Ever had a really terrible thought and you actually throw up?. Ever got disgusted of someone that you really hate and you don't want to talk to them?. Ever wonder that enough is enough? Ever tried being the Victim of something(experience) that it just makes you have that tight feeling inside your throat(like its constricting your airhole)?. How many times can your heart break till you really have enough of whats going around inside you?. No matter how much you move on, it just keeps on hurting you; Although you don't want to burden your friends with your constant whining and telling you to stop being so "pessimistic". Would it be best if you could just hold it in and just pretend nothing happened to you?..... Even when your head starts to really hurt because of all the thoughts and control you put in that feeling of depression(even if u had help from a Doctor or Therapist)....Yes, Every person has his own opinions; but you don't have the right to just judge that person's feelings and personality(considering you don't know him). Yes, I did everything like: going out more and all that social stuff, still dont work; and Yes I did what my Doctor said(even though the Doctors here in my place are rumored to kill people with their occasional "oh shit sorry i have you the wrong drug".). Oh, and It is not me that is a problem. And Yes, I'm still sane.

The only solution is to just hold it in and just shut up, i don't think that no one will even know what you truly feel. Is this ludicrous? Is this all a fantasy to just cower of speaking it?. Tell me, if there is something to hope for. I'm just so confused....... Any answer would help(its ok if its mean, just don't sound like a TOTAL BITCH/CUNT, like i always say: "everyone can see what you post, so they will know who the real you is". ); thanks.

0dbbe.jpg yeah i know it looks funny or retarded, but you should get a slight idea of what is inside me right now or what i have to deal with...