Waiting 2 hours for a guy to show up on a date.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 07, 2011 5:42 AM GMT
    So I met this guy, hot guy, nice, has a job, we hang out. Things are good, we hang out a couple of times he can't stop telling me how awesome I am, and how great I am. Blah blah blah. He says how much he really likes me and cares about me. We hang out more and more, and well... then all of a sudden nothing. I plan a dinner tonight where I make him food, and its going on 3 hours now he is late, and its 11:00 now and he just told me he is going to leave. I cancelled the date and told him nevermind. Was that the best thing to do?
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    Apr 07, 2011 5:54 AM GMT
    What was his excuse?
  • shiningstar

    Posts: 71

    Apr 07, 2011 10:18 AM GMT
    I think yes it is right to leave him
  • MikemikeMike

    Posts: 6932

    Apr 07, 2011 10:26 AM GMT
    staple_ saidWhat was his excuse?


    yeah???
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    Apr 07, 2011 10:27 AM GMT
    Unless you went out of your way to make this dinner then I wouldn't sweat it. Try talking to him first before jumping the gun and ruining something good before it even begins. Granted he should've called you to say he couldn't make it but shit happens. As long as you don't go all "chick" then you'll be fine and you still have the option of meeting other people since it sounds like it wasn't all that serious to begin with.
  • MikemikeMike

    Posts: 6932

    Apr 07, 2011 10:44 AM GMT
    True-- was it a date or a hook up??

    So many men confuse the two!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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    Apr 07, 2011 10:48 AM GMT
    Waiting 2 almost 3 hours is fucking unacceptable. You want a guy who values your time as much as he values your time WITH him.

    I waited over 30 minutes for a guy on a date once and I thought that was ridiculous.

    I wouldn't bother too much with him anymore, but that's just me.
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    Apr 07, 2011 10:58 AM GMT


    Yeah 3 hours is a joke,

    drop him and make him work to regain your interest.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 07, 2011 11:03 AM GMT
    Lots of douches out there in disguise. The real person within almost always emerges and spoils the pretty picture. I feel bad that you make dinner for your date i'm assuming and doesn't have the decentcy to at least keep you inform of his delay.

    Hey if he calls you back and wants to make up, then give him a chance. But if you don't hear from him, then nevermind him. Just move on. Oh and don't call him by any means. Let him contact you first.
  • Little_Spoon

    Posts: 1562

    Apr 07, 2011 11:13 AM GMT
    Check if he even pursues you after this...

    What effort is he willing to put out for you, you know.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 07, 2011 11:25 AM GMT
    What did you make him for dinner? icon_smile.gif
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    Apr 07, 2011 11:41 AM GMT
    I dated a guy who was chronically 1-2 hours late. He always had some dramatic excuse. He was a nice guy but very neurotic and it got old pretty quick. Move on.
  • alphatop

    Posts: 1955

    Apr 07, 2011 1:09 PM GMT
    Forget about him, and move on.
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Apr 07, 2011 1:11 PM GMT
    MuchMoreThanMuscle saidRegardless if you are dating or just having sex, if you make plans with someone and they keep you waiting around for three hours then tell him to piss off.

    The OP has not specified that they were dating so was this a whore night with food? If it was a whore night with a meal I think you should call it a wash.

    However, if you were dating then that makes matters worse.


    LOL.. "a whore night with a meal"....

    LLLLOOOLLLL
  • RD11

    Posts: 448

    Apr 07, 2011 1:17 PM GMT
    MuchMoreThanMuscle saidRegardless if you are dating or just having sex, if you make plans with someone and they keep you waiting around for three hours then tell him to piss off.

    The OP has not specified that they were dating so was this a whore night with food? If it was a whore night with a meal I think you should call it a wash.

    However, if you were dating then that makes matters worse.


    I love me a good whore nght, throw in a meal and i will never be late again.
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    Apr 07, 2011 1:33 PM GMT
    Jcaliguy saidI cancelled the date and told him nevermind. Was that the best thing to do?

    Yes. Sometimes an object lesson works best. Whether you want to give this guy a second chance sometime is your call, but maybe he'll learn from this.

    Story: my partner tells me that his previous partner was chronically late (and now tragically "late" forever). Well, one time they were invited to a formal sit-down dinner at a gay home. And as usual, the partner caused them both to arrive after dinner had begun.

    Well, the host refused to sit them! And said they had to wait in the library until the soup was removed before they could come to table. The partner wanted to leave immediately, but my future partner, who was already furious they had gotten there late in the first place, he always being punctual (and still is), refused to drive them and said they'd sit right there.

    They were both humiliated, but my partner endured it so his guy would get the message. And he tells me his late partner was never late again. Especially with memories of the infamous "soup incident" with which to prod him when he was slow getting ready to go out somewhere.
  • matt13226

    Posts: 829

    Apr 07, 2011 3:17 PM GMT
    maybe something came up at work or something i would give him the benefit of the doubt tell him how it made you feel that he didnt even call. i would just tell him whats on your mind and talk it out and schedule another date if same thing happens plan another plan it like baseball 3 strikes and hes out.
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    Apr 07, 2011 3:30 PM GMT
    If you really like this guy, at least give him a chance to tell you why he was caught up. Then you can decide.

    If you don't like him anyway, it's your perfect chance to dump his sorry ass.

    Sounds like you him though otherwise you wouldn't have gone through all that trouble to cook him dinner. Right?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 07, 2011 3:42 PM GMT
    Peace....icon_cool.gif
  • tuffguyndc

    Posts: 4437

    Apr 07, 2011 4:01 PM GMT
    ok did you find out why he was late? i mean 3 hours is pretty extreme and very rude. anyhow, if you two have been doing great this far it sounds very weird that he would just stand you up. anyhow, figure out what happened?
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    Apr 07, 2011 4:22 PM GMT
    Agreed with most; 3 hours is ridiculous. At the very least he should have had some respect to say, "Hey, running late" or "Actually, I don't want this anymore." Wait for his excuse and then decide, maybe he won't even nut up for that.

    And Art_Deco, that story is awesome.
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    Apr 07, 2011 4:27 PM GMT
    My first instinct would be to call him 20-30 minutes after he's late. You never know what could have happened: Car trouble, unexpected work load, ran into someone and got to talking, lost track of time with something, completely forgot... And for someone that you've been seeing for a while and that has a good track record, I'd give them the benefit of the doubt.

    If you stand around twiddling your thumbs just waiting for him, and then jump to conclusions, YOU could end up being the ass in this situation. I would have called, seen what was up, and then if the calls were ignored or if he actually picked up and told you that he had canceled or some other unacceptable excuse... then I'd be done with him.

    People who automatically assume things are not worth taking advise from, especially since they don't know anything about this guy you're seeing. But then again I'm a very easy going guy, and rarely get upset about tardiness or having to wait or anything. Although it bugs me, spending time with someone is more important than holding a grudge for being late or something else.
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    Apr 07, 2011 5:12 PM GMT
    in the advent of advanced communications, there isnt really an excuse to make someone wait without a text/call/email etc, I would kick him to the gutter unless there was some earth shattering reason for his behaviour! Respect is priceless, a call/txt is a few cent!
  • LuckyGuyKC

    Posts: 2080

    Apr 07, 2011 5:20 PM GMT
    holyrood saidin the advent of advanced communications, there isnt really an excuse to make someone wait without a text/call/email etc, I would kick him to the gutter unless there was some earth shattering reason for his behaviour! Respect is priceless, a call/txt is a few cent!


    This ^^ +1

    But if this was the first time, let him know why you cancelled and give a change to ask for a second chance. Depending on his reaction you can decide if he's worthy.

  • brendanmuscle...

    Posts: 593

    Apr 07, 2011 10:11 PM GMT
    I agree, you should give him another chance and see how it goes.