blactor saidPs; I have a good bullshit detector too and know when to end something: but the way you communcated it was totally inappropriate. Granted the OP has some part to play, but he needs support- not being told he's a fool. Think how you'd feel? Treat others the way YOU want to be treated!
Well that's your opinion on the situation, blactor, and you're certainly entitled to them but if you think what I've said is inappropriate then as a courtesy I suggest you block and ignore my comments from here on out so you don't have to deal with them anymore. I DO treat people the way I want to be treated (that's a given) and it seems to work well for me for if it didn't I wouldn't have friends who cherish my honesty. I'd say half the reason they befriended me is because I'm honest and don't bullshit with niceties.
As for supporting goes, I would think my "insensitivity" and rather harsh and "inappropriate" honesty (as you call it) on the matter was being supportive. If I was physically there with the OP now I would punch him in the shoulder, call him foolish, tell him he fucked up, tell him to suck it up because he got played, tough it out and move on with his life instead of coddling him and saying something patronizing like "There, there. It will be alright. You couldn't have known." Fuck that. On too many occasions do so many people sugarcoat stuff like this and it stifles people.
How would I feel? I'd feel fucking stupid and I'd want my friends or anyone who was capable of being honesty to tell me so even at the cost of being insensitive. That's how'd I feel. Being supportive doesn't mean you cradle a weakness. You point out that flaw(s) and apply a solution to make to fix it, get it over and press on forward knowing that when you need an honest answer you have someone there to give it to you straight. It's like correcting someone on long division.
OP, you believe freely. It is not something that is forced upon you. You wanted to believe your ex would stop lying to you (you knew he was) and you let your emotions get the better of you because you wanted to believe things would be better even though you knew differently. You let your heart take control and you put your brain in the backseat. Simple as that. At some point I know you had to have spoken to your friends about your situation and you should be kicking their asses for not being supportive and keeping it real and if they did then you should be kicking yourself for not listening. No sense crying over spilled milk though. What's done is done. Just don't do it again. Love is a wonderful thing (I'm sure) but it's also a horrible and damaging beast as you have just found out first hand. Lesson learned and I hope you aren't in the habit of making repeat mistakes.
I'm glad you are being proactive with this and able to talk about it. You should take the good with the bad and grow/learn from it.