my man wont let me rim him

  • newbiebottom

    Posts: 38

    Apr 18, 2011 10:25 PM GMT
    so we have been dating for two months. both of us are tops, both of us love rimming, but he doesn't like to get rimmed. neither of us like to bottom, but we are both getting into it for each other's pleasure, and he would rather my dick be inside him than me to rim him or finger him. not sure if he's self conscious about hygiene or what? he's super hot and has an amazing body.

    any suggestions, ideas? i get really turned on by rimming.
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    Apr 18, 2011 10:32 PM GMT
    Tell him to deal with it?

    I mean, to be honest newbiebottom, it sounds like your attracted to the man, and get along great, but you guys dont really seem sexually compatible.

    This may be a short fix to the problem, but by learning, or forcing, yourself into roles that you may not like, then it may hinder the relationship long term.

    Have you thought of this?
  • newbiebottom

    Posts: 38

    Apr 18, 2011 10:41 PM GMT
    we have thought about sexual compatibility. but both of us are willing to become versatile because we want the other person to feel good. of course we do other things besides, fuck, but our fucks have been intense.
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    Apr 18, 2011 10:43 PM GMT
    newbiebottom saidwe have thought about sexual compatibility. but both of us are willing to become versatile because we want the other person to feel good. of course we do other things besides, fuck, but our fucks have been intense.


    Thats the issue, though, is right now your in the honeymoon phase where everything needs to be perfect, yet that isnt going to last. Of course you want to please the other person, its just normal. Sexual compatibility happens when a person likes to stick his junk in a persons trunk, who likes that as well. Im not saying break up with him, but you guys might be better off as friends.
  • newbiebottom

    Posts: 38

    Apr 19, 2011 12:46 AM GMT
    its funny, cause he loves the taste of ass, and we kiss after he rims me. in the beginning, he wouldn't let me massage his feet, now thats not a problem. when he gets out of bed, he puts on his underwear. so he's clearly self conscious about something. his ass is amazing btw. i mean ridiculously amazing.

    so would you bring this up as you are hooking up, or in the middle of the day over lunch ;)
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    Apr 19, 2011 2:55 AM GMT
    Perhaps he's simply self-conscious. Try rimming him without completely removing his underwear. You can also cut a small hole in the underwear as close to the love canal as possible so you can insert your tongue there without making him really self-conscious. I have a 100% success rate with both approaches so I know they work.
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    Apr 19, 2011 4:24 AM GMT
    Well first u need to post a pic of Ur super hot bf icon_wink.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 19, 2011 5:56 AM GMT
    Sometimes people don't want to get rimmed because of the feeling itself, not necessarily because they are afraid they are not clean.

    I mean, if he really was afraid he is not clean down there then he can just hop in the shower, take some soap and clean the f*ck out of it and rinse it like hell... making it close to being perfectly clean.

    I just think he does not enjoy the feeling of rimming.
  • newbiebottom

    Posts: 38

    Apr 19, 2011 9:41 PM GMT
    i like the rimming through the underwear idea; that may be a good place to start.
  • LuvRockett

    Posts: 8

    Apr 22, 2011 4:23 PM GMT
    I think your relationship sounds great. Both of you have already shown that you value one another by exploring new sexual activities to please one another.

    For many guys it just takes time to get comfortable being rimmed. For me it has more to do with a concern of being clean enough and that I may be embarrassed if I'm not.

    I would hesitate to jump to the conclusion that you are "not sexually compatible" just because he's not currently comfortable with rimming, and I certainly wouldn't let a great relationship pass me by over an issue like that. If the relationship is great, the sex will be great. And you've only been dating for two months. That's not a long time... you've still got a lot of room to grow together.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 23, 2011 12:03 AM GMT
    Iv'e had a guy like that.

    I pinned his hips against the floor and rimmed him anyway.

    I also got incredibly turned on and started making noises hahaha.

    Once he realised how turned on I was by rimming him he shut up and started enjoying himself!

    Then he couldn't keep his arse off my face.

    It was awesome!

    But I tend to be very... umm.. forceful in dealing with stuff hahaha
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    Apr 23, 2011 10:04 PM GMT
    Chainers saidTell him to deal with it?

    I mean, to be honest newbiebottom, it sounds like your attracted to the man, and get along great, but you guys dont really seem sexually compatible.

    This may be a short fix to the problem, but by learning, or forcing, yourself into roles that you may not like, then it may hinder the relationship long term.

    Have you thought of this?


    They're only sexually incompatible because they're forcing themselves into an anal paradigm. Topping or bottoming isn't a part of being attracted to another guy. Why bother if you don't even like it?
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    Apr 23, 2011 10:18 PM GMT
    Animus saidThey're only sexually incompatible because they're forcing themselves into an anal paradigm. Topping or bottoming isn't a part of being attracted to another guy. Why bother if you don't even like it?

    While you are correct in a sense. Being attracted to a guy is about being attracted to the guy (although I am rather attracted to a nice arse also) having sex with the person you are attracted to emotionally and physically is another way of expressing your desire for them.


    But Animus, I think there is a bigger underlying issue for you and your very.. erm.. almost loud stance that we here at RJ don't know about (or at least i don't) for your reasons.

    SO.. Newbiebottoms wants to rim his man.. his man doesn't want him too for what ever reason.. His man needs to understand that sex isn't all about him.. Newbiebottom obviously feels desire to be sexually intimate with his man in every way possible.. that includes shoving his tongue up the guys arse.. SOOOOO they need to either find a way around it so both people are happy or.. well.