scene. Or did you go to Orlando?


    No we went to a small place in cocoa village. But we are going to Orlando next time
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    Apr 03, 2011 6:56 AM GMT
    the smaller the venue the weirder they get, go to big open ones in bigger cities :p
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    Apr 03, 2011 7:10 AM GMT
    Chill, dude. Just keep going a bit more and you will realise how stupendously funny a night out can be. Did you notice how uninhibited everybody was??? Felt like there were less rules than in an ordinary straight bar, yeah?? You will grow to appreciate it some more if you go with girls, they will have so much fun there too.
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    Apr 03, 2011 7:16 AM GMT
    Adrenalinejunkie saidNo we went to a small place in cocoa village. But we are going to Orlando next time


    Florida can have some of the most dingiest, smokiest, trashiest gay bars in the country. Stank. Add to the fact that so many wish to be a woman (and believes they are so rightfully entitled to be one). It's just a mess.

    Orlando will certainly be a step up. But don't go to Tampa unless you don't mind dodging bullets. God I hate that place....
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    Apr 03, 2011 2:13 PM GMT
    TrevorMark saidMy first experience I had a bunch to drink, I was still "straight" and I watched a large group of guys jump up and down and sing very loudly to "Since U Been Gone".




    So what turned you gay? The alcohol or Kelly Clarkson?
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    Apr 03, 2011 3:03 PM GMT
    First time I went to a same sex club I was bored to tears.
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    Apr 03, 2011 3:07 PM GMT
    miamimasseur said
    TrevorMark saidMy first experience I had a bunch to drink, I was still "straight" and I watched a large group of guys jump up and down and sing very loudly to "Since U Been Gone".




    So what turned you gay? The alcohol or Kelly Clarkson?

    Probably my innate physical attraction to men.
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    Apr 03, 2011 3:32 PM GMT
    I have sincerely never had a good time at a gay club so I quit going. The mixture of excessively loud music [that I don't even like,] very intoxicated people I am not the least bit interested in, the drag shows, the most unattractive Jersey Shore garbage popping their shirts off, and the Grabby McGrabbersons (while flattering - still unwanted) just turned me off.

    Are you looking for people to "meet" (use Grindr,) to make friends with (volunteer with a gay themed non-profit,) or to date?
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    Apr 03, 2011 6:45 PM GMT
    OMG.. I think I drove past and threw the parking lot of my first Gay bar 50 times before I got enough nerve to actually park and go inside.
    That was a long time ago.. Haha
    Called the "Connection"
    The first time I ever danced with another man it was to "Hungry like a wolf" by Duran Duran.. It was a new song then..
    But what great memories and welcoming attitude.
    Sadly those days are gone.
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    Apr 03, 2011 7:33 PM GMT

    No offense...but I just thought this was kinda funny....
    If going to THIS club freaked you out...you should change your profile name....icon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gif
    Where was your Adrenaline???

  • tazzari

    Posts: 2937

    Apr 03, 2011 7:38 PM GMT
    QUOTE AUTHOR GOES HEREAre there any other ways to meet people?


    Networking with gay friends has been my best bet; after that, being involved in an organization that does things you like to do can be a great way to go. And being out: if you're out, people will introduce themselves and come out to you in the darndest places - usually just in "real life": no need to go to clubs and bars unless you enjoy it.

    Good luck!
  • tuffguyndc

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    Apr 03, 2011 7:59 PM GMT
    i have been to gay clubs and i still feel like i do not belong there. i think you should try again though and see if it was just the nerves. i do not listen to techno nor club so i know it is not for me. anyhow, you can also try joining local social groups. there are tons of gay oriented social groups. i would try those.
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    Apr 03, 2011 8:49 PM GMT
    Friendsrbetter said
    No offense...but I just thought this was kinda funny....
    If going to THIS club freaked you out...you should change your profile name....icon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gif
    Where was your Adrenaline???



    Lol I didn't want to leave but it's was weird cause my friend that was with me wanted to leave. I was up for the adrenaline but seeing a naked tranny was kinda odd
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    Apr 03, 2011 9:29 PM GMT
    I dont usually go to gay bars,but I think people that CANT have fun are really just trying to tell themselves they dont like it.
    I have really good friends,most of them are straight and sometimes we will go to a gay bar and its always fun because I am with my friends and I will have fun with them no matter where I am.
    As long as there is music, a dancefloor, it doesnt really matter.
  • BardBear

    Posts: 533

    Apr 03, 2011 9:59 PM GMT
    Parliment House over in Orlando is huge...and can also be a bit much for some one kinda new to the scene. However, I think your concern is different--what about yourself don't you like that you can find fault with "the scene?"

    In other words, don't go there to judge. Don't go there to use it as a litmus test for an entire culture. Go there, instead, to be with your friends, listen to music and to dance.

    Don't go there for hook-ups or stare.

    If you meet someone, bully for you! Excellent! What an unexpected surprise!

    As for love and other things? Go ahead and do those things you like. Go to the beach. Go surfing. Join a book club. Take up a knitting group. Meet those men who have similar interests and that'll be much better for you.

    I did the club thing. But I met the man whom I would marry through chatting on similar boards elsewhere-over completely different topics other than being gay.

    I'll tell you about it sometime.

    Peace,
    Bardy
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    Apr 03, 2011 11:52 PM GMT
    brianindenver said
    Adrenalinejunkie saidNo we went to a small place in cocoa village. But we are going to Orlando next time


    Florida can have some of the most dingiest, smokiest, trashiest gay bars in the country. Stank. Add to the fact that so many wish to be a woman (and believes they are so rightfully entitled to be one). It's just a mess.

    Orlando will certainly be a step up. But don't go to Tampa unless you don't mind dodging bullets. God I hate that place....


    FYI, Mister Sister's in Orlando is smoke-free inside, and is now the only place I want to go because of that. However, you could also check out Pulse, especially if you want to wean yourself in with a more mixed crowd. Pulse has a healthy complement of blatantly straight girls on any given weekend.

    Reviews of Mister Sisters on Yelp:
    http://www.yelp.com/biz/mr-sisters-orlando
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    Apr 05, 2011 7:26 PM GMT
    Gay clubs suck, you can't look a person in the face without them mistaking it for an invitation for something sleazy.
    Oh and the music is horrible.
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    Apr 05, 2011 7:30 PM GMT
    It is all about how you approach the night. If you are a strong-willed, confident and an outspoken individual, you will have a good time because you know that the only person who is in control of yourself is you.

    In other words, don't get frightened by other people and don't let others determine how much "fun" you will get out of your night.

    My first gay club was an amazing experience. I met a bunch of neat people, different types of gay men for sure.
    Another thing for me was the fact that I don't drink alcohol, and everyone who randomly approached me with an alcoholic beverage to give me would get a "Thanks, but I don't drink"... and they told me they respect my choice and we would have a great convo afterwards!


    All you need is confidence.
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    Apr 05, 2011 8:02 PM GMT
    Gay bars are kind of like horror movies: If you experience enough bad ones you assume all of them are bad.

    But there are all types of bars for all types of men. I would rather go to a bar then a club so I can actually have a conversation with someone. But with a group of people you trust a big club can be a lot of fun.

    Oh and never sit in the front row in a drag show its asking for abuse, lol.
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    Apr 05, 2011 8:14 PM GMT
    It was probably all just a bit intimidating. Especially the drag show. Personally, I'm not into drag at all and it's not something I associate with myself or even like really. Drag is also something I know little to nothing about.

    But the gay club I always go to always has a drag show before and it stirs a lot of energy and after a few times, I can honestly say it's kinda fun. I would never do it, but I can accept the show and have fun because everyone else has a lot of fun. Definitely try a few more times and maybe even go to other clubs to see if you like one over the other etc. You;ll warm up to everything soon enough!