My straight friend is kinda annoying me now

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    Apr 10, 2011 6:13 AM GMT
    Sorry so long but i have to vent so here it go



    Ok, i recently posted about how my straight friends flirts with me and shit and says shit that is juss ubber gay but now he is getting annoying. He gets madd and i guess jealous when i say i have a date or that another guy is texting me. he takes my phone and reads my messages then says awwww thats cute. He even tells me he loves me but i recently told him to cut that shit out because i dont love him and it annoys me when ppl say I Love You to me all the damn time. he has also gotten overly playful like he is 10 and i actually see him a lot more then i prolly should for him to be straight. We take eachother out to the movies and dinner ut just as friends.

    He is also getting more cocky saying shit like i know u want me and shit and im like bitch plz i can do way better then you or i say only if im desperate.he says shit like i know how u really feel and talks more about his girlfriends and how they fuck him over all the time, i tell him to turn gay and shut tha fuck up. But, he still talks about it and jokes about being gay. I use to actually be closer to him but he has a alpha male syndrome type personality were he has to win in every game he has to hit me all the time and win and he has to be the best and have the best. I am like omg you so superfisical that its disgusting, But he still does it. I gives him advice on shit but he never really listens to my problems. I recently told him that i could never open up to him because he only thinks of him and it pisses me off that he uses me emotionally to get advice for his relationships that i tell him from the start will fail because he is to nice to girls and brags about his job and the money he makes and also about cars he has yet to buy, he is a golddiggers dream.

    My thing is this im kinda over him almost on every level we had a mini fight today and i had to be the bigger man, as always, and drop it cus he kept punching me in my arm and rough housing me. I told him my right arm has nerve damage but he kept on till i got piss and hit him in his arm harder then i normally do and said stop. He got mad saying ur a pussy i got scar tissue in this arm, I was like really never damage is worse then scar tissue my arm goenumbe sometimes but thingles and aches a year after my wreck. I am really lost because the friendship to me is breaking idk if its me or him going through his shit but i am getting annoyed. I even tried to avoid him one day but he came in my house begged me to go out of town with him and juss nagged me till i was like ok. But, what has really pissed me off was that fact that his is more aggressive now he threw a penny or something at my car to be funny i was pissed and juss looked at him like he was dumb because if i would of did it to him he would of bitched and moaned about his was not thrown as hard as mines.

    So, has anyone ever had to deal with this change of heart in a friendship. I mean in general i am tired of the reading my phone and emails demanding i tell him who i talk to and checking up on my shit. Then he say slick shit like u cant get anyone cause ur gay. Im like dude ur a closet fag so fuck u and go suck a dick. Idk if he is really scared of being gay or if he is juss comfy with himself because he tells me he like anal sex with girls alot and eating ass he said he loves the butt. but yet he does weird shit that suggest he might be bi. But, honestly im not that interested in him. So i now kinda lie to him to get breaks. So any advice, o i am planning to move which he will hate but o well he aint my man. He has gotten pissed cause i wanted to move before lol
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    Apr 10, 2011 10:11 AM GMT
    I don't know what advice you want (hell, I don't know if I am the one to offer interpersonal relationship advice.) Friendships change and evolve. If you need to distance yourself from him a little it is not a bad thing. He likely fulfilled some need in your life a few years back and now as you (or he) has changed it is no longer working for you, and he seems a little more aggressive than what you want / need in a best friend.

    No point in talking to him and asking him to change his core personality. Move on a little... no need to cut him completely out of the picture at this point, but start doing some stuff with other people.

    Wow, I feel like dear Abby now.icon_razz.gif
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    Apr 10, 2011 4:07 PM GMT
    west77 saidI don't know what advice you want (hell, I don't know if I am the one to offer interpersonal relationship advice.) Friendships change and evolve. If you need to distance yourself from him a little it is not a bad thing. He likely fulfilled some need in your life a few years back and now as you (or he) has changed it is no longer working for you, and he seems a little more aggressive than what you want / need in a best friend.

    No point in talking to him and asking him to change his core personality. Move on a little... no need to cut him completely out of the picture at this point, but start doing some stuff with other people.

    Wow, I feel like dear Abby now.icon_razz.gif


    It's good advice icon_smile.gif I agree. It seems like he's trying to make you feel negatively about yourself, and no one needs friends like that.
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    Apr 10, 2011 5:19 PM GMT
    Although he's straight, he can still be feeling jealousy. After all, you guys are practically dating anyway, right? He doesn't have any other friends he can hang with to pass the time when you're on a romantic date, I assume.

    Best thing: help him find another friend. Maybe a girlfriend. It might be helpful if she likes roughhousing, which is what he enjoys about you. After he begins to make more private time for himself you'll get some relief.
  • B71115

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    Apr 10, 2011 5:19 PM GMT
    He's gay and wants to experiment.
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    Apr 10, 2011 7:11 PM GMT
    C'mon man we have half brothers here at RJ who have once stated they was straight, even had the wives and kids, or just did the nasty with women too prove it! Now they want too stand under our banner of gay, and pretend to be one of us now. The complexities of bisexuality, our half brothers.
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    Apr 10, 2011 7:15 PM GMT
    I had to get away from someone like this who was married but kept messing with my head. Very similar, with the physical aggression, the passive-aggressive comments. He also liked to throw shit out there to give me the idea that something I did or said really hurt him and then yank it back again, or initiate and then "forget" plans and make it sound like I was the one who flaked. Eventually I just got tired of the head games and distanced myself. It's tough because we have mutual friends but I really didn't feel like dealing with it anymore.
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    Apr 10, 2011 7:18 PM GMT
    I didn't read it all- 'cause I'm lazy and semi-illiterate- but it sounds like you need a cooling off period- I've had several with my girlfriend.
    We get back together soon enough- make-up etc. icon_redface.gif
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    Apr 10, 2011 7:32 PM GMT
    Tell him to put his lips where his mouth is. Dare him to kiss you next time he says he is gay. His alpha male is probably his insecurity of coming out.

    Or just tell him to fuck off...
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    Apr 11, 2011 11:06 AM GMT
    we hung out today and i told him about it and we laughed at the whole fight he actually got embarrassed because a friend of mines said we act like we are married because we seriously argue over dumb shit then make up. but he does come to my house alot and says i love u alot to i told him to stop that gay shit around because it makes me sick. but hinestly i feel like he is a lil slow for me to rally want something more but idk he likes to slap my butt and touch my thigh alot.
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    Apr 11, 2011 11:08 AM GMT
    He's not straight. He's closeted, and wants to be with you.
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    Apr 11, 2011 11:13 AM GMT
    Get your dick out and tell him to suck it or GTFO.
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    Apr 11, 2011 11:19 AM GMT
    lol blah blah blah..... sorry m8 I only read through some of your entry but seriously!!!, Dude!!!! offer your pillow and see his reaction..
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    Apr 11, 2011 12:59 PM GMT
    creamcraver4u saidlol blah blah blah..... sorry m8 I only read through some of your entry but seriously!!!, Dude!!!! offer your pillow and see his reaction..



    i have i tell him all the time ur a closet homo go suck a dick
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    Apr 11, 2011 1:01 PM GMT
    Pure saidGet your dick out and tell him to suck it or GTFO.



    he has seen me naked and he showed me his dick like alot of times the other day when we were wrestling i got behind him and humped him for a min he was like omg this feels weird lol but i have told him that before to suck my dick and shut tha fuck up lol
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    Apr 11, 2011 1:18 PM GMT
    Whether he is straight, bi, closeted, or whatever, true friends know each other's boundaries and how to respect them. Good-natured rough-housing and trash-talking is par for the course among deep friends, but if the action from either of you extends into a bullying or physical/property damage situation it's not good in the long term.

    I can't tell the physical age of your ace, but it appears he has a mere immaturity problem, hampered by his own sexuality issues. I'd say call and tell him you need some space... really he needs space to grow the hell up, but to sell it, you can tell him you'll need space to be able to find relationships among your gay and bi brethren and be comfortable in doing so without jerk friends scaring them off. Right now, he's just crimpin' your style. Lay off the dinners and flicks for awhile.

    If he needs to gripe about his real and imagined girlfriends, let him send you e-mails (don't respond to IMs). Part of his immaturity is his desperation for immediate feedback. And often when our dialogue is verbal and face-to-face, especially among people we're close with, there's no delete button, so we say and do things we can't take back. When he begs and pleads and tries to visit, make it plain that you have NO time for him... leave a message and you'll get back to him when you can. Forcing him to communicate with you from a distance for awhile may help him practice gathering his thoughts and rethinking his actions. In time, you'll be able to tell from his e-mails if he's grown up enough...or not... to communicate more directly.

    If you truly value his friendship, and you're not attracted to him, for gawdsakes do NOT offer him your pillow. That's not something you do as a dare, it surely will be of no help to you. And I trust there are a myriad of ways to tell him off without resorting to homophobic comebacks like "you're a closet f*g" and "go suck a d*ck". If necessary, use your wit and your mental Rolodex of his many failed hetero relationships to playfully dress him down, without cussing. Don't bring the discourse down to the level where he (and only he) wants it to be.
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    Apr 12, 2011 4:30 AM GMT
    dayumm saidWhether he is straight, bi, closeted, or whatever, true friends know each other's boundaries and how to respect them. Good-natured rough-housing and trash-talking is par for the course among deep friends, but if the action from either of you extends into a bullying or physical/property damage situation it's not good in the long term.

    I can't tell the physical age of your ace, but it appears he has a mere immaturity problem, hampered by his own sexuality issues. I'd say call and tell him you need some space... really he needs space to grow the hell up, but to sell it, you can tell him you'll need space to be able to find relationships among your gay and bi brethren and be comfortable in doing so without jerk friends scaring them off. Right now, he's just crimpin' your style. Lay off the dinners and flicks for awhile.

    If he needs to gripe about his real and imagined girlfriends, let him send you e-mails (don't respond to IMs). Part of his immaturity is his desperation for immediate feedback. And often when our dialogue is verbal and face-to-face, especially among people we're close with, there's no delete button, so we say and do things we can't take back. When he begs and pleads and tries to visit, make it plain that you have NO time for him... leave a message and you'll get back to him when you can. Forcing him to communicate with you from a distance for awhile may help him practice gathering his thoughts and rethinking his actions. In time, you'll be able to tell from his e-mails if he's grown up enough...or not... to communicate more directly.

    If you truly value his friendship, and you're not attracted to him, for gawdsakes do NOT offer him your pillow. That's not something you do as a dare, it surely will be of no help to you. And I trust there are a myriad of ways to tell him off without resorting to homophobic comebacks like "you're a closet f*g" and "go suck a d*ck". If necessary, use your wit and your mental Rolodex of his many failed hetero relationships to playfully dress him down, without cussing. Don't bring the discourse down to the level where he (and only he) wants it to be.


    Yea he is immature but it is cause he is spoiled and been given everything in life, and im the opposite i have had to work for my stuff and to him he does'nt get it. I think he envies me and others like his older brother. because he tries to hard at shit like finding someone wanting a family and stuff, losing weight trying to get fit and stuff he is juss un focused. he has constantly said to me how do u get a newer car with no job im like that's my hussle get urs i know how to work and save ai make goals and plans u dont. He then hushes and get a mood shift at times and he competes with me and my body which is y i dont work out with him at the gym because its a competition at times because he use to be bigger but lost 75lbs and now he is 185 but idk he has issues that i try to help with but i cant sacrifice myself for him.